Scent of a Woman Page #5

- This is Sofia, Charlie.

She's a magician

with a needle.

Sofia's workin' me up

a little "Glen Plaid" number,

and I've asked her if she'd

put something together for you.

- Uh, I don't need any clothes, Colonel.

- Standard issue...

for an upscale

urban assignment.

You don't like the clothes,

Charlie, on completion of duty,

you can give 'em away.

Juice, coffee, and other assorted

goodies on the trolley over there.

Get yourself up,

get yourself together !

?It's a great day

for singin' a song ?

?And it's a great day

for movin' along ?

?And it's a great day

from morning to night ?

?And it's

a great day ?

for everybody's plight.

[ Frank Chuckling ]

How are you feeling

today, Colonel ?

Super !

Superior !

Superfluous !

Young Sofie here

is working Thanksgiving...

because she's trying to

put herself through college.

I told her, "My young friend

Charlie's headed for college."

- Uh, excuse me.

- Where you goin' ?

- I-l need to use the phone.

- What's wrong with the phones in here ?

I don't want

to disturb you.

You're not disturbing me.

Make your call.

I'd kinda like

to be private.

Stay outta my room !

This is as private

as you're gonna get.

?But if you've got somethin'

that must be done ?

?And it can only

be done by one ?

Sofia...

what are the chances

of suitin' you up sometime ?

- [ Operator ] Sugarbush Lodge.

- George Willis, please.

- [ George ] Hello !

- George ! Hey, it's Charlie.

Hey, Chas. Next year you gotta

come up with us.

White powder on

a base of snow bunnies.

Chas,

are you there ?

Yeah, I'm here.

Um --

- you told me to call you for the moves.

- All right.

For now, the move's

no move:
status quo.

Everything's

the way we left it.

How did we leave it ?

See no evil,

hear no evil.

You know

what I mean, Chas ?

Yeah. See no evil,

hear no evil.

- Okay, then, walk like you talk !

- All right, good-bye.

- George Willis, huh ?

- Yeah.

George Willis.

That makes his father probably

George Willis, Senior.

Charlie, I ask ya,

what do you think Big George

is gonna feel about Little George...

seeing no evil,

hearing no evil ?

Well, we're not gonna

tell our parents.

We're just gonna keep it

between ourselves.

Oh, George isn't gonna tell

his father about this thing !

Damn decent of him.

Ooh ! Aw ! Hah !

- Scusi.

- Prego.

I love it

when you hurt me.

Uh, tell me now,

Charlie.

This, uh, George Willis, Junior,

what's his father do ?

I don't really know.

Well, I'm gonna tell ya.

When George Willis, Sr., isn't busy as a

million-dollar man for Aetna Casualty --

or is it New England Distributor

for the Chrysler Corporation ?

He concerns himself with his young son,

George Willis, Junior.

George isn't going

to say anything to his father.

Oh, Charlie.

Big George is gonna

wind up Little George,

and Little George is gonna sing

like a canary.

And if you're hip, kid,

you're gonna hop to, too.

You've got this

all figured out, don't you ?

It don't take no Young America merit

scholarship to figure this one out.

Charlie, you had a little life,

so you decided to go to Baird...

to put yourself in the market

for a big one.

Now, in order to stay

in the running,

you're gonna have to tell these people

what they want to know.

You think so ?

- Are we finished, Sofia ?

- Yes.

Grazie. Grazie.

Charlie,

if you don't sing now,

you're gonna end up,

not only shelving biscuits...

in some convenience store

in the Oregon burbs,

probably the last word you'll ever hear

yourself say just before you croak...

gonna be, "Have a nice day

and come back soon."

Sofia !

Measure up Charlie, pronto.

We got a date for Thanksgiving.

We got a date ?

My brother's place.

W.R. Slade,

White Plains, New York.

Colonel, I can't go with you

to your brother's place.

I mean, I should be

getting back to school.

Uh, well you gotta have

Thanksgiving somewhere.

I mean, eats and treats.

I could use the company.

All right.

D-Does he know I'm comin' ?

He doesn't know I'm comin'. But wait

till you see the look on his face...

when I walk through

the door.

Oh, he loves me !

Oh, uh, Charlie,

about your little problem,

there are two kinds of people

in this world:

those who stand up

and face the music,

and those who

run for cover.

Cover's better.

Okay, Sofia, suit 'im up !

Make him pretty !

Careful.

- Should I ring it ?

- Yeah.

Yes ?

Yes !

Who is this ?

- It's Randy.

- Randy ? You new ?

I'm your nephew.

Hah !

Here I am !

Your sister's been

hoarding me long enough.

- Thought it's time to spread

the riches around.

- Uncle Frank !

- Gloria !

- Gail.

Of course.

Say hello to the potluck

party from New York City.

Good old Uncle Frank and this here

with him is Charlie Simms,

star halfback of the

Baird football team.

They not only beat Exeter and Groton,

but Aquinas High School too.

Where's your

miserable father ?

Wait ! No, no.

Let's surprise him.

Give that fat heart

of his an attack. Willie !

Oh, Willie !

Hello, Frank.

- How you doin' ?

- Okay.

Here's my hand.

Charlie, meet W.R. Slade.

Nice to meet you, sir.

The original bulging

briefcase man.

Gretchen, I smell those prunes !

We talkin' Turkey Marbella ?

- Yes, we are.

- Whoo !

Let's have a whiff.

Come on.

You know, I always had a sneaker

for you. Come here.

[ Sniffing ]

Mmm.

Hah !

- Where are you, Garry ?

I heard you cough.

- Who are you again ?

I'm just here at the Waldorf-Astoria

with -- Is it your brother ?

W.R.'s final issue.

How ya doin' ?

- Yes. Who the hell are you ?

- I'm kinda takin' care

of him for the weekend.

Charlie !

Jesus !

Sorry. Where's the booze ?

Flowin' like mud here.

To tell the truth, the colonel's

not well, I don't think.

- Not well ?

- I think he's a little lonely.

Why didn't you take him

to your family's for dinner ?

I heard that !

I heard that.

Pay no attention to him.

That's his big-brother talk.

He's been watching out for me

since day one.

Bailed me out of more trouble...

than he'd like to remember.

- Hmm ?

- [ Gretchen ] Let me take your coat.

I meant to pick up some vino

on my way, but I blew it.

I'll send you the Rothschild

again for Christmas,

- only let's see how Thanksgiving goes.

- I'll set two more places.

- Here's your drink, Frank.

- Thank you, Randy.

Still with

Snow Queen sugar ?

Snow Flake. Why do you

always get that wrong ?

Because it's not important for me to

get it right. What are you doing there ?

I'm Vice President

for Marketing.

Whoo-ah ! Congratulations !

Sugar is sh*t, though.

I told General Abrams to install

honey in the commissaries.

If the K-50s didn't blow your brains

out, sugar, sure as sh*t, was gonna.

- Why don't we all sit down ?

- Ooh !

Mitsouki. Rhymes with nookie.

Be careful.

- When the wife gets restless,

the wife gets racy.

- Let's go and eat.

By all means.

Thank you, Charlie.

Where you wanna sit, Frank, or you gonna

arrange yourself at the head again ?

Rate this script:3.7 / 6 votes