South Park: Imaginationland Page #4

---

Right, then it was: Imagina-ation,

Imagina-ation. Imagina-atio-on.

It's open! It's open!

Getting readings

from the other side...

That's it. We've made an opening

to our imagination, sir!

All right, that's enough! We've

still got a lot of work to do, people!

It's time to go in

and get our imaginations

under control!

How much further to Castle Sunshine?

Snarf, I'm not sure snarf snarf.

I've never been.

- What was that?

- Over here.

Oh Christ.

It's Strawberry Shortcake.

Please, let me go.

Oh my God! Snarf.

Please! No more torture!

Just kill me! Just f***ing kill me!

Yes! Now kill her!

Whoa whoa, hang on, y'all. You can't

just kill her. That's not evil enough.

What do you mean?

We cut out her eyeball.

Yeah, that's super hardcore.

Now come on y'all.

We can do better than that.

Hey! I know!

Let's all pee in her empty eye socket!

Let's make her eat her own eyeball,

and then pee in her empty eye socket.

How about we get someone with AIDS

to pee in her eye socket,

so she dies all slowlike?

Nobody here has AIDS!

But we've got to have AIDS

before we pee in her eye socket!

Now don't be down y'all. I bet

we can find some AIDS out in the forest.

Dude, run, run, run!

All right, men.

We don't know what you'll experience

on the other side of this doorway,

but it will most

likely be really weird.

If you reach our imagination,

you are to take every step

necessary to get it under control!

- Are you ready?

- Yes sir!

Are you ready, Kurt Russell?

I... I don't understand why I'm here.

I'm just an actor.

Yes, but you were in that one

movie that was kinda like this.

That gives you more

experience than anybody.

All right, here we go! Men! Forward!

- Sir, we have a security breach!

- What?

There's an Unauthorized Entry Alert,

it's coming from Sector Two!

Sector Two?

Cartman?

Hello Kyle! Thought you could

get out of your responsibilities, huh?

- Who the hell are you?

- That kid you have made a bet

that if I could prove that I saw

a leprechaun, he would suck my balls!

Get him out of here!

No! Hold on a second!

I have a contract, validated

by the United States court system!

Let me see that!

Why would you agree

to suck someone's balls?

I didn't think there was going

to be a god-damned leprechaun!

All right,

you two can go use the conference room.

Go on, we have work to do here.

Wha? Well wait, I wanna

see what happens here!

You signed an agreement, kid. We don't

have time for this. Go on and do it.

- Stan?

- Dude, you did make a deal...

The conference room is which way?

Well, well, well. Here we are, Kyle.

You tried to bail out on our agreement,

but I found you.

I didn't "bail," I got

picked up by the government!

Well we're here now,

that's all that matters.

Care for some nuts?

Oh, that's right. I guess you'll

be chock full of nuts in a few minutes.

Cartman,

do you even know what's going on?

We went to Imaginationland,

terrorists attacked it,

and now the government is about to-

Oh jeez, I'm sorry, Kyle. It's just that

I'm so completely bored by this story.

See, I'm really only interested in

the part where the leprechaun was real,

and so you have to suck my balls.

Okay, fine. You know what?

Let's just get it over with!

Oh nonono, nononot so fast, Kyle.

I've waited a long time for this, and

I intend to savor each and every second.

No, I'm serious!

I wanna see what's happening

downstairs, so let's just do it!

Not... just yet, Kyle.

There's still a few things I need to do.

By the way, I should tell you

that I haven't had a chance

to shower while

making my way up here.

My balls are... extra vinegary...

Just get to it already!

- Entering the portal in five seconds.

- Kurt Russell, can I get a comm check?

Check 1, 2.

Good luck men! Godspeed!

What do we have?

Kurt Russell, can you hear me?

We're here. We're somewhere.

- They are inside the imagination, sir.

- What do you see in there?

There's lots of...

big mushrooms, colorful grass,

some castles in the distance, eh...

Wait...

Something's coming for us!

It's coming out of

the bushes and- It's a-!

Oh, Aw, it's just a cute

little squirrel. Hey, it talks!

- The little squirrel talks.

- Aw, an imaginary talking squirrel.

Ask the squirrel what it

knows about the terrorