Sick Of It All Page #7

You get them back

in their warrior, okay.

You get them to reclaim

their warrior.

Justice was served,

this time.

-You guys are lucky.

-Yeah, don't go running around

trying to be heroes,

doing our jobs for us.

That's what

this badge is for.

You got it.

Thank you, officers.

All right, let's take him

downtown and book him.

Well, the precinct's

in midtown.

Yeah, but you gotta

go through downtown--

but don't say "downtown"

when you mean--

-it's easier-- people know--

-just get him outta here!

Good night, officers.

Oh.

Is everything, uh...

Worked out?

Yeah, the press is

starting to leave now.

Okay.

Well, why don't you

both join us?

Barbra,

foxy and rose and I

we've been having some

soul-searching discussion

and we've got a couple

of positive ideas

that we'd like

to run by you.

Barbra, sit.

Sit, Barbra, sit.

Sit.

Sit, Barbra.

I know you don't

know me from Adam,

and I may come off

as a little strange,

but I want to help.

I've done a lot of

family healing,

so, Anthony, please.

Why don't you

have a seat?

You're a part

of this family, too.

We need your help.

All right,

anything to help.

All right.

So rose and foxy and I

have been doing

a little thinking,

doing a little

soul searching,

and we've been talking about

Sonic spirit convention

my award-winning workshop,

in addition to some other

details about my past

and relationship healing.

And um...

Well...

Gentlemen...

I have a gift.

And frankly,

i was a little scared

when I discovered it

as a child,

but I have learned

that is my mission...

To help others

in relationships.

Barbra, you know,

you are--

you must forgive me here--

you love your foxy

but you are a...

A wild animal

that needs to be tamed.

Wild animal!

Is it simple

to be simple?

And you, Anthony.

You're the kind of guy

that needs to see it

to believe it.

You need some real world,

hands-on experience.

I applaud you for that.

You're a thinker.

You're not one of these guys

that's a clown,

that's just going

to be a lemming and

jump off the bridge,

as you put it, right?

No, I respect that.

So without any further ado,

let's sit back, relax,

and witness

the healing power

of the daily chakraphone.

Is that a walkman?

Wait, just... wait.

We'll get to that,

i promise, all right?

It's party time.

Wait, what's going on?

What is this guy doing?

Keep that damn mouth

of yours shut

if you want me

and your son back.

Dumb f***ing cracker-ass.

I think what

your loving foxy

is--quite

passionately as well--

trying to give you

is a, uh,

what we call

an ultimatum.

What?

A ultimatum.

Two choices.

One, you go to

the Sonic spirit convention

with foxy,

and you work on your

relationship and you heal it,

or two, you don't

go to the super Sonic

spirit convention

and instead,

you get a divorce.

And, uh, you get

a custody battle

over your son.

See what I'm trying

to bring you? Peace.

Peace.

Okay?

Anyhow,

what I need you to do is

i need you to work, okay?

It's not gonna be easy.

I mean, I can help you.

There's a way that

we can do this.

It's not gonna be easy

but I'm here to help.

But you are gonna

have to put in the work.

And you are gonna

have to be willing,

and you are gonna have

to want it really bad.

All right?

Yeah.

So, let's begin.

First of all,

I'm gonna ask you a question.

Now the question

is a question

I don't want you

to answer just yet, okay?

The question is--

well, I guess you need

to hear the question first.

The question is

are you going

to the Sonic spirit

convention with foxy

to work on

your relationship?

All right, don't answer.

Don't answer that question

till after you've been

daily chakraphoned.

We're gonna take

ten deep breaths,

we're gonna take

that question,

we're gonna put it

into a crystal ball.

We're gonna focus on it

after we close our eyes.

Okay, we'll do

this step by step.

I'll lead you

through this, okay?

All right,

here we go.

So, ten deep breaths,

like this.

No four, five,

let me do it.

Five.

Six.

Seven-- not yet.

Eight.

Nine.

Ten.

Okay, now--

now you, okay?

--May I touch you?

Yeah.

Okay, that's good.

Let it out, let it out.

All right.

Now we're gonna

take that question

and put it

into a crystal ball,

and focus on

that question,

and we're gonna gently

close our eyes, okay?

Gently.

Gently close our eyes.

All right, we're gonna

face these people, and--

so now...

Once we're relaxed--

once we're relaxed,

we're going to start

the daily chakraphone.

We're going to start

the daily chakraphone.

Okay, so, what happens...

What sometimes happens

during the experience is...

I've never had anyone

ask for a refund, or--

never had any complaint

of failure,

but sometimes what will

happen is there's a--

when the outcome is not

a union but a reunion of sorts

with the self,

if that's where

the energy needed to go,

so in this case if there

is some misguided love

within Barbra,

the daily chakraphone

will find it

and correct it.

All right, so, also

we have to keep in mind

that this is just

one part of the process.

This is just one

of a long process

that will continue during

the spirit Sonic convention,

okay?

So...

Wow. Okay.

- Okay, okay, breathe.

Sh*t.

Breathe.

I want you to just...

Breathe.

Oh, my god.

How are you?

Good.

I feel good!

Oh, wow, that's great.

-Ha!

-That's good.

- Relaxed!

- -Oh, relaxed.

-Relaxed is good.

-Oh!

That's really good.

Wow, you're very warm.

I'm a professional.

I've done this many times.

And you're safe.

You're in good company.

This is so good.

This is really, really good.

Ladies and gentlemen,

can we-- can we please

give Barbra a hand?

- All right, yeah!

Oh, my goodness,

my goodness.

Oh, wow.

That was really

something.

Okay, give me another

deep breath, just--

just to--

great, now,

do you remember

the question?

You can keep your eyes

closed for this.

-I do.

-You remember

the question.

And do you remember putting it

in the crystal ball?

Oh, yes.

Glorious.

Do you remember...

The color?

- I do, I do.

- -Do you see the color?

What is the color

of that crystal ball?

-Do you remember

the color...

-Yeah.

Of the crystal ball?

-Blue!

-Oh!

-Like the sky!

-Oh, ho, ho!

Oh, I can see it!

-Bright blue!

-Oh, bright blue!

Oh, my goodness.

Oh, you guys are gonna have

so much fun when you go.

Oh, my gosh.

You're gonna have

so many new leaders

and so much energy

and so much burning

with fire and energy.

Now I want you

to take the workshop.

The workshop

i want you to take,

a past life regression

correctional boot camp

relationship

couples in crisis

workshop, okay?

We go back in past life,

and then we go forward,

you know,

it's past,

present and future.

We're cleansing all of that.

'Cause that--

it repeats, you know.

I'm so happy for you.

It takes a lot of courage.

This is bullshit.

-You're being rude.

-No, this is a cheap trick.

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