Social Animals Page #7

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charming if I were British.

Cheerio. It worked.

No, it didn't.

God, I'm really bad at accents.

You are, you actually

are really bad at it.

I know this isn't where you

imagined yourself at this age.

You mean closing my

failing business, single?

I don't know, it

seems about right.

Did you hear about

Peter and Lana?

He filed for divorce.

You got me bad

news for my birthday?

You know I love

other people's bad news.

Speaking of, Paul and Jane,

while no longer Paul and Jane.

Wow, really?

You gonna hit that?

No.

- Why?

I think I'm gonna be celibate.

Oh. That'll last.

Uh, it will last.

I will be celibate.

GOING OUT OF BUSINESS

PAUL'S PICK

ZOE:

GRAND OPENING!

Hey. Nice sign.

A little on the nose.

I know.

This is great, congrats.

Thanks. - It's amazing.

- Thank you very much.

You know, all my life, I've

anticipated failure so much

it's kind of bizarre when

it's not actually happening.

Mmm.

Sounds nice, enjoy it.

Hey, I heard

about you and Jane.

And I'm really sorry.

"How you holdin' up?

Oddly well.

That's good to hear.

- Yeah, except for one thing.

What?

I keep trying to not

be in love with you.

And it does not

seem to be working.

Hmm, interesting turn

of events. - Mmm-hmm.

Let me just lay out

some ground rules.

There's gonna be no

sleeping together, no sex.

I'm so sorry.

- Okay, great, see you.

All right.

Come here.

Hey.

- Yeah?

I think I'm comin'

around on Tom Petty.

Okay, we can have sex.

Let's f***. - Oh, fantastic.

The table's very

small but it is full-service.

No, wait, I have an idea.

- No, wait, don't leave me.

No, I need to get this. - Don't

leave me. - Come on. - All right.

Promise, this is gonna be good.

One, two, three.

THIS IS PAUL AND ZOE

Good one. Got it.

Do this? - No, no.

- I've seen people do this.

Told you.

FAVORITE POSITION:

NEXT TO EACH OTHER

My most memorable

blowj*bs was with a celebrity.

Oh, I try not to brag

about that too much, uh...

But I met Rick Moranis

right after Honey,

I Shrunk the Kids

and, honey, did

I shrink his kids.

You know?

I'm sweating.

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