Sorority Boys Page #3

Clean, clean, clean.

How do I look?

Well, I --

Personally, I think|you look better|with two tits.

Yeah.

Oh, sh*t, man. What|happened to my other --

Hey!

You're eating my bosom!

Look, uh, just try to pay|a little more attention

to the details, you know?

Yeah.

We -- we don't have to be|babes -- just believable.

By this time tomorrow,|we'll be back in the house.

And after that,|we repress and deny

any memories of this|whole experience...right?

-- I look like sh*t.|-- No, you don't.

Yeah, I do.|I look like sh*t.

No, you don't.|You look beautiful.

That's easy for you to say.|You're pretty.

Oh, thanks, you know,

I just kind of|threw it together,|and, you know --

Ohh.

Aren't you, uh,|late for class, you know?

-- Yeah.|-- Yeah.

-- Yeah, I'll see|you guys later.|-- Okay.

## You're always dancing|down the street ##

Damn it.

## With your suede blue eyes ##

Suck my dick.

## Every new boy that you meet ##

## He doesn't know|the real surprise ##

## Here she comes again ##

## When she's dancing|'neath the starry sky ##

## Ooh, she'll make you flip ##

## Here she comes again ##

## When she's dancing|'neath the starry sky ##

## I kinda like|the way she dips ##

ln our exploration|of the text,

we will learn about|objectification,

subjugation,|and obfuscation.

Um, excuse me...

I think you're|in the wrong class.

This is Women's Studies 2b:|Femalehood ln Crisis.

Which satisfies my|"history of consciousness"|requirement, right?

Have a seat, please.

Mm-hmm.

The primary text|is my study,

"Histrionics|and the Male Demographic:

"Examination|of Gender Economics,

Oh.

-- Huhh!|-- Huhh!

Party last night|was awesome, bro.

Thanks for putting up|the cash.

Hey, whatever it takes|to preserve the reputation|of K.O.K.,

even if it means|paying for everything|out of my own pocket.

Ohh!

My collarbone!

Well, well, well.

Co-inky dinky,|my stinky pinky.

Here we are again.

Excuse me.

Phone moi.

Next class will be|a detailed discussion

on the myth|of the male orgasm.

-- To be prepared,|-- What the --

please read|chapters 1 through 1 6.

I strongly recommend|a study partner.

So, you know,|would you -- would|you like to, uh --

Fine.

Great.

Let it burn! Come on, people!|Work it!

Here it is again.|She goes up, and she is fouled hard.

Hey.|Oh, sh*t!

Oh! Ooh!

-- Sorry.|-- You startled old Roberta.

You shouldn't be watching|TV anyway, Roberta.

-- Ooh.|-- Your name's up|on the work wheel.

It's your turn|to clean the bathroom.

Okay.

Ugh.|I thought guys were pigs.

Plaque all over|the place...

Teeth scum...

What the hell is this?

What -- Oh, my God!

Goddamn! Ugh!

It's a f***in' Wookiee,|man.

Sick.

Oh! Ugh!

Man, these chicks|are disgusting.

Oh, great.

Ooh! Ooh!

Roberta!

Ooh...

It's okay.

It's all right, dear.|Shh.

Yeah.

Oh, s--|oh, oh, sorry.

Oh.

Some -- some -- some...

Some...

Some guy put this|on my desk in class today!

I am not deaf!

Well, we -- we should|all be so lucky.

Hey, listen. Listen.

Shh. Shh.

You -- you forget him.

Your voice has real...

real...

personality.

Really?!

Y-Y-Yes, it does.

Okay. Okay!

Now, listen,|you forget about him,

and you go and have|some fun -- fun, fun, fun.

-- Fat-ass dog girl!|-- Whoo!

Mother's ass!

Why do you let them|treat you like this?!

You can't be|a bunch of pussies...

...your whole lives!

I hate this place.

Whoo! PMS!

Uhh!

Hey, Doof...|what do you think of this?

