Sideways Page #4

JACK:

Honey, I'm just saying you know I

need a little space before the

wedding. Isn't that the point of

this? Isn't that what we talked about

with Dr. Gertler?

A silence. Then --

CHRISTINE (ON THE PHONE)

Why are you being so defensive?

JACK:

I don't know, Christine. Perhaps

it's because I feel attacked.

CHRISTINE (ON THE PHONE)

I ask you one simple question, and

suddenly I'm attacking you.

JACK:

Listen. I'll call you when we get

there, and we can talk about it then,

okay?

CHRISTINE (ON THE PHONE)

Bye.

JACK:

I love you.

CHRISTINE (ON THE PHONE)

Bye.

Jack SLAMS his cellphone shut, momentarily blinded with rage.

MILES:

Tony Levin? Why did you f***ing invite

Tony Levin?

EXT. 405 FREEWAY - LATE AFTERNOON

The Saab heads north -- now passing through LOS ANGELES.

INT./EXT. SAAB - LATE AFTERNOON

Miles signals and begins to head for an EXIT.

JACK:

Whoa, why are we getting off?

MILES:

I've just got to make one quick stop.

Won't take a second.

JACK:

What?

MILES:

I thought we could just say a quick

hello to my mother.

JACK:

Your mother? Jesus, Miles, we were

supposed to be up there hours ago.

MILES:

It's her birthday tomorrow. And I

don't feel right driving by her house

and not stopping in, okay? It'll

just take a second. She's right off

the freeway.

EXT. 101 FREEWAY - LATE AFTERNOON

The Saab takes an EXIT.

JACK (O.S.)

How old's she going to be?

MILES (O.S.)

Um... seventy... something.

JACK (O.S.)

That's a good age.

OMIT.

OMIT.

EXT. CONDO COMMUNITY STREET - DUSK

The Saab rounds a corner and parks in front of a modest CONDO.

SUPERIMPOSE:

OXNARD, CALIFORNIA

EXT. MILES'S MOTHER'S CONDO - DUSK

Approaching the front door, Miles pulls a BOUQUET OF FLOWERS

out of a plastic grocery store bag. Jack carries a bottle of

CHAMPAGNE.

Miles pulls a BIRTHDAY CARD out of the bag too.

MILES:

Wait a second.

He pulls a PEN from his pocket and signs it. As he licks the

envelope, Jack rings the bell.

Moments later PHYLLIS comes to the door. She is a matronly

older woman in a nightgown and housecoat.

MILES AND JACK:

Surprise! Happy Birthday!

The boys offer up the flowers and champagne. Phyllis slurs

slightly as she speaks -- she's been doing some celebrating

of her own.

PHYLLIS:

My God. Miles. And Jack! What a

surprise. I can't remember the last

time you brought me flowers.

They hug.

JACK:

They're from both of us.

PHYLLIS:

A famous actor bringing me flowers

on my birthday. Don't I feel special?

MILES:

A famous actor who's getting married

next week.

PHYLLIS:

Oh, that's right. Isn't that nice? I

hope that girls knows how lucky she

is, marrying no less than Derek

Summersby.

The boys follow her inside.

INT. MILES'S MOTHER'S CONDO - CONTINUOUS

JACK:

Jeez, Mrs. Raymond, that was eleven

years ago.

PHYLLIS:

Well, you were wonderful on that

show. I never understood why they

had to give you that brain tumor so

soon. Why that didn't make you the

biggest movie star in the world is a

sin. It's a sin.

JACK:

Yeah, well, you should be my agent.

PHYLLIS:

If I was, I would sing your praises

up and down the street until they

put me in the loony bin. Now Miles,

why didn't you tell me you were coming

and bringing this handsome man? Look

how I'm dressed. I've got to run and

put my face on.

JACK:

You look fabulous, Mrs. Raymond.

PHYLLIS:

(over her shoulder)

Oh, stop it. Make yourselves

comfortable.

(now around the corner)

You boys hungry?

MILES:

Yeah, I'm hungry.

Jack gives Miles a look.

MILES:

(low)

Just a snack. Calm down.

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