Senior Project Page #6
- Year:
- 2014
- 85 min
- 143 Views
That's why you got me, man.
Andy's in the house.
I'm here to help you,
and look, boom, film you.
Close-up. close-up.
Oh. [ laughs ]
peter:
um, yeah.Oh, that's right, your film.
Andy:
yeah, come on, man.
[ whistle blows ]
um, um...
Rolling sound!
All right, set dressing.
Wardrobe.
Your hair -- hair is --
I mean, it looks good.
All right, here we go.
Ready?
And action!
Peter:
uh, hey.My name is peter hammer.
My senior project
is on deceptive coloration
for the sake
of self-preservation.
While they have
brilliant coloring,
nudibranches are famous
for their disposable penises
which allow them to have sex
more frequently.
Andy:
wait, disposable penis?I got to -- I got to see this.
Look at this.
Penis. say it with me.
Penis.
Peter:
I don't have the penis with me.
Natalia:
peter!Shut that camera off before
I shove it down your throat.
Peter:
whoa. natalia, relax.
You're gonna pop a blood vessel.
Natalia:
did you see that picture?
I looked awful.
Peter:
it really wasn't that bad.
Natalia:
no, no, it was.It was humiliating.
And you know
what the worse part is?
Peter:
dropping two letter grades?
Natalia:
no. that I already booked
the performing arts center
for the show,
so it's happening
regardless of her stupid rules.
Why does she have to ruin
my life
just because she's bitter
about hers?
Peter:
what are you talking about?
Natalia:
well, legend has itthat ms. ghetty had the nerve
to ask out the hottest guy
at kennedy.
She weighed like 250 pounds.
She was a total shamu.
I checked her yearbook picture.
Oh, no offense, andy.
Andy:
oh, it's okay.I'm not a -- I'm not a whale.
I'm a human, it's -- just --
peter:
did you guys know that --
that ms. ghetty
has these weird pictures
of animals humping each other
in her office?
It's really weird.
Andy:
oh, breaking news!Oh, my god!
She is into beastiality.
I knew it, I knew it.
I'm not surprised.
I'm not surprised.
Natalia:
okay, andy, the camera.
[ whistle blows ]
sam:
is that the flailing monkey?
Spencer:
happy baby pose, actually.
Sam:
huh. close.Spencer:
so what can I help you with?
[ chuckles ]
sam:
I was thinking of throwing,like, a get-together party thing
at my place.
Spencer:
really?The square peg
wants to throw a party?
Sam:
my parents are out of towntill wednesday.
Spencer:
so what are you thinking?
Tom cruise,
"risky business" style?
Sam:
no, I was thinking moreof like a senior/truce party.
Spencer:
a senior/truce party.Never heard of one.
Sam:
it could bea peace offering with natalia.
And I was thinking you and I
could co-host it together.
Spencer:
I mean...okay.Little weird, but sure.
What do I have to do?
Sam:
can you score some booze?
Spencer:
oh, yeah, easily.
My dad's got a stockpile
in the kitchen.
Sam:
really?I thought he was, like,
a conservative politician
or something.
Spencer:
oh, he is.Sam:
it's not a dateor anything weird like that.
It's just two friends
co-hosting a party together.
You're gay, right?
Spencer:
yes. absolutely.
Sam:
okay, sorry about that.Continue.
-spencer:
it's all good.-sam:
all right.Spencer:
I'll see you at the party.
Sam:
find your inner chi or whatever.
Spencer:
thank you. namaste.
Sam:
spicy tuna roll.
Eva:
excuse me.Jill:
hi.Eva:
uh, can I help you?
Jill:
hi, hello, yes.I was just in the neighborhood
collecting signatures
from all the residents.
Eva:
a signature for what?
Jill:
oh, well, we are --we're trying to recall
the mayor.
-eva:
really?-jill:
yes, yes.Yes, apparently,
he has been groping ladies
-at the senior center.
-eva:
uh-huh.Jill:
and we need like, pbbt,20,000 signatures
by the end of the week
to get him run out of office.
Is mr. peter hammer available?
Eva:
no, I'm sorry.He's not.
Plus, he's not of age to vote
or sign anything.
Jill:
so maybe just his father then.
Eva:
I'm sorry,we're not together anymore,
plus we're not even
the homeowners of this property.
Jill:
you're not?Eva:
no, my son and Ijust live here.
I am the housekeeper.
Jill:
oh.Okay.
I have to go
get more signatures,
so I will thank you.
And, uh, go, women's rights!
Eva:
strange.Peter:
sam.Come on.
Talk to me.
Ms. ghetty:
I know it's not right.
I know it's --
I know it's not perfect.
I wanted to say that you look
really handsome tonight.
Well, here's to us.
[ smooches ]
[ knock on door ]
jill:
ms. ghetty?Ms. ghetty!
[ panting ]
I have news.
Ms. ghetty:
oh. what --what is this? What are you --
what -- who are you?
-jill:
oh.-ms. ghetty:
oh!-jill:
see?-ms. ghetty:
jill.Jill:
one, peter hammeris not who he says he is.
He's not a millionaire,
but a housekeeper's son.
Ms. ghetty:
[ gasps ]oh, that is delicious.
What else do you know?
Jill:
there's gonna bea party tonight --
with alcohol.
Ms. ghetty:
[ gasps ]natalia:
I have the same fridge.
[ beep ]
hello, mr. fridge.
Female voice:
hello, master.
Natalia:
[ chuckles ]that is so funny.
See, this is why
we get along so well.
We like the same things.
Peter:
um, I'm gonna get dressedfor the party.
Natalia:
okay.First official party together.
[ chuckles ]
'cause I got to skate
I be showing up
late to the class
Uh, hello. I'm andy.
[ chuckles ]
uh, today is, uh, may 2nd.
Location -- at samantha's house
on breckenridge lane,
and, as you know, graduation
is right around the corner,
so everyone's all crazy.
But luckily,
we find ourselves today
at an underground raging party.
Mm, mm, mm, mm. mm!
[ chuckles ]
so, you know, some couples
are hoping to get "lucky,"
but let's just be real.
Half of 'em are gonna leave
in heartbreak, in tears,
or else they're not
gonna leave at all.
They're gonna wake up here
and not know what happened.
Yo! You good, man?
Young man:
I'm not gonna graduate!
Andy:
man!This is your third time
not graduating
with your failing ass.
All right.
All right, sorry about that.
Okay.
[ clears throat ]
here we go, follow me.
I will show you
how we do it over here.
Let's go.
Hello, ladies.
Can I please get a kiss
for andy?
Aw, you love kissing andy.
Andy will kiss you back.
Young man:
hey, let's play house.
You guys be the door,
and I'll slam you.
Huh? Upstairs?
[ laughter ]
all right.
Spencer:
you know, you couldjust pretend that I'm peter.
Sam:
what?Why would I have to do that?
I'm so comfortable right now.
Are you not comfortable?
Are you uncomfortable?
'cause I'm comfortable.
I'm real --
spencer:
chill, it's fine.I'm comfortable.
I'm wearing flip-flops.
It's all good.
Sam:
huh, right.Spencer:
so when are you doingyour fashion show?
-sam:
uh, I booked the gym.-spencer:
mm.-sam:
mm-hmm, yeah.-spencer:
that's a good venue.Sam:
yeah, it works.It's luxurious enough.
Andy:
oh, and nowfor the main attraction.
Sam:
what are you talking about?
Ah, you guys came together.
Natalia:
yeah, couldn't down
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"Senior Project" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 20 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/senior_project_17777>.
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