I borrowed it from Leah.|Huh?

That is pretty.

Yeah?

Wish I could fit|into a size 6, man.

F*** all!

I can't take this!

Hey, what do you think|of this?

Do you think I'd look good|in this -- like a midriff|and the thing?

No, no. You need|something more that --

you know, something|that accentuates|your curves more.

What the f***|is going on here?!

What's your problem?

What's my problem?

Where do I f***in' start?

My bra's rubbing me raw,|I have a fat ass,

and I've twisted my ankle|three times today!

W-Why are you|wearing heels?

We're in college.|No one's wearing heels.

Heels are out, man --|last year. Hello.

Dude, they make my legs|look slimmer.

I have a fat ass.

No, you don't.

Yes, I do!

No, you don't.

Look, relax.|It's gonna be okay.

No, it's not gonna be|okay.

Look at this.

Ugh, dude.|Man, that is nasty, dude.

Oh, Jesus.|Uh, what is that?

I don't know.

Oh, my God.

Adina, those are the worst|ingrown hairs I've ever seen.

Any of you girls

have any heavy-flow|maxi pads I could borrow?

I soaked through|an entire box this morning,

and I had to use a whole|roll of toilet paper and --

Um...I used the last one.

Sorry.

I gotta go.

Bye.

That poor girl.

I mean, she's so big.

She's like Paul Bunyan, man.

Do you have any idea|what this will do to us?

Hmm?

We're not supposed to know|about makeup or periods

or self-esteem issues.

You're not supposed to see|behind the curtain.

Look, you go|to a restaurant, right?

It's your favorite place.|You've been going there|for years.

You order a bacon burger.

You don't want to|see some guy slit|a pig's throat,

toss it on top of|a dead cow -- no.

You --|you just want to|enjoy your meal.

I'm getting that tape.

I'm getting|a bacon burger, man.

Psst, psst!

Jimmy!

Who's there?

Ohh!

Bro!

-- Hey!|-- Bro, it's you! Oh, my God!|Where'd you go, man?

Everyone's been looking|for you!

Don't worry about it.|It's complicated. Listen, I --

Wait!|Bro, I have awesome news!

I did what you said.|I got a girl.

A skank --|I banged her five times,

and she was begging|for more!

No, you didn't.

I mean, that's great.|That's great, Jimmy.

No, no.

Wait, I --|you're shunned.

I am not supposed to be|talking to you.

Hey, hey.|Hey, who's your true bro?

Huh? Who told you|about skanks?|It was me, right?

Yeah.

Spence told me|you'd say that.

Look, forget what Spence|is saying, okay?|We've been framed.

He told me|you'd say that, too.

Look, Spence is a lying|prick with his ass hairs|caught in a twist.

He told me|you'd say that, too.

Jimmy!

Duh!

F***.

God.

No, sh--

Bad, bad, bad!

What the f***|are you doing, dipshit?

Hmm.

Oh!

## She's your adolescent dream ##

## Schoolboy stuff,|a sticky-sweet romance ##

## And she makes you|want to scream ##

-- Hmm...|-- ## Wishing you could get|inside her pants ##

## So you fantasize away ##

## While you're squeezing her ##

## You thought|you heard her saying ##

## "Good girls don't" ##

## "Good girls don't" ##

## But she'll be telling you,|"Good girls don't, but I do" ##

## So you call her|on the phone ##

## To talk about the teachers|that you hate ##

## And she says|she's all alone ##

## And her parents won't be|coming home till late ##

## There's a ringing|in your brain ##

## 'Cause you could've|sworn... ##

No, not there.

-- Aah!|-- ##... "Good girls don't" ##

Oh, isn't this fun?

##... "Good girls don't, "|but she'll be telling you... ##

Hey!

A little help, chunk.

## "...But I do" ##

Ohh!

No, I --|I can do better!

##... That you know|you can't erase ##

-- Oh.|-- ## Till she's sitting|on your face ##

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