Smother Page #4

take your shirt off.

I'm kidding.

Welcome back to the Bazaar.

Thank you.

That's really a good joke.

Thank you so much.

You're welcome.

Thank you.

See you tomorrow.

I mean it.

Thank you. Mr. Donnie.

Mom, mom, what are you doing here?!

I just got a job!

Where?!

Right here.

They need a sales assistant,

someone to write up orders,

schedule deliveries things like...

No, no, no, there's not way

they need anyone like that.

I got done shopping so I came in

because it was so hot outside.

Oh, remind me to ask them

when them cleaned the

air conditioning filters last.

Because you know what

You can get Legionnaires

Disease if something

Mom! Mom! Mom!

- What?

- Focus.

What happened was

I got talking to Donnie

and he thought I'm gonna be

perfect for the job,

and I could use the money

so I thought why not?

Can you believe it?!

I haven't had a job since I worked

at the House of Peanuts

before you were born.

And now we're going to be

co workers!

Hug me hard!

OK:

You know, darling.

It's your apartment.

Take care of it.

Good morning.

I'd like to welcome everyone to

Carpet Bazaar orientation.

Alright, cut the crap.

We're going to

watch a safety video,

then move on to

a tour of the facility.

Excuse me, Donnie.

Do we have to watch this video?

I mean, I've already seen it.

What color is my lamp?

Your lamp?

What color is my lamp?

Gold.

That's right.

Its gold.

Im the owner that means I make

all executive level decisions.

What color is your lamp?

His is silver.

That's right, it's silver.

Good initiative, Marilyn.

Thank you.

Silver means assistant manager,

which means assistant

level decisions.

Yours is bronze.

No decisions.

Put your hand down.

The following safety

video contains information

that may one day save your lives.

I suggest taking notes.

He seems very knowledgeable.

It only takes a second.

But watching the vide

feels like a lifetime.

Oh my god.

What's the message of that?

Don't drive a wood panel station

wagon on the weather blizzard.

Hey, you guys.

I'm in here.

Help! Help!

Honey, heart goes out.

To the actors? It's...

But...

Oh also you'll see the yearn of

the actress in this video

Shhhh, Donnis could come back.

He may quiz us.

I want to be the person who knows

what my job is in requirements.

We also have some

new product lines

You'll have to

familiarize yourself

with immediately.

That should be a rewarding challenge.

Pop Quiz.

How many square yards

are there in a twelve

by eighteen foot piece of carpet?

Thousand?

Twenty-four.

Looks like somebody's already

forgot his conversions.

OK? Don't let me down again.

Hi, honey.

Hi Donnie.

Incidentally,

I presume you can

maintain a professional

working relationship

with your mother?

Yeah, about that.

I'm a little concerned

she lacks any

qualifications whatsoever.

I'm an incredible

judge of potential.

She'll be fine.

But she hasn't worked

since the peanut-

Shhh. This is learning time.

Take this opportunity to learn.

OK. What's the most important

thing about sales?

I'm pretty sure it's friendliness.

No, the up-sell.

Come on,

shake the cobwebs out, man.

Okay, quick refresher course.

See the lady over there?

I'm going to up-sell her,

and youre gonna watch me.

Understand?

I think I'm starting to.

She's looking at Berber,

but she's leaving

with Multi-Frame Wilton.

Watch and learn.

Go, Cheese.

I see you're looking the Berber.

Yes.

It's very nice.

But if you wanna go classy.

You must look this one down here.

It's Multi-Frame Wilton.

Hmm...

Check it out.

Hmm... that feels nice.

Yes, that's probably

the best carpet we have.

I'm gonna try not

to be involved this.

Look down the bottom.

Can you see it?

You may need to bend a little bit.

Right there.

Is he Samoanan?

Hello

Home again, home again, jiggity-jig.

I don't know about you, but this

working stiff could

sure use a cold one.

Make mine a double.

Sperm are dwindling... It's occupied!

It's me.

Your mom needs some Tums,

she ran out.

Just taking a shower.

A very mild and soothing shower.

You're not

playing soapy worm, are you?

Ha ha, you caught me.

I'll be out in a minute.

It's just so much fun

to be part of a team.

Oh you know what, Clare.

We get a 10% employee discount

on every 2500 square feet of

carpet that we purchase.

True.

And they have

a big picnic every June,

and they have a competitive

softball team, Myron.

It sounds like you're really

enjoying yourself.

You would be so proud of

Noah out there today,

even though he didn't

talk to me very much.

I figure he must be

working on his work

when his customer service,

not intentionally

ignoring his mom.

Yeah, I was really proud of me,

too.

Cause there was a moment

I'm gonna be honest

that I'm a over qualified and

useless at the same time.

And then I saw the gigantic

piece of the carpet,

and I realized that

the genie would be

bottled in here the whole time...

I think I'm the wiser for it.

I had a nice breakthrough

on the script today.

Did you?

In the middle of a village raid

searching for mercenary VC,

Tom Dawson starts to grow

a syringe-like proboscis-

Excuse me.

Slaker, weird nose.

Well, I guess his attention span

isn't what it used to be.

I just had a lot this moment, I...

Oh my god, I have to get ready

for my Pain Pals meeting.

They're gonna

be here in any second!

Clare, Dinner, Yummy

Did you make any desert?

In the fridge.

Right on.

So anyway, I've been eating

a lot of chocolate,

which I know doesn't helped

my blood sugar level,

and the chewing is causing

my TMJ flare up.

Can you hear that?

Listen, here we go.

Oh, no

Horrible! Marilyn.

I do exactly the same thing.

Oh, honey.

You know about my son, Noah.

Hi, Noah.

Hi there.

Dear, do you think you could

take a look at Barbara's foot?

Her G.P.

Says she has fallen her arches

but she feels like

she needs a second opinion.

She should really see

a podiatrist about that.

It's just a little peek, Noah.

It's been so difficult getting

around on the bus lately.

I'd really appreciate it.

Well, since you're riding

mass trans, so I'll look.

Thank you, Sweetie.

I am worried about her.

Oh, dear, look that, honey.

Oh, right here.

Oh, that, Oh, that's the...

We were so sorry to hear about

you losing your job like that,

but don't worry about it,

honey.

I'm sure you're gonna

land on your feet.

Did you hear that, Myron?

Could I see you outside, please?

Excuse me, girls.

What are you going to do, Marilyn,

hide out here forever?

I'm an independent woman now!

I've got a job!

Is she serious?

Yeah, with me.

Good! Now you can pay me back

for that

refugee kid you send money

to every month!

It's a scam, you know!

Don't you dare talk about

Joaquin that way!

Joaquin?

Last year,

wasn't it the Nastone.

Jesus

What are you looking at?

Would you calm down, please?

I don't want to calm.

Would you please not

upset the Pain Pals.

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