Simon Konianski Page #4

Synopsis: Simon, 35, has returned to live temporarily with his father. They make life unbearable for each other. To add spice to this situation, Uncle Maurice and Aunt Mala, Ernest's brother and sister, meddle in everything and, notably, try to find a "nice little Jewish girl" for Simon to marry. When Ernest passes away, Simon fulfils his father's last request: bury him in the village where he was born, in the depths of Ukraine. And so Simon finds himself caught up in an event-packed road movie in the company of his paranoid old uncle, his aunt who nags him endlessly about his "Goy dancer", his six-years-old son, his father's body and his ghost, and also a rabbit. Not to mention his ex who hassles him by phone. The journey will be nothing like a cruise down the Nile!
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Micha Wald
Production: Haut et Court
 
IMDB:
6.2
Year:
2009
100 min
11 Views


My son's complete.

Enough ofthis nonsense.

No, Dad, wait...

Sh*t...

Wake up!

No way...

Get up, you idler, it's 8:30.

How long will you sleep?

- Get up, Dad.

- Too much sleep is bad for you!

l want to sleep.

lch will ghlufent

We were driving all day

and you two snored like walruses.

Mala and l will drive then.

F***ing hell!

You really got me! 8:30...

Ty that again

and you'll hitchhike back.

Don't phone and drive, Simon.

lt's too dangerous.

Who are you?

lt's Mrs Hirschfeld.

Give me the phone.

Hello, Gitla? How are you?

That old bat has my number?

l never take my mobile

with me abroad. It costs too much.

So, tell me...

Have you seen Dr Goldbeter?

Two minutes, Mala.

Good, isn't he?

Know what the Poles

gave us for dinner yesterday?

Goloubtgit

Stuffed cabbage.

Yes, and they put lard in it.

lt wasn't at all bad, you know.

Right!

Enough! Give me the phone!

l have to go.

Give me the phone!

l'll call you back.

My nephew's a bit on edge.

Give me the phone!

Yes, the pro-Palestinian one.

l didn't tell her to take vitamins.

You're incredible!

Let me tell you a stoy, Simon,

about what happened

after the Krauts occupied our town.

l was caught

in a round-up with a pal.

They took us to this fancy house

where some rich fellow used to live.

The Gestapo had moved in there.

You should have seen them.

Strapping men.

The others gave us boots to clean.

They were gone by morning

and only one was left.

At one point, he said,

''Come here.''

l went but l couldn't look at him.

He was a superior race, see.

After the war...

Are you listening?

Yes.

l met pals who weren't with me.

They had been in Russia

as partisans.

Those fellows knew howto drink.

What did they do to a guy?

They got a ierycan full of petrol,

they bought rotten hooch,

put it in there, made us drink it...

The state l was in, Simon.

You've no idea.

For a week, l couldn't comb my hair

because ofthe electricity in it.

Where's Hadrien? He isn't at school.

Is he sick?

What?

ln Poland?

With Mala and Maurice?

You've lost your mind!

You kidnap my son and go to Poland?

l haven't kidnapped him.

Don't overreact.

We'll be back after we buy Grandpa.

Buy Grandpa?

You realize what you're saying?

You're crazy! Hadrien's only six!

Calm down. He wanted to come.

l knewyou wouldn't agree.

Talk to your mother.

Hello, Mum?

Are you ok, sweetheart?

Don't wory,

Mum will get you home soon.

Don't wory.

l don't want to come home!

l want to send Grandpa

on his journey.

l want to stay with Dad, Mala,

Maurice and Grandpa.

He wants to stay with us.

l need him to be here with us.

l want him to stay. Please.

Get my son back here fast.

Or l'll cut your custody rights,

call the cops,

cut off your balls and feed

them to you

to stop you pissing me off!

- Hey, l respect you.

- She agreed, you said?

Cut it out!

Of course l'm not talking to you!

l think you're fabulous,

divine, magnificent...

Sexy and all that, fantastic,

and not a ball-buster.

l don't want to go home!

And you said she agreed!

You kidnapped Hadrien

and now we're accomplices

to kidnapping.

Exactly, Auntie.

Add illegal transport of a corpse.

That's a capital offence in Ukraine.

You can hang for it.

Ty to be reasonable.

Take the boy home to his mother.

The poor woman will go mad.

