Sailor Beware Page #3

Let go all gripes and boat chocks.

Remove reel covers,

raise boat clear of chocks,

belay the falls,

slack davit, guys, and...

Jones, repeat what I just said.

Word for word?

Every if, and, and but?

Start talking!

Muster crew,

remove cover and strongbacks.

Be sure the automatic plug is free.

Have painter forward

outboard of davits.

Let go of gripes and boat chocks,

remove reel cover.

Raise boat to clear chocks.

Belay the falls and slack davit, guys.

Stroke!

One, two, stroke!

That's it, men. Put your backs into it.

Stroke!

- Watch the head.

- Stroke.

Come on, I said, watch the head!

- Get it out of the way.

- Stroke.

You missed.

Stroke.

Jones.

Get the water out of that boat.

Aye, aye, sir.

Stroke.

Stroke.

Get the water out of the boat!

Get the water out of the boat!

Jones, I said,

get the water out of the boat!

Get the water out of the boat.

Get the water out of the boat.

One.

Two.

Stroke.

Put that plug back!

Aye, aye, sir.

- Jones, get the water out of that boat.

- Aye, aye, sir.

- Get the water out of the boat!

- Aye, aye, sir.

- Out of the boat.

- Aye, aye, sir.

Get the water...

At this point in your training,

you guys could figure on a big liberty,

but it don't look like

we're gonna get one on account

of the way a certain bluejacket

has been acting up.

What's this "certain bluejacket" stuff?

You afraid to mention his name?

No, I ain't. If the shoe fits, put it on.

There's no basis for metabolism.

Certainly I'm aware of the fact that

there are other men concerned here,

and you still can't feel that

a physical being is abstract.

You've got to base the full heart

and soul on the ingredient

that other people are aware of the fact

that physical being isn't even involved.

- Isn't that right?

- Why, you stupid, little...

- Which one of you guys is Crowthers?

- Here, sir.

Special Service would like you to sing

on the Tempting Kiss TV show today.

I've arranged for your liberty.

Thank you, sir, but I don't think it's fair

that I should take liberty

just because I can sing a song,

and the rest of the fellows

have to stay here

because a certain chief enjoys

taking liberty from a certain bluejacket.

All right, Crowthers.

Lardoski, give all of these men liberty,

if they can be ready in a half an hour.

- Are you on liberty, too?

- Uh-huh.

Gee, Hilda, I'm glad I met you.

- You know, I just thought of something?

- What?

What would happen if I get a call

to return to the base,

pack my equipment, board the ship, and

they sent me to Alaska or someplace?

I wouldn't forget you.

Well, I'll see that you don't.

Stick out your hand.

- Hey, you tied a square knot.

- I did?

I didn't even know I could do it.

Would you go into town with me?

Well, that'll keep you away

from the rest of the girls, won't it?

Uh-huh.

We better hurry.

I want you to hear Al sing.

What is this Tempting Kiss Lipstick?

Oh, that's the kind I use.

It doesn't smear or rub off.

You want to test it?

Here in the street, in front of everyone?

No!

Okay, test it.

- You're right, nothing happened.

- I'll say nothing happened.

Come on, we'll be late.

- Come on.

- All right.

Oh, here we are.

- Where are we going?

- Right here.

A television station?

They got a cathode tube and

a master oscillator that just won't quit.

Come on.

Thank you. Thank you.

Well, how are

all my kissable girls today?

Fine, Mr. Chubby.

We have a lot of fun here, don't we?

Yes, sir.

And today, today we're going to select

the most kissable girl in San Diego.

Now, what do you think of that, huh?

And the winner will receive

a Hellman mink coat,

a complete set

of Chapman bicycle tires,

an Ellington grease gun,

a 10-year supply

of Go Gettum Dog Food,

four Donavan wristwatches,

10 glorious days

at the Palm Garden Hotel in Honolulu

and a complete wardrobe by Edythe

for the lucky girl who gets the trip.

There's our sailor now.

- We've been waiting for you.

- Who, me? What did I do?

- Will you come up here, please?

- Oh, yeah.

Isn't he handsome, girls?

This is my pal, Al Crowthers.

He's supposed to sing on your program.

Here's our first guest, ladies,

Al Crowthers.

Take it away, Al. You'll accompany him?

- Oh, yeah. Where are we going, Al?

- We're not going anywhere, Melvin.

- He wants you to help me with my song.

- Oh, well, how?

I don't know. We haven't got

an orchestra. I don't know what to do.

- You want I should hum?

- No, no.

Got any other ideas?

Yeah, I have an idea.

- Oh, good. Go ahead, bring them up.

- Come on up, fellas.

Yeah, you play the piano, Fred.

Melvin.

Melvin.

I'll be too old to sing this number.

Now, hurry up.

Today

Tomorrow

Forever

You are the one girl I love

Today

Tomorrow

Forever

As long as stars shine above

The stars that shine

The stars that shine

The stars that shine

This is no mere infatuation

One, two, three, four

We love your voice, so sing some more

This time it's real

The sweet sensation

Always and always together

That's how it's fated to be

Today

Tomorrow

Forever

You are the one girl

For me

You are my one love

And now, ladies, don't you think

a sailor would make a perfect judge

for our Tempting Kiss contest?

Where's the handsome one?

Oh, well, you'll do.

We want you to be our judge.

You're going to be Mr. Temptation.

- Oh, no, you don't.

- He seems to be a little bit shy.

But we'll take care of that,

won't we, girls?

Can you imagine anyone being shy

who comes from...

Where'd you say you were from?

He's from Brooklyn!

Now, before our contest begins,

a word on behalf of our sponsor. We...

I didn't say Brooklyn.

We of the Tempting Kiss

Lipstick Company believe...

- I was born in Ottumwa, lowa.

- Ottumwa, lowa! Well...

Tempting Kiss Lipstick won't smear,

won't stain...

- Where were you born?

- Galesburg, Illinois.

All right. All right.

Tempting Kiss Lipstick comes in

three convenient sizes.

- You can get it in...

- Sheboygan, Wisconsin.

Now, please. You just go

right over there and sit down.

Will you, please? Just take a chair

for a minute. Right over there.

That's right. Thank you very much.

Our product is sold in the stubby,

the regular and in...

Irvington, New Jersey!

Harlan, Kentucky.

Quincy, Massachusetts.

Clearwater, Florida.

San Diego, California.

San Diego? That's my station.

I gotta get off of here.

Oh, no, you don't. No, you don't.

You're going to stay right here

and select the most kissable girl

in San Diego.

Now, remember, ladies, it's within

Mr. Temptation's power

to give any of you a mink coat

and 10 glorious days in Honolulu!

All right.

All right, now one contestant at a time,

please, one at a time.

Ready? Go!

One at a time, girls, one at a time!

One at a time!

Ladies, ladies, ladies!

Ladies, one at a time.

Oh, stop it, you stupid, old...

One at a time, girls!

One at a time!

Stop!

One at a time!

- Maybe he's in Studio 7.

- Try it. Try it.

I am Pierre. I am the top man.

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