Small Pond Page #3

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and you know, it was a natural

fit.

That is so cool.

Yeah, I remember walking into

Salt of the Earth and picking up

that first Dub Narcotic

seven-inch and taking it home,

and it was like... wow.

Yeah.

You mind if we have a seat?

These heels are killing me.

Okay.

...I thought, you know this is so

corny, but just for a brief second,

"maybe I'll put a record out on

K one day," you know,

just oozing childish naivet.

Well, here's to the intersection

of fantasy and reality, right?

Cheers.

Life's a funny thing sometimes.

It's so funny! You know,

because, like, well...

...I never harbored any

ambition of being, you know,

an internationally renowned

recording artist or anything...

"Down, boy. "

...no, but seriously.

I used to write the music reviews

for my high school paper,

and I couldn't carry a tune or play

an instrument to save my life, but...

...I always thought, you know,

maybe I could still contribute

to the scene in some meaningful

way, like work for a Thrill Jockey

or a K Records or a Touch and

Go. You know?

If you're willing to

roll up your sleeves and...

...put in your hours at

the "merch" table...

I am so up for it! Seriously.

All right, here's what I'm

thinking. You got a pen?

Pen. Uh... wait, pocket? No.

Hold on one second.

Excuse me! Does anyone have a

pen?

Anything I could use to write

with...

Sharpie!

I was thinking you should maybe

give Calvin Johnson a call.

Really?

Yeah, I mean maybe he doesn't have

anything percolating at the moment,

but you could just introduce yourself,

do the whole "hi-how-you-doing" routine

and see where it goes.

Wow. I mean...

that would be amazing, to be a part

of the whole K Records enterprise!

Cool. All right, are you ready?

I am! Okay, shoot!

360- 555...

Hang on, let me try that again.

I don't know. Just one more try...

360- 555...

...7777.

Um, no.

Okay, I don't... I don't understand.

You know what? Just tell it to me.

I have a killer memory and...

it's... you know.

A killer memory.

It's a little safety deposit

box up there.

360- 555- 7777.

7777. Got it.

Not even going to write it down.

Nope!

360- 555- 7777. I got it.

Well, it was nice to meet you,

Kirsten.

You too! And you know, if you guys

are ever in town... hook me up!

You got it! All right, bye.

Take care of yourself...

...Jeff Carrillo.

360- 555...

360...

Holy f***!

God damn it!

F***!

F*** off and die!

Word!

You understand what I'm saying!

We need to do something because nobody...

...understands what is

happening with the workers!

Just a regular old coffee to go.

It's gonna be $1.87.

Sorry.

It's fine.

I swear that I wasn't trying to

F*** you, f*** off, eat a f***ing

dick, I don't f***ing care!

Don't f***ing talk to me!

Pizza for Stacey with an E-Y. Stacey with

an E-Y, come and get your pizza already.

Would you like something to

drink with that?

I would, please. How about a

Stag?

No problem.

That will be $3.75, please.

Keep the change.

Have a great day!

Thanks.

Hey guys.

Hey there!

Cookie and a soda... cookie

and no soda?

Water's fine.

You know, you guys really should ask your

parents for a little extra lunch money.

I mean, I'm sure they're willing to

spring for the occasional soda pop...

You know, I'm sorry.

No, no... it's fine.

No, I shouldn't have said that.

It's fine... for the both of us,

uh... keep the change! Thanks.

Do you take Discover?

I can't, I'm sorry, I have to

go pick up Beth from school

and then drive her to her

meeting.

Meeting? What kind of meeting?

It's, uh... the kind of meeting

where people go and exchange ideas.

Usually while seated.

You are not cool!

Yeah, I am.

No way, it's... too far.

Please tell me you take

Discover.

Grumble.

Sh*t!

Please tell me he is not bartending

at his own going away party.

Yep! That's Jeremy for you.

...there's a story by Miranda

July about a dog named Potato...

Hey Straub!

Oh. Hey, Kirsten. Talk to

Jeremy yet?

Oh. Nah, he looks all busy,

embroiled in conversation, and...

Hey, Kirsten.

Hey, Jeremy.

You look like you need a drink!

You know what, I'm good right

now, thanks.

So I was going to ask you about

that job that you asked me about...

Oh, yeah... Katie's picking up

that shift.

Really?

Yeah, she's hungry for it,

she's good to go, and...

...I detected a sense of, shall

we say,

tentativeness in my response to

my original inquiry?

Right.

Okay, that's fair, I guess.

Thanks anyway!

...just as dirty, right?

Because you know how linoleum,

in the cracks and the creases

of it, it just gets dirty

and you can't get it out no

matter how hard you scrub,

even with bleach? I hate that.

So then I was...

Hey.

F*** off.

I bought groceries!

Well, hoo-f***ing-ray.

So I guess you talked to Straub

today.

Yeah, and I talked to Dennie

today. Just so you know.

Okay.

I'm buying the house. It's

mine. The house is mine.

Really.

Yeah, well, f*** it, I mean...

I'm practically paying Dennie's

mortgage as it is

and I figured why not cut out

the middleman, you know?

Right.

I mean, I'm months away from settling,

but it's practically a done deal.

Okay, cool.

Could you at least not be such a total

b*tch about it between now and then?

Wow! Uh... sure, why not?

Thanks, Katie!

You're welcome.

So I was thinking tile. I could

do that myself...

Oh, hey Kirsten. Where you

going?

I'm going to f***ing McNally's!

Is that for real?

Yeah, they're leftover from

Halloween.

Let's giddy up.

Hey! How much for the whole

shirt? I want it.

Get lost!

Yeah, real mature.

Yeah, get your old ass out of

here!

I ain't leaving 'til I got that

shirt.

I got sixteen bucks, so that's

like sixteen sucks?

Strike three, captain.

Oh, come on!

That guy, huh?

Welcome to my world.

Thank you. I love your world.

Hey, "wrong way"...

What?

...I mean "Wang Mei"! I mean...

...get us another round of

"pink tacos," will you?

Copy that.

How many more of those?

What the hell is a "pink taco"?

It's... Knockov orange,

Knockov strawberry,

Knockov raspberry, Knockov sour

apple...

Basically it's a pint of vodka.

With cranberry and sour.

That's nutty.

Hey, we're going to go grab a

smoke. Can you watch our drinks?

You got it.

Killer.

No sh*t!

Where'd they go?

Just out for a smoke, but...

I'm ready to settle up.

You're not going to start a tab?

Not tonight.

All right, well have a good

night!

Lynn!

Hey.

Small world!

Yep!

What's up?

I was just going to check out McNally's,

I got a coupon... "Ad Sheet"!

It's a cool place, I like it a

lot.

Hey, you know what? I just

wanted to let you know that

I'm really sorry that I disappointed

you and your friends the other night,

I've just been fighting a ton

with Katie

and just couldn't handle a

couple more people at my house.

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah... they're gone, they took

off late last night, to...

Champaign to go crash at his

cousin's, so you know...

Hey listen, if your coupon's still

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