Some Like It Hot Page #30

JOE:

Of course, you're not. I'm going.

JERRY:

You're going to be on the boat with

that dirty old man?

JOE:

No. I'm going to be on that boat

with Sugar.

JERRY:

And where's he going to be?

JOE:

He's going to be ashore with you.

JERRY:

With ME?

JOE:

That's right.

JERRY:

Oh, no! Not tonight, Josephine!

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. HOTEL BALLROOM - NIGHT

It's a good sized nightclub of the period, with about 200

guests in formal dress -- evening gowns, white dinner jackets --

at the tables and on the dance floor. A revolving globe,

with a mirrored surface, throws patterns of light and shadow

on the dancers.

On the bandstand, Sugar, backed by the rest of the orchestra,

is singing. The girls in the band, Joe and Jerry among them,

wear uniform evening gowns and long earrings. Sugar and Sue

war distinctive gowns.

Sugar's song is "I WANT TO BE LOVED BY YOU" -- which she

belts across in the style of the Twenties, complete with

poop-poop-pa-doop trimmings. As she sings, she scans the

room for her bespectacled Prince Charming, but there is no

sign of him -- naturally, since he is playing the saxophone

behind her.

In back of Joe is Jerry, thumping the bass grimly. He looks

off, sees --

Osgood Fielding the Third, in a white mess jacket, sitting

alone at a table. Catching Jerry's eye, he waves exuberantly,

his face beaming with amorous anticipation.

On the bandstand, Jerry looks away haughtily.

JOE:

(over his shoulder)

Daphne -- your boy friend is waving

at you.

JERRY:

You can both go take a flying jump.

JOE:

Remember -- he's your date for

tonight. So smile.

Jerry smiles feebly.

JOE:

(continuing)

Come on, you can do better than that.

Give him teeth -- the whole

personality.

JERRY:

(a frozen smile on

his face)

Why do I let you talk me into these

things? Why?

JOE:

Because we're pals -- buddies -- the

two musketeers.

JERRY:

Don't give me the musketeers! How'm

I going to keep the guy ashore?

JOE:

Tell him you get seasick on a yacht.

Play miniature golf with him.

JERRY:

Oh, no. I'm not getting caught in a

miniature sand trap with that guy.

The fresh young Bellhop we saw earlier comes up beside the

bandstand, carrying a large wicker basket full of flowers.

BELLHOP:

(to Joe)

Which of you dolls is Daphne?

JOE:

Bull fiddle.

The Bellhop hands the basket to Jerry, nods off toward

Osgood's table.

BELLHOP:

It's from Satchel Mouth at Table

Seven.

(he breaks off one

flower, hands it to

Joe)

This is from me to you, doll.

JOE:

Beat it, Buster.

BELLHOP:

(confidentially)

Never mind leaving your door open --

I got a passkey.

He winks and moves off. Joe looks after him contemptuously,

then turns to Jerry, picks up the basket of flowers.

JERRY:

What are you doing with my flowers?

JOE:

I'm just borrowing them. You'll get

them back tomorrow.

He hands Jerry the single flower, then looks around, fishes

a small envelope out of his decolletage, slips it into the

basket.

Sugar finishes her number, returns to her seat next to Joe.

Sue leads the orchestra into the signature music, SWEET SUE.

SUGAR:

(to Joe)

I guess he's not going to show up --

it's give minutes to one -- you

suppose he forgot?

JOE:

Well, you know how those millionaires

are.

(pointing at basket

of flowers)

These came for you.

SUGAR:

For me?

(she opens the note)

It's Shell Oil.

JERRY:

(sarcastically)

No!

SUGAR:

Yes. He wants me to have supper with

him -- on his yacht -- he's going to

pick me up at the pier.

JERRY:

No!

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