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Shotgun Wedding Page #2
- UNRATED
- Year:
- 2013
- 92 min
- 759 Views
Raise it up, raise it up,
raise it up
He's not that good.
- [ Continues, Indistinct ]
- [ All ]
Yay!
We made it.
Last stop.
What is the damage,
my friend?
Sixty-five.
- [ Ted ] Sixty-five.
farther from civilization?
[ Maid Of Honor ]
Hey, guys!
Hey, hey!
Wait for me!
We're down to Pensee.
[ Chuckling ]
Hey, did everybody see
my pearl necklace?
[ All Shushing ]
Where are we going?
[ Rock On Stereo ]
I love you.
They love each other.
[ Chuckles ]
Stop it!
Camera guy!
Listen! Listen!
This is where we live.
You'll see Mika
with our camera.
She can see us.
Look at this. Hello!
Oh!
Aim for the rim.
Aim for the rim.
[ All Cheering ]
Pretty hungry--
Hey!
You guys ever feel
like every day is, like--
Like every day is like
trying to get...
a f***in' cashew
in the hat.
[ All Chanting ]
Vows! Vows! Vows! Vows! Vows!
"I, Robert,
take you, Rosemary,
to be
in sickness and in health,
in richness and in poorness--
hopefully more richness
than poorness"--
[ Pensee ]
Hey-oh!
"good hair days
and bad hair days,
when you're looking
smoking hot...
and on those occasions
when maybe you're feeling
a little bloated"--
[ Pensee ]
Whoa! Oh, hell, no!
[ Ted ]
jokes in your vows, man.
[ All Talking At Once ]
No, guys.
Rosemary thinks I'm funny.
She likes it when I'm funny.
But not when you're
supposed to be pledging
your undying love and fidelity.
Yeah, man.
They're really terrible.
[ Pensee ]
She'll hate it,
and then she'll hate you.
[ Ted ]
You should take
another pass on 'em, seriously.
[ Pensee ]
They're really immature.
All right. Tomorrow.
Tomorrow I'll fix 'em.
[ Man ]
You're already-- [ Indistinct ]
[ Robert ] Hey, listen.
You been here all night, man.
You can go home if you want.
I can go?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[ Pensee ]
Three-way!
[ Laughing ]
[ Indistinct ]
[ Pensee ]
Yay!
[ All Laughing, Shouting ]
[ Pensee ]
It's okay. It's okay.
Everything's gonna be just--
[ Laughs ]
Dong-dong, dong-dong,
dong-dong, dong-dong
[ Man ]
We're standing in puke.
[ Pensee ]
I wrote "dong" on his face.
[ Laughing ]
Room for one more!
I'm coming.
I've never felt so alive.
Here. Two guys.
Good old time.
And the groomsman.
Rosemary is so cool
and hot.
Oh, man, thanks.
And rich.
Thanks, man.
Rich in tits!
[ Burbling ]
[ Chuckles ]
Yeah.
[ Robert ]
Protect the home base.
This is our land!
I was on fire today.
Never even shot a gun before.
[ Robert ]
That's beginner's luck.
[ Laughs ]
Your best score
tied my worst score. What?
Oh, yeah?
Pull.
Nailed it again.
Can't miss.
Wait. What are you guys
talking about?
Skeet shooting.
Pensee, it's the middle
of the night. We can't--
I'm the groom.
We can do
what we want.
Whoa!
Come on!
[ Pensee ]
It's time to go
and shoot something.
I don't know what it is.
[ Ted ]
Love murder!
[ Robert ]
Okay.
[ Pensee ] Yeah.
Shh, shh, shh.
Shh!
It's like a--
Pensee, quiet.
I didn't say anything!
Pensee, quiet.
You be quiet!
You're talking.
I wasn't.
Okay. No more talking.
[ Chuckles ]
You wanna hold it?
Yeah, I do.
Touch it.
What was that?
You want me to shoot you?
Follow me.
[ Shotgun C*cks ]
[ Chuckles ]
All right. You ready?
Yeah, I'm ready.
Are you ready-ready?
I'm ready.
You ready-ready-ready?
Are you ready?
[ Pensee ]
I'm ready.
Okay.
Okay. Pull!
[ Gunshot ]
Oh! Slam!
[ Chattering ]
[ Blaze ]
They didn't invite me to this?
F***in' a**holes, man.
[ Robert ]
You did.
I did.
[ Groans ]
Well, that's why I think
it's too easy.
I need something harder.
Take three paces,
turn around
and then try to shoot it.
Three paces, turn around--
Turn around.
Fire. No looking.
No look-sees.
Hello, lovelies.
You are about
to see me shoot a gun.
For the very first time. Ever.
[ Robert ]
Okay. Pull it.
Ever!
Robert, no!
[ Blaze ]
Oh, sh*t! Oh, no!
[ Ted ] F***!
Pensee? Pensee?
[ Blaze ]
F***!
Are you okay?
in the face.
[ Ted ] What do we do?
Do we move her? Call someone?
Call the police?
Oh, my God.
Who do you call when you
shoot someone in the face?
Someone's been shot. Oh.
We need to call
a paramedic, right?
Don't touch your face.
Yes, I'll do it.
Oh, boy.
We need help. 911.
We need help.
Someone's been shot.
It's gonna take too long.
Listen. My mom-- Side room
right over there, okay?
She's a nurse.
She's a school nurse,
dude!
She's still a nurse, Ted!
I'm so sleepy.
Pensee! Get up!
Look at this weirdy.
Look at this weirdo.
Do not fall asleep.
There she is.
[ Giggles ]
[ Chattering ]
[ Pensee ]
I did it.
Guys, where am I?
What kind of ding-a-lings shoot
guns in the middle of the night?
You're getting married tomorrow.
Mom, she just got shot
in the face.
You can yell at me later.
What do you think, Mom?
We should call 911.
Right, Mom?
Uh-- No, no, no.
Now hold on.
Yeah?
This is mostly swelling.
Oh.
Yeah.
We just need to clean her up
and she'll be right as rain.
I still get to be
maid of honor, right?
Oh. Oh--
Let's take her
to the emergency room.
Come on. Let's go
to the emergency room.
You listen to me,
Robert Allen Fletcher.
I-- I do understand
what is happening here.
I will not allow
my baby's wedding
to get derailed...
by a-- by a...
simple accident.
Do you think that Judge Milton
will want to pay for
a second wedding...
because you shot his daughter's
adorable maid of honor
in the face?
This is not important,
is it?
I mean, this is just
some big fancy wedding.
This is Pensee's life.
We can--
Rosemary and I,
we can go to Vegas.
We can marry in Vegas.
It doesn't matter.
I was in labor
for 32 hours with you.
Thirty-two hours.
With no drugs.
And I wanted the drugs!
But I said no, for you.
I did not go through that
so you could have a wedding...
performed by some Elvis
or some ordained drag queen.
What if Rosemary
isn't okay with that?
What if she
changes her mind?
[ Ted ]
Yvette's right. Yvette's right.
This is more important.
This is the turning point
of your entire life.
What the f***
is wrong with you two?
Pensee, dear.
You understand, right?
You don't want to be the reason
that the whole wedding
gets called off.
Oh, my gosh. Do you?
No! No! I really don't.
I'm so sorry my face got in
front of your bullets, Robert.
Those guns
don't shoot bullets.
It's a bird shot.
...stupid!
This is not your fault.
You are not stupid.
[ Yvette ]
Shut up, Robert.
This is Pensee's decision,
not yours.
And she's on my side.
Ted, get him out of here.
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"Shotgun Wedding" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 30 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/shotgun_wedding_18055>.
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