Room Service Page #7

the whole amount to you personally.

How do we know your credit is good?

Well, I want this bill wiped off

my first report, and I can't do that

- unless I have a cheque deposited against it.

- Gordon, for once in your life, pay a bill.

You might as well.

All right, I'll do it for you, Joe.

Thanks, Miller.

And by the way, I want to move out

of this frowzy little dungeon immediately.

- I want the best suite in the hotel.

- I'll give you the bridal suite.

All right, and about three brides.

- I'm awfully sorry I misjudged you.

- Well, good luck. I hope you have a hit.

- I'll draw up the lease for the theatre.

- Got the cheque?

- Here it is.

- Zachary Fiske.

Well?

Well, hail and farewell.

Goodbye, Mr Davis.

- Christine, I'm paying a bill.

- Darling!

Oh, boy. That's great, but

how about the cast, boss?

Yes, they can't live in the lobby.

Everybody move in again.

The hotel is wide open.

- Davis.

- We're rich!

15 grand!

- I just saw Mr Jenkins in the lobby.

- I suppose he told you?

He told me.

He's going to stop payment on the cheque.

He said the only reason he endorsed it

was just to get out of here.

But he can't do that. He

signed a contract. Or did he?

Gee, I feel sick.

Four months to get it,

and one minute to lose it.

They can't do this to me.

I'm going to sue the hotel for $100,000.

You haven't got a leg to stand on.

Then I'll sue Zachary

Fiske. I'll sue Jenkins.

But he didn't sign the contract.

There must be somebody I can sue.

Gee, I'm sorry, but I guess

I'll have to take my play to Mr Fremont.

But you can't do that. It's all we have.

- I know that, but...

- But it isn't fair.

We've worked on it for five months.

I've missed my lunches for rehearsals.

I realise all that,

but I can't wait another five months.

- I've got to make some money.

- You're thinking of Hilda, aren't you?

Not only that...

Well, if it's the waiter you're worried

about, he'll get the part, won't he?

Gee, I don't know what to say.

If we only had another backer.

Davis, we have a backer. Wagner is putting

that cheque through his bank, isn't he?

- Yeah.

- Well, for five days,

we have $15,000 worth of credit.

- Gordon, you're not...

- Why not? We're all rehearsed.

- We can open in five days.

- Sure.

All we need is scenery and costumes.

- We can charge that to the hotel.

- But it's illegal. It's...

Relax, Davis. Wagner is backing the play.

Jumping butterballs!

Well Joe, in a little while,

our fortune will be made.

Your 10/ of the show

will make you a rich man.

You and Flossie can have a bridal suite, too.

I certainly hope so.

Say, that waiter looks great in that part.

How'd you happen to think of him?

- Sasha?

- The minute I set eyes on him,

I said to myself, "There's a great actor".

I can spot them a mile away,

especially if I'm hungry.

Come in.

There you are, Mr Wagner.

They told me you was up here.

- Mr Wagner?

- Oh, it's nothing.

Would you mind signing this receipt again?

- Well...

- What receipt?

Come back later. I'm busy.

But the bank clerk rejected your signature.

- The bank?

- I just signed something. It's nothing, Joe.

- Come back in the morning.

- I must have it tonight, Mr Wagner.

This is not Mr Wagner.

Let me see that receipt.

I'm the hotel manager.

Not Mr Wagner?

No wonder that signature ain't good.

Good heavens!

- It's just as big a blow to me.

- The cheque, it bounced.

I walked into your office this afternoon.

This gentleman says he's Mr Wagner

and signs a receipt.

The bank won't accept the signature.

Buddy, you go back to the bank

and tell them Mr Wagner can't be reached.

- But this is strict orders...

- Come back in the morning.

- $15,000.

- Now, don't get panicky, Joe.

Pull yourself together,

and for Pete's sake, don't tell Wagner.

I was saving my little surprise till now.

Well.

- How do you like it, Joe?

- What?

I like it.

Well, then, let's have a drink on it.

Right off the ice, finest stuff there is.

I'm overwhelmed.

Well, after all, you're a guest

in good standing now, you know?

Of course, you still owe us a little bill,

huh, Joe?

Well?

As soon as I finish dressing.

Oh, dear!

You know, regardless of how

I feel about that fellow personally,

I still think it was a good idea

to make this gesture.

Yes, sir. After all...

Say, you look pale. Is something wrong?

I don't feel so good.

Hm. It must have been

that fish we had for dinner.

The food in this hotel is certainly crummy.

Imagine a shrewd manipulator like Fiske,

putting his money in a piece of cheese.

Not me.

Come now. Snap out of it. Take it easy.

Hello?

At this hour? Well, put him on.

It's a clerk at the bank.

Hello? Yes, this is Mr Wagner.

Verify what signature?

What receipt?

Just a moment.

Did you sign my name to a receipt today?

Why, no.

What's it for?

Some cheque came back.

Probably some transient.

I have to get a headache powder.

So I shall take this up with my bookkeeper!

I can't be bothered with...

What's that?

Zachary Fiske? You investigated?

He stopped it?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no!

In the morning, in the morning,

in the morning...

# I'm heading for the last roundup

# Git along little doggie

Git along little doggie

# Git along little doggie

Git along

# I'm heading for the last roundup #

Wagner, you don't know how lucky you are.

You're in the hotel business.

No headaches, no worries...

Come, brother Wagner,

let's start the champagne flowing.

Now, you don't mind

if Binelli joins our little party.

Oh, no. No.

In fact, I insist,

but I hope to make it a real party.

I have another surprise for you, boys.

A big surprise.

Now, don't go away.

I'd like to get a licence to hunt Wagner.

He'd look great alongside of my moose.

Hey, what's the big surprise?

I just ran into Mr Wagner. He insisted

I come in here and have a drink.

He's gone backstage to get Faker, too.

He said he had a great big surprise

just for the four of us.

Gee, I always thought they celebrated

after an opening, not before.

That depends. With a show like

this, you celebrate before.

It's awfully hard to celebrate

when you're running from an audience

that wants its money back.

Hello?

Gribble.

Yes, Joe?

What's the matter? Who told him?

Joe! Joe!

- Wagner found out?

- They called him from the bank.

- Well, what's he going to do?

- Joe couldn't talk.

I don't see what you fellows

are so frightened about.

Mr Wagner was bound to discover it anyway.

There's nothing he can do now.

I'm going down and face him.

- Maybe the kid's right.

- Come on. Let's go down.

Hey, where do you think you're going?

Get back in there.

- Well, you can't keep me here.

- Oh, can't we?

- The house d*cks. - Get in there,

corn-fed and be quick about it.

- You can't do this to me! I'm the author!

- Here's your hat.

Oh, what's the use? I give up.

I've got actors in the dressing room, scenery

on the stage, and an audience in the theatre,

and I've got to sit in a hotel room

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