Sleeping with the Fishes Page #9

But, what I'm trying to say

is that my ex is... is just that.

An extra, in the background,

like... like noise.

Dead air, to be exact.

Okay, yeah, well, she did

not look like dead air.

She looked quite alive and comfortable

in her spandex.

- Yeah, about that.

She's shooting a film,

and she offered me a crumb.

Which, I might add, I'm not biting.

Because I'm honestly done with all that.

I'm not looking to make

a sequel of that drama.

Really? 'Cause, um,

what was all that talk

about her leaving Jason,

you know, and you guys

getting back together?

It's just acting.

Just running lines, that's it.

She wanted me to audition for this role

'cause she thought it might

get me back in the game.

And for a nanosecond, I thought,

I might still want it.

The acting, that is.

But... but I don't.

And that's where you come in.

Really?

Yeah, it's weird.

But, for some reason,

not knowing you a whole lot

doesn't matter.

'Cause you just fit the part,

you know what I'm saying?

No.

I never really fit the part.

Probably why I got kicked

out of Hebrew school.

Well, that, and punching

Jessica Katz in the throat

for saying I was adopted from Vietnam.

- I gave it to her good.

- Were you?

And, they're fake.

Well, at least they don't die.

Just need a little

dusting from time to time.

- Yeah, well, I don't dust.

- I do.

- Do you?

- Mm-hmm.

- Are you

gonna kiss me? - Mm-hmm.

Okay, well, then, I think you should.

Oh, lovely, thank you so much.

Da-da-da-da! - You look amazing.

Oh, my God, thank you!

Getting it together!

I know, even though

clearly this is a knock off.

All right, tall order, small budget.

- This is what you get.

- Thank you, Jude.

Regardless, do not spill

anything on it, okay?

- 'Cause it's rental.

- Damn it, I knew it!

Hey, will you do me a favor and just

hold down the floor for a second?

I gotta handle something,

I'll be right back.

- You know it.

- All right, thank you.

By the way, looking

pretty sexy Lexi today.

Stop it.

See, if Superman could come

back from the dead, so could you.

- That wasn't...

- That's a compliment.

- Didn't feel like one.

- It is a compliment!

Mm! Mm!

I would compliment

that. Any time you like.

Louis...

I need to go save some lives.

I can do this.

I wish you would have told me sooner.

Did Dad send you?

No.

I came to talk on my own.

Why didn't you tell me the truth?

And surrender my pride?

I should have known something was wrong

with your marriage when you started

gaining all that weight.

I'm gonna assume that that

came from a good place.

Ay mija. I love you.

I never meant for you to question that.

Mira Lexita, I...

maybe I didn't give you the guidance

and the support that you wanted.

But, I... I gave you

what I knew how to give.

I know, Mom.

You look beautiful.

- You think so?

- I know so.

Good luck out there.

Ooh.

All right, so...

okay, let's scooch

in a little over here.

Starman, if you come up

a little bit, thank you.

Okay, ready?

Very nice, very nice.

Nice Yamaka.

Thank you.

You guys look incredible.

Thanks.

You look pretty good yourself.

Thank you.

You do clean up well.

Oh, that was a little backhanded,

but I'll take it from you.

Do you wanna come with

me to the loading dock

to pick up our guest of honor, please?

Sure, sure.

Hey Memo, I'll be back in just a minute.

Best behavior, yeah?

- Okay.

- All right.

You're it. No tag backs.

...right around the corner, but...

Oh!

Yeah, so, Casey sends

her sincerest apologies.

But, the monkey she booked for you guys

got booked to play Abu in "Aladdin".

On Broadway, hm.

So, she sent Mookie to take his place.

I'll be back at 5:00 to pick him up.

Okay, uh, Mookie's not a monkey.

Oh, what makes you say that?

He's not a monkey, but he's, uh...

he's cute.

I like his little cape.

That man was kinda creepy, right?

- Yeah, definitely creepy.

- Yeah?

- Okay.

- Fat chance.

Ta-da!

Ta-da, not a monkey!

All right, tall order, small budget.

- This is what you get.

- Yeah, yeah.

You get a small South American rodent.

You know, I really don't think Shari

will be able to tell the difference.

Oh, isn't he cute? But it does

not take a rocket scientist

to see that is definitely not a monkey.

Not a monkey at all.

Oh, my God. Monkey!

Mom, look! He's awesome!

You guys rock.

You totally saved my day.

That's what we are here for.

- Oh!

- Oh, Lord, Lord!

You got him?

- There you go.

- Mm!

- Okay.

- All right!

So, maybe she's in special ed.

That, we're not gonna say again.

- Oh.

- You know, maybe I should

go and take some pictures

of her with the rodent.

All right, just, ahem,

photograph her from the waist up.

Just go waist up.

Awesome.

Nice job.

I see you took a little bit of my advice

and got yourself a piece of man candy.

- Oh!

- Bravo!

Excuse me, honey,

but can you escort me to the latrine?

I may need your assistance.

Whee!

And suddenly, it's all so clear.

Like a crystal.

Whatever.

Precious.

Photography, waist up.

Lookie, lookie!

What do you have here?

Did you get a number at a Bat Mitzvah?

Ew!

That costume must really

be working for you.

No, woman, it is for you!

That woman on table 20

wants you to call her

about her husband's

surprise 60th birthday party!

- Whoop whoop!

- Get it, get it.

No, burn it!

- What, the number?

- Never.

Hey, hey, hey!

To all the love birds in the house,

I got this

oldie-but-goodie for ya.

- No, no, no.

- You owe me.

Thinking about you

Oh, you waited so long...

Oh, you know what?

Nice, that was a great shot, thank you.

No, thank you.

You tried to open my eyes

Like a brand new day...

- Are you?

- Yeah, look at that.

Oh, oh!

Oh, my goodness, I never knew.

Whoa!

Look at that, what a prize, huh?

Take care, thanks for coming.

Here you go, honey.

You trying to steal one of my gift bags?

You hungry?

Well, where did Memo go?

The babysitter just picked him up.

Yeah, I'm starving.

Great.

After you.

Okay.

Ah, that was a successful day, huh?

Rodent and all.

You think?

You know, it's all about perception.

If you think it is, then it is.

I think it was amazing.

It was good, right?

Mm-hmm.

Mm!

Yummy!

A woman's heart, you know the way.

Cheesy goodness, mm.

I knew it.

I haven't had a slider in ages.

Why, why would you deprive yourself?

Mm.

I guess I... I don't know.

I guess I got used to, uh,

not giving myself the good

things in life, you know?

And now?

I guess I can change my flight.

That's a good start, right?

It's a great start.

So show me, show me

What you can't say

You want to know me

Well, find a way

'Cause I've been waiting

and praying for someone

I can't see

So show me, show me, show me

Don't let me be

Your lips are

filled with passion

When we lay down in our bed

But they don't seem as certain

When you leave the words unsaid

I'm craving just a moment

To gaze into your mind

All I'm asking

Is for a little sign

So show me, show me

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