She's already mad!

Why defend her? You can't stand her.

l don't hate her. Not at all.

All the same, l'm glad

you're not together anymore.

What if she really

does call the police?

Sh*t, he's not going to start now!

Dad, was Mum really angy?

Mum is a bit angy, yes.

Dad's a bit angy too. Eveyone is.

Being angy can be good.

When you're not angy anymore,

you're less angy and feel better.

Why Lublin? You're hungy again?

We have family here.

Sh*t...

Could you be a little more positive?

Stop moaning

and complicating things.

We're fetching the stone.

What stone?

Your father's gravestone.

You can't buy him without a stone!

What is this Jewish nuthouse?

Simon, don't be so negative.

Tevi, my cousin,

has invited us here.

We'll pick up the stone tomorrow.

l knewyour father well.

We fought together

against the Germans

with the Russians.

We were young.

l wasn't 16.

We were members of a youth brigade

of Jewish Communists.

What year was that?

l don't remember exactly.

Did you know

my father's first wife, Sarah?

Oh, yes!

Sarah...

And? What?

Did you know my father's first wife?

Who on earth is Martha Feiermann?

Do you know

what a stone like this costs?

He'll flip it over

and engrave another name on it.

Where's it from? Did you steal it?

Certainly not.

The Feiermanns changed their minds.

They want pink marble.

Those people are such snobs.

Orchestra conductors

for generations...

Two tons of stone in my car...

It'll wreck my suspension.

Over my dead body!

Simon, that car was in Lublin.

Look!

Don't start again, Maurice.

lt's already bad enough

without the Stasi.

What's the Stasi?

Friends of Maurice's, sweetheart.

You're using the phone again?

lt's dangerous!

Especially with the stone.

Where are you?

l knew it!

l knew you wouldn't turn back!

l iust saw my brother's lawyer,

Lopez Garcia.

He's calling the police.

Don't lie.

Evey border will have your photo.

Turn back

or you'll end up in a Polish jail.

Fine... Hadrien will have

a father in jail.

Did you think of him

before bringing that Garcia guy in.

Hadrien's my son too.

l can make decisions without you.

No, l won't put him on!

Screwyour Garcia lawyer guy.

Yeah, Interpol,

the Stasi, the FBl...

Screwthem all!

l'm an immature kid?

Yeah, l'm immature.

You're a f***ing

self-centred egotist!

The world has to revolve around you!

Go to Brazil with Karl,

l don't give a sh*t!

What? That's brilliant!

Get married! Go ahead!

No way will you take Hadrien.

He's my son, he's staying!

Yeah, f*** you!

F*** you and the Brazilian

dancing fool!

F***ing hell!

There, that's the way

to speak to that goy.

She'll realize now

she's not right for you.

You spoke well, Simon.

Don't let yourself be ruled

by some goy

who cheated on you with a darkie.

After the war ended,

once we were able

to start eating again...

That's enough!

Get out ofthis car, both ofyou!

l'm sick of it!

Get the hell out!

l don't want to get out...

F***ing hell!

You're 5km from Lublin.

Hitch a ride, get a train,

l'll cary on alone.

- What's that? Shall we go in?

- No, wiser not to.

But what is it?

lt's where Grandpa was a prisoner.

lt's not a good idea.

Fat Kapo Michal was here?

That's right.

Come on, it's not for children.

But l want to go in!

Hadrien! Come back here right now!

Hadrien!

- Schmuli!

- Fat Kapo Michal!

You don't run in a camp!

Schmuli!

Where are you? This isn't funny!

Schmuli?

Simon...

What are you so frightened of, son?

- Dad...

- l wanted to say l'm proud ofyou.

Proud you brought my grandson here.

l know how hard it was.

lt's good that you see for yourself.

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Micha Wald

Micha Wald (born 1974) is a Belgian film director and screenwriter. His short film Alice and I (2004) received the Joseph Plateau Award for Best Short Film at the 17th Joseph Plateau Awards. Wald made his feature-length debut in 2007 with In the Arms of My Enemy (Voleurs de chevaux), which premiered at the 2007 Cannes Film Festival and earned him a nomination for the Caméra d'Or.Wald next wrote and directed the film Simon Konianski (2009), starring Jonathan Zaccaï. The film had its world premiere at the 2009 Festival Paris Cinéma. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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