Some Like It Hot Page #26

SUGAR:

Why?

JOE:

Because usually, when people find

out who I am, they get themselves a

wheel chair and a shyster lawyer,

and sue me for a quarter of a million

dollars.

SUGAR:

Well, don't worry. I won't sue you --

no matter who you are.

JOE:

(returning to chair)

Thank you.

SUGAR:

Who are you?

JOE:

Now, really --

Jerry and the other girls are looking off toward Sugar,

waiting for the ball.

JERRY:

Hey, Sugar -- come on.

Sugar picks up the ball.

JOE:

(blase)

So long.

He buries himself behind the Wall Street Journal again.

Sugar hesitates for a second, then throws the ball back to

the girls. She steps closer to Joe, peers around the paper,

studying him.

SUGAR:

Haven't I seen you somewhere before?

JOE:

(without looking up)

Not very likely.

SUGAR:

Are you staying at the hotel?

JOE:

Not at all.

SUGAR:

Your face is familiar.

JOE:

Possible you saw it in a newspaper --

or magazine -- Vanity Fair --

SUGAR:

That must be it.

JOE:

(waving her aside)

Would you mind moving just a little?

You're blocking my view.

SUGAR:

Your view of what?

JOE:

They run up a red-and-white flag on

the yacht when it's time for

cocktails.

SUGAR:

(snapping at the bait)

You have a yacht?

She turns and looks seaward at a half-a-dozen yachts of

different sizes bobbing in the distance.

SUGAR:

(continuing)

Which one is yours -- the big one?

JOE:

Certainly not. With all that unrest

in the world, I don't think anybody

should have a yacht that sleeps more

than twelve.

SUGAR:

I quite agree. Tell me, who runs up

that flag -- your wife?

JOE:

No, my flag steward.

SUGAR:

And who mixes the cocktails -- your

wife?

JOE:

No, my cocktail steward. Look, if

you're interested in whether I'm

married or not --

SUGAR:

I'm not interested at all.

JOE:

Well, I'm not.

SUGAR:

That's very interesting.

Joe resumes reading the paper. Sugar sits on the sand beside

his chair.

SUGAR:

(continuing)

How's the stock market?

JOE:

(lackadaisically)

Up, up, up.

SUGAR:

I'll bet just while we were talking,

you made like a hundred thousand

dollars.

JOE:

Could be. Do you play the market?

SUGAR:

No -- the ukulele. And I sing.

JOE:

For your own amusement?

SUGAR:

Well -- a group of us are appearing

at the hotel. Sweet Sue and Her

Society Syncopators.

JOE:

You're society girls?

SUGAR:

Oh, yes. Quite. You know -- Vassar,

Bryn Mawr -- we're only doing this

for a lark.

JOE:

Syncopators -- does that mean you

play that fast music -- jazz?

SUGAR:

Yeah. Real hot.

JOE:

Oh. Well, I guess some like it hot.

But personally, I prefer classical

music.

SUGAR:

So do I. As a matter of fact, I spent

three years at the Sheboygan

Conservatory of Music.

JOE:

Good school! And your family doesn't

object to your career?

SUGAR:

They do indeed. Daddy threatened to

cut me off without a cent, but I

don't care. It was such a bore --

coming-out parties, cotillions --

JOE:

Inauguration balls --

SUGAR:

Opening of the Opera --

JOE:

Riding to hounds --

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