Seems Like Old Times Page #9

---

We had it reshingled.

Now, uh, Anne,

you sit next to Stanley.

Fred, to my left. Deidre.

Then we, uh, have boy, girl,

boy, girl, governor, girl.

- Thank you, Fred.

- Oh, everything looks lovely.

- Oh, I love it.

- Thank you.

You don't be quiet, I'm gonna tie

your tails together! Now be quiet!

Come on! Come on, out of here.

Come on, come on.

Hey, Chet. What do you say?

Mrs. Parks in?

Yes, she's in. In with the Governor

of the city of California.

Oh, the gov's here? Good. Tell Mrs.

P I'm here, will you?

- Yeah, I will.

- Mmm-hmm.

Ira tells me you placed four more of

those probationers with jobs today.

Glenda, you realize

what you're doing?

By personally ending unemployment

and cutting the crime rate

you're doing away with the need for

a governor and an attorney general.

Well, then you can all come

work for me.

- All right.

- That's a deal.

I got good news

and I got bad news.

You're drunk,

aren't you, Chester?

That's the good news.

What's the bad news?

- Oh.

It's all right. It's nothing.

She had it last night.

She's hyperventilating.

- I just need some fresh air.

- I'll go with you.

No! Please I need

my own fresh air.

( Stay! )

She hasn't been sleeping well.

- Oh.

- Oh, of course.

I hope they shoot you. I hope

they shoot you in my kitchen.

And when they drag your

dead body out,

I hope they shoot you again.

Is that anyway to talk to a man

- who's decided

to give himself up.

What?

I can't stand

being a fugitive anymore.

The hardest part

is finding a bathroom.

You'll surrender?

My conscience is bothering me

and I began to think of

Well, how unfair all of this

is to you and Myron and

- Ira.

- Ira.

I guess, if I was gonna put myself in

anyone's hands, it'd be yours, Glenda.

I love these hands.

Soft and delicate and yet

Strong and firm.

Some nights, I thought

they'd rip my back apart.

I'm glad that you've come

to your senses, Nick.

We had something good.

We had something real.

We had something permanent.

We had something that couldn't

be destroyed by a little thing

like you marrying somebody else.

Oh Uh

Why don't you wait here and

I'll go in and I'll get Myron?

- Ira.

- Ira!

Uh Ni Um, Nick

No! No, no. You mustn't, Nick.

Don't do this.

We're in the middle of soup.

Oh

- Tell me you miss the fun.

- I don't.

- The laughs.

- I don't.

- The pizzas in the bathtub.

- I don't.

- The ice cubes in the bed.

- I don't.

I don't! I love Ira.

I've never been more content.

Content?

Content isn't excitement.

Content is content.

- You know what you used to do

every time I came near you?

You used to shake and quiver.

That's what you're doing

right now.

You're shaking and quivering

all over.

Uh-huh, that's because I'm up

against the refrigerator.

I want you back, Glenda.

If you don't wanna leave Ira I

can handle it. I'm not selfish.

We can share our time with you.

I'm out of town a lot anyway.

Nick, Nick You're, you're

getting me all confused.

I can't handle

a lunatic ex-husband,

and six people for dinner

at the same time, please.

- I'm gonna kiss you now.

- No.

- One kiss.

- No.

You tell me after that kiss that

every things dead between us,

I'll never darken

your lips again.

No kiss, Nick. I'm a married woman

with the Governor in sight.

No kisses please.

You won't have to tell me. I'll see it

in your eyes, I'll feel it in your body.

Should something occur to you

however, don't be afraid to speak up.

- Excuse me, they want their chicken now.

- Uh

- He just surrendered to me.

- Mmm-hmm.

I just came to kiss

everybody goodbye.

Uh, you wait here,

drink coffee. I'll get Hyram.

Myron.

Myron.

Ira, uh, to come in, and you

can surrender to him formally.

To Ira

It'll look good

for the Governor.

Well, Chet, I think

this calls for a drink.

I'll call for one.

Sorry I took so long.

- I'm fine.

You don't look all right.

Yes, I do.

Don't I look all right?

- She looks fine to me.

- I think she looks all right.

She looks gorgeous.

She does? How does

she look to you, Fred?

Fine.

Tell me the truth. Am I drunk?

You passed cold about two minutes ago.

Can you serve?

I don't think so.

I can drive but I can't serve.

Oh, you can do it, Chet. You just

have to get through the chicken.

I can't even get

through the door?

Well, you just hold out your hands.

I'll give you the serving dish.

I'm getting sick.

If I smell that pepperoni sauce.

They're gonna get a cleaning

bill from the Governor.

Stand up, Chester.

Hold out your hands.

Okay, here we go.

Pretty good.

Timing's a little off.

Well, what I'd like to do is

have a meeting in Sacramento,

the first week in June

with our entire team,

and try to coordinate some of the things

we've been talking about tonight.

I look forward to that, Stanley.

Would you like more chicken?

More? We haven't had any.

I meant, any more.

Why don't you

ring the bell, honey?

You know, Fred and I have

drawn up a ten point program

that encompasses most of those

issues you're concerned with.

Good.

In so many areas, you know, the

criminal code system is so antiquated.

IRA:
And it take

mountains of man-hours

to deal with issues that could

be handled in the lower courts,

in one fiftieth

the amount of time.

Thank you, Chester.

Stanley

You okay?

Chester

Holy sh*t

I beg your pardon, Governor.

What's wrong with everyone?

Nothing, Stanley.

Everything's fine.

Ira, uh, Fred, it's all right.

Trust me. It's all right.

What's all right?

The chicken, sir.

The chicken's all right.

Would you mind holding this

just for one brief second?

Let's get that for you.

I'll get you this breast

right up here.

I think you'll enjoy this.

- Thank you.

- You're welcome.

You look familiar.

Were you here the last time?

Oh, I've been here

quite often lately, sir.

My name's Nicholas.

Beautiful choice.

- Thank you, Nicholas.

- You're very welcome, ma'am.

- Sorry.

Where's Chester?

Uh, he's out for a moment.

Well, it smells terrific.

What should I do, Ira?

About what?

The chicken. Um

Fred is a vegetarian,

and doesn't know

if he should eat it.

So, why ask Ira?

Uh, Ira Ira used

to be a vegetarian,

and knows the things

you should eat.

Eat the chicken, Fred.

Mmm.

It's tangier than last time.

And very spicy. I like that.

Oh, thank you, sir. It's a little

thing I picked up in Mexico.

Perhaps a little more sauce?

No, thank you. I'm fine.

But, Nicholas,

you certainly look familiar.

You've never served me before?

No, sir. I voted for you last time.

Maybe that was it.

- Thank you.

I remember the reason

must've been

That'll be all, Nicholas.

- Go away.

You know, I would never

take him for a butler.

I wouldn't either.

You always seem to come up with

such interesting help, Glenda.

Where did you find him?

Oh, I've had him for years.

Would you all excuse me

for a moment?

Would you all excuse me

for a moment?

Would you all excuse me

for a moment?

Peculiar time to go the john.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes