Send Me No Flowers Page #2

Synopsis: At one of his many visits to his doctor, hypochondriac George Kimball mistakes a dying man's diagnosis for his own and believes he only has about two more weeks to live. Wanting to take care of his wife Judy, he doesn't tell her and tries to find her a new husband. When he finally does tell her, she quickly finds out he's not dying at all (while he doesn't) and she believes it's just a lame excuse to hide an affair, so she decides to leave him.
Genre: Comedy, Drama, Romance
Director(s): Norman Jewison
Production: MCA Universal Home Video
  1 win & 1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
7.0
Rotten Tomatoes:
57%
APPROVED
Year:
1964
100 min
798 Views


William Mallone's?

Yes, I've been worried about him.|He's getting on in years.

What does|the cardiogram show, Dr. Peterson?

What?

Oh, that's really a shame.

But, still, what can you do?|Give him a few pills

to ease the pain in his chest.

Not much you can do|when the old ticker goes, eh?

How much time do you figure he's got,|Doctor? Few weeks.

Yes, I've seen them go just like that.

No, I'm not going to tell him.|I think he's better off not knowing.

Alright.

Fine, you have a nice weekend too,|Doctor. Bye-bye.

I'm back, Ralph.|- Good.

Do you still want me to take these|pills? - Yes, to ease your chest pain.

Ralph?

Do you mind|if I ask you some questions?

Not at all, go ahead.|- Well,

suppose you had a patient

and found out|he only had a few weeks to live.

I mean, he could go just like that.

Would you tell him?|- Well, offhand I would say, but

it'd all depend on the circumstances.|- Circumstances? - Yes.

If I knew the man's affairs|were in order, his will made out,

his insurance paid up, no loose ends,|well, I'd see no reason to tell him.

Well, suppose he were an old friend,|like me.

Are your affairs in order,|will made out, insurance paid up?

The I wouldn't tell you. Anything else|I can do for you, George?

Goodbye, Mr. Kimball.

See you in church!

Judy?|Yeah?

Come on, we're teeing off at 2:30.|- Just a second. - What are you doing?

Making George's sleeping pills.|- What are you, a pharmacist?

I'm a very smart wife.|You know George.

He's convinced he can't sleep|without a pill, but I know it's sugar.

And it works? - It has for 5 years.|You know something else?

When he takes two|he goes to sleep twice as fast.

That's a story for a medical journal!|- That'd ruin everything. - Why?

He reads it every week.|- Oh, no!

Hi, George.|- Hello, Arnold.

Ruth is flying to her mother's,|the kids are in camp, and I'm alone.

And unafraid.

What are you doing?|- Eating.

Nuts? George Kimball? Cholesterol?

What's the matter?|You seem kind of down.

Arnold, can I take you into my|confidence? - You can, George.

Well,|I've just heard some rather bad news.

You've got to promise to keep quiet.|I wouldn't want it to get around.

It's nothing that's going to|affect property values, is it?

No, I wouldn't think so.

That's a relief. What, then?

You know this little pain in my chest|I've been complaining about?

You mean your indigestion?|- Well, it's not indigestion.

No?

It's curtains, Arnold.

Curtains?

What do you mean, "curtains"?|- I just came from the doctor's.

He only gives me a few weeks to live.|- Oh, come on!

I don't believe it.|- It's true. It's the ticker.

Holy cow!

Are they sure?

I had Peterson,|the biggest cardiologist in the city.

Holy cow!

Gee, George,|I don't know what to say.

This is so sudden, you...

George, I...|I believe I better have a drink.

I'd like to have one with you,|if you don't mind.

Certainly not.

I'd like a martini.|- Same. Double.

George?|- What?

How are you going to tell Judy?|- Judy?

Oh, I'm not going to tell her. - No?|- No. I couldn't bear it.

She'd probably go to pieces,|all that weeping and wailing.

You know Judy. - Yeah, I remember|how she was when the dog died.

I don't mean there'd be a comparison.|This would be much worse.

You know what I mean.

Of course, Arnold.|- George, is there anything I can do?

Not as a lawyer, but as|your best friend. - I don't know.

Somebody has to|take care of the funeral details.

Do you want to do that?|- I'll do it.

I'll do it.

What's the matter with him?|- It's so nice to see you.

It's good to see you, George.

How is everything?|- Everything's just fine.

That's wonderful, wonderful.

Hi, Arnold. - Hi.|- Ruth get off alright?

Like a rocket.|- Good.

How are you, Judy?

What are you taking,|George's vitamin pills?

Dear, I want you to know you can|always count on me. - Thanks, Arnold.

I think we should drive Arnold home.|He can pick up his car tomorrow.

Judy, do you know|what type of man you're married to?

Thinking of the other guy, even at|a time like this. - A time like this?

He means, at a time when|he forgets where he parked his car.

You can ride with us, Arnie. Come on.

That was brilliant.

Come on, Arnold.

Judy, I just wanted to tell you,|I live right next door, alright?

Right, Arnold. - If you need me|for anything, day or night,

that's where I'll be, right next door.

Thanks a lot, Arnold.

Oh, was he bombed.|What's he had to drink?

Hello, Mrs. Kimball. For you|we put it through special.

That is something! Almost as wild|as this morning's outfit, huh?

Bye, now.

Pretty fresh kid.|- Oh, he's just friendly.

Friendly? Bet he makes out|pretty good in this neighborhood.

Oh, darling? Joe at the gas station|gave me back this check.

He said it's the wrong amount|and I should make out a new one.

The bill was 45.58 and,|I don't know why, but I wrote 78.60.

The figure's not $78.60, it's 7-8-6-0.|You paid your license plate!

You're kidding. That's an odd one.

Now, anybody can make a mistake...|- I'd like to talk to you. Judy?

How would you like|to go to night school?

Where? - Night school.|Just a couple of nights a week.

To learn banking,|bookkeeping, a little accounting.

That's just... Why? - Because|these things keep our ship afloat.

For example:
What does|"amortization of a mortgage" mean?

I don't care.|- But you've got to care.

That's your department.|- But it's important for you to know.

Why should we both know the|same things? - Judy, please.

Will you let me get dinner going?|- That's what I want to talk about.

How much is a pound of ham?|- I don't know, I didn't buy a pound.

How much did you buy? - A half pound.|- How much was it?

If I don't know that either.

How do you know they're not cheating|you, if you don't know the prices?

Would you tell me why you're|getting so worked up about ham?

It's not just ham,|it's the whole principle.

George, you didn't lose your job?|- No, I didn't lose my job.

I'll have it the rest of my life.|- Then what are you worried about?

You better check on Arnold.|See if he wants to have dinner, huh?

We can eat in half an hour.

What does "amortization" mean?

Hindus had the right idea. When|the husband died, the wife went too.

Threw herself on the funeral pyre.|And he didn't have to worry about her.

I've been thinking, and|I want to do this, so don't say no.

Fact is, I consider it a privilege.|- What? - I want to deliver a eulogy.

That'd be fine. - And don't worry,|I'll give you one gorgeous send-off.

I'm sure you will. Just wish|I could be around to hear it.

Maybe I can knock out|a rough draft before you go.

You know something, Arnold?|Judy will never make alone.

Look at it this way, George:

Judy's young, she's attractive,|she'll probably get married again.

I'm sorry,

I shouldn't say a thing like that,|with you not gone yet.

It's alright, Arnold.

Of course it's a possibility.|Judy might get married again.

Suppose she married the wrong man,|like poor Janet Hart. Remember her?

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Julius J. Epstein

Julius J. Epstein (August 22, 1909 – December 30, 2000) was an American screenwriter, who had a long career, best remembered for his screenplay – written with his twin brother, Philip, and Howard E. Koch – of the film Casablanca (1942), for which the writers won an Academy Award. It was adapted from an unpublished play, Everybody Comes to Rick's, written by Murray Bennett and Joan Alison. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Send Me No Flowers" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 4 Oct. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/send_me_no_flowers_17772>.

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