Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No! Page #6

---

Canada to the Carolinas

continues to be downright

apocalyptic,

with a massive low-pressure

trough dominating the region.

Gilbert, I got your message. Are

you crazy?

Brian "Jonesy" Jones, NASA

Administrator, meet my son

Finlay.

Mr. Shepard, heard a lot about

you.

The Colonel can't stop talking

about you.

Can't?

Look, I passed your message

on to the White House.

Everything's fine, but...

But what? We're not ready.

Look, we've only got

Independence

at the 80% fuel capacity level,

and you're gonna use that to

dissipate the storm,

and that means pfft. I

understand that.

That's why I'm going on this

mission alone.

No, we're going alone.

No, we're not. You heard what he

said.

It may not work. Now, you're

gonna be a new dad.

I can handle this myself.

It might not work is exactly why

I have to go.

What do you know about

sharknadoes?

Why do you always have to be the

hero?

I'm gonna take your dad so we

can prep the shuttle.

This is gonna be one hell of a

father and son road trip.

Sir, the sharknado wall will hit

the coast in 10 minutes.

Okay, team, listen up!

I know this is a last-minute

call-up,

but you are the ones to pull

this off.

I'm counting on you to complete

the countdown process

and launch Independence. You'll

be fine.

SUPERVISOR:
The fate of the

entire east coast depends on it.

Now get to work.

Colonel, there's a thousand

things that can go wrong.

Ted, I don't think we have a lot

of choices, huh?

This is a Hail Mary at most.

I'm not gonna risk other

peoples' lives with our plan.

It's gonna be me and my son.

That's it, me and my son.

About that, he's not prepared.

He's never even flown the sim.

Not open for discussion.

Gilbert, listen.

I know you helped design the

flight systems,

but this isn't a simulator.

You've never actually flown a

shuttle.

Nobody has ever flown it though

a sharknado before.

I'm as qualified as anyone.

Just promise you'll be careful,

and keep her in one piece.

For this to work, we gotta blast

off

at the right moment and find a

hole in the wall.

[ sighs ] I don't think being

careful is an option, guys.

The shuttle would never make it

through that wall.

Not to mention the sharks.

You're all set, astronaut

Shepard.

I'm not an astronaut. That's my

dad's gig.

Heh. You're going out in space,

aren't you?

Yeah. Last I checked,

those were the only

requirements.

And don't worry about

all that Buck Rogers stuff they

talk about.

Not as hard as they make it

seem.

Computers do most of the work.

It's not space I'm worried

about.

It's the sharks.

Maybe the sharks will help with

the aliens.

Aliens?

[ laughs ]

I'm just kidding.

You good to go? Yeah.

Safe flight. Thanks.

The wall is hitting the coast in

five minutes!

Hey, there's a fighter on the

airstrip out there.

I'll try to clear it up for you.

Don't go being a hero, Nova.

Oh, you're the only one who can

take risks?

Anyway, your dad sent me to give

this to you.

I think he has a crush on me.

I made some modifications of my

own.

Thank you.

Mm-hmm.

Hey, um, I've been meaning to

tell you,

I think you're gonna make a

great father this time.

Just don't die, okay?

I'll work on that.

You take care of yourself now.

I always do.

Director Regina, the sharknado

wall is moving in.

Prep status?

We're ready to go!

Oh, hey.

You're really lucky.

You guys are a great family.

Thank you.

It's kind of crazy, huh?

Can't believe Fin's going up in

that shuttle.

He's what?

He didn't tell you yet?

No!

[Elevator dings]

The Sharknado wall is going to

hit! Let's move it, people!

We gotta get them in the air

now!

Independence, Control.

We have to get you in the air

now.

You won't be able to launch if

the wall reaches you.

Okay!

Fin! Fin, stop!

Hey, what are you doing here?

Get back down to Mission

Control!

You're not getting on that

shuttle.

You're coming back with me!

That's not an option!

Are those sharks falling?

They're gonna hit the shuttle!

Shouldn't we stop the launch?

No, we'll send the National

Guard

to protect the shuttle.

I can't believe you're doing

this,

and you didn't even tell me!

Because I knew you would talk me

out of it.

COLONEL:
Son, we gotta go now.

My mom was right. About what?

That you don't know how to stop

being a hero.

This isn't about being a hero.

This is about us. This is about

our family.

Have you seen what's going on

outside?

These storms, they just keep

getting bigger!

Every shark in the world must be

flying around out there.

If I can do this, maybe we get

some peace.

I'm coming back,

and when I do, I'm never gonna

leave you again.

Promise?

COLONEL:
Fin, get up here now!

I promise.

I love you.

Come on.

Fin!

April!

Give me your hand!

Come on.

We're at 30 seconds and

counting.

The National Guard has arrived.

Put yourself in front of the

shuttle.

Don't let any sharks hit it.

Open fire!

Not one shark gets back to the

shuttle!

[ gunfire ]

Come on!

Colonel Shepard, We're about to

initiate the launch sequence.

Copy? Colonel Shepard?

COLONEL:
Fin! They're starting

the countdown!

Come on, we've got to get you

suited up!

Hurry up! Get in the chair, and

buckle up!

We're now at T minus 10.

Welcome aboard, son!

8, 7...

Helmets on.

T-They're not gonna make it.

5, 4... They're not gonna make

it!

LAUNCH DIRECTOR:
Abort! Abort!

Sir, are we launching?

We can't.

The wall is too thick.

FIN:
We need to make a hole in

the wall.

APRIL:
I think we need Nova. All

right.

FIN:
Mission Control, find Nova!

Are you okay?

I'm not good, but save yourself.

You're too late for me. Get out

of here!

More sharks! Sharks!

[ gun clicks ] I'm out of

bullets.

There's no time for makeup, man!

Get out of here!

Trust me, they are real.

.75 caliber mascara.

SOLDIER:
Mascara shotgun.

You owe me one, Fin.

I've got visual on the shuttle.

[ screams ]

Starting spiral heat now!

Are you crazy? We can't go out

there.

Yes, we can. Let's go.

COLONEL:
She's clearing the

path.

NOVA:
It's working! Get ready to

launch.

Are we back on for launch? Yep.

You guys are clear to launch! Go

now!

Everybody ready?

Visors down.

What are you doing out here?

Thought you could use some help!

You're crazy! Get back inside!

Let's go!

Get down!

Help me!

Go grab a gun!

Gun? What do I do with this

thing?

Shoot it!

Shoot it? If I can hold it.

[ fires ] Whaah!

How are you so good at that?

I'm a Shepard!

Don't worry, son.

It's like riding a bike.

Not any bike I ever rode.

I didn't want our first date to

be like this!

Rather we watched a movie!

Eating popcorn!

Talking about our hobbies!

What do you like to read?

Sci-fi! Watch out!

I'm so sorry I got you into

this!

There's no more bullets!

I'm out! So am I!

[ yells ] Come on! Let's go!

Come on! They're gonna launch.

We need to get inside.

9, 8, 7, 6...

Go for main engine start.

5, 4, 3,

2, 1, and liftoff!

Space shuttle Independence...

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes