Russell Madness Page #5

We have no more money.

And we can't hold any events

at our arena

until we pass the inspection.

But he's like a banana

with too many brown spots.

Not to be trusted.

Don't worry about it, okay?

I got this.

It takes two to tango.

I've seen you dance

and that tango comment

is not instilling confidence.

You just zip it.

Nate, what are you

doing sitting there?

Come on, join the fun.

You know my attorney, Milo.

Nice to meet you.

Charmed, I'm sure.

Listen, Nate, we love Russell

around here at the WUF.

We think he's going to be big.

I mean, bigger than big.

I want him to have his own line

of action toys, lunch boxes.

You name it, you're going to see

his face right on it.

Let the WUF take

the monkey off your back!

Yoo-hoo, I heard that.

I'm right here.

Easy, cowboy.

So, what's your offer,

Mr. Vaughn?

Well, in exchange for

the use of our WUF brand and

to have access

to all of our talent...

51 percent.

Fifty-one percent?

Yeah, that's what I said.

It's... It's my final offer.

Come on, Nate, use your head.

Don't be such a cheeky monkey.

Hey, cheeky?

What? Do you want a

small piece of a big pie,

or would you rather

have no pie at all?

Oh, no. Oh, no, no.

I like pie.

On two conditions:

All the home events take

place at the Ferraro arena.

Which means that you supply

the money to bring the

building back up to code.

We wouldn't want to burn

down the house now, would we?

Hey, you're telling me.

That nostalgic arena

is priceless, isn't it?

All right, fine.

You got yourself a deal.

- Thank you.

- Don't do it, Nate.

Welcome to the big show!

Don't worry.

It's just temporary.

As soon as we pay him back,

this building is ours.

Free and clear.

Well, Mr. Ferraro.

I'm happy to report your

arena meets the inspection.

Congratulations!

Thank you so much, Mrs... Olsen.

And it's Thursday night

and Ferraro Wrestling

has never looked better.

Russell Maniac's opponent,

the Mongol,

looks intimidating, Mike.

- You can do it!

- Come on, Russ!

That's my golden boy

right there.

Woo-hoo!

He rocks the Mongol

in the middle of the ring.

One!

Two, three!

He is out!

The Mongol has been knocked back

into the 14th century.

- This dog is unstoppable.

- Yeah!

I feel bad for Russell's

next opponent.

He must be terrier-fied.

That was great. That was

poetry in motion. Even better.

I mean you ever tried reading

poetry in motion,

it gets all jumbled.

Either way, you've just turned

wrestling into an art form.

We've got to name

your signature move, kid.

We'll call it

the "Russell Tussle".

Sounds good, Hunk.

All right, listen up, Russy,

and listen good.

Because I'm only

going to say this once.

I'm...

I'm proud of you, kiddo.

There, I said it, now let's

not get all sentimental here.

Thanks, Hunk.

How about a hug?

No can do.

This is business, kid.

How about a banana Popsicle?

Don't worry, guys.

You can follow the whole tour

on WU F's YouTube channel,

and we'll be back

before you know it.

In time for my birthday?

Are you kidding me? We wouldn't

miss that for the world.

And what about Easter?

Hunk had promised me

he'd help me find Easter eggs.

You betcha, kid.

I'm pretty sure there's

an anniversary in there as well.

I know. Bring it in.

Come here, Russell.

Okay, come on, Russell!

Let's get this

show on the road!

Fame and fortune

waits for no one.

From the ground to profound

Like a phoenix...

I have to see

the Russell Tussle.

Can you please do it?

Come on,

you've got to do it once for us.

I need Russell Tussle

in my life, baby. Come on!

Give me the tussle, baby.

Oi!

Such heroics,

such heroics, heroics

The tickets sold,

opponents roll'

Max, over here.

Lena, over here!

Look.

Hi, Lena. Hi, Max.

- Hi, Dad.

- Hi, Dad.

- Hi, Russell.

- Hi, Hunk.

Hey, don't eat too many eggs.

They'll make you very gassy.

Trust me.

Russell tussle,

chic and muscle

Maniac, maniac... '

Okay, let me see it.

Yes, it's fantastic!

Okay, in you go-

All right, here I come.

Rising like a phoenix

Skip the epitaph,

have the last laugh

-Hahaha

-Hahahaha

Swaying up with the bound,

fought through to be crown

Such heroics

Yes! Woo! I did it.

Opponents roll,

the truth be told... '

Look, there they are.

- Hey!

- Russell.

- Sweetie.

- Come here.

Man, it is good to be back.

What happens on the road,

stays on the road.

I missed you guys.

Looks like Mick

has the car ready.

What?

You're going with him?

- Yeah.

- But Dad, you just got back.

You missed my birthday.

And the Easter bunny.

Honey, this has gotten

out of hand.

All we ever wanted was to spend

more time together as a family,

and now,

we barely see you or Russell.

I... I know, but I'm doing

this for you guys. For us.

Okay, I promise,

just one more match,

and we'll retire after

Russell wins the title.

It's always best to go

out on top, right?

Come on, hang in there.

Please.

Nate!

- We've got to go.

- Mm-hmm.

Come on, Russell.

Let's go, buddy.

Hey, you can leave the monkey.

It's just a meet and greet.

I'll see you at home soon,

okay, Hunk?

I had plans anyway.

Got to alphabetize

my banana collection.

Love you guys!

Oh, yeah, Nate, I made

a little change of plan here.

I'm going to hold the title

match at the WUF arena.

Yeah, yours is too small

for an event this size.

Our Russell is way too big now.

Hey, Nate.

Hey, you listening?

Yeah. Yeah, okay.

Makes sense, Mick.

We made it...

It was so many...

people.

There were so...

I am so sorry. That took

a lot longer than I thought.

Everyone wanted a

picture with Russell.

That's okay.

Hunk's been keeping me company.

Phew, tag! You're in!

Talk about TMI.

I am just saying you better

have a blue box in your pocket.

Thanks, Hunk.

And I see you've

made my favorite meal.

Your grandmother's lasagna.

It might be

a little cold now, though.

Oh. Russell.

I missed you too.

They wanted to be the

waiter and the hostess tonight,

but they couldn't stay awake.

You're right.

Something needs to change.

Come with me.

Okay.

- What is this?

- And voila!

You had it restored? When?

I have my ways,

but let me tell you,

that is a lot heavier

than it looks.

Happy anniversary!

Welcome to the weigh-in for

tonight's championship fight.

That's 25 and a half

pounds of muscle...

- Yeah!

- ...for the tenacious terrier.

Next up, we are joined

by the current champion

Helix "The Hammer" Munroe

who will be fighting

Russell Maniac later tonight.

- Oh, wow.

- Wow, got a shot.

Hammer time.

Wow, The Hammer is exactly

ten times larger

than Russell Maniac!

A classic David

and Goliath story.

Yeah, if David was a dog

and Goliath was an ape.

How do

you see tonight going down?

First of all,

I'd just like to say

you're welcome.

To everyone.

You're all now better people

for having been

graced with my gravitas.

Well, it's good

to have confidence!

That I do.

And as for how tonight

is going to go down?

I am going to crush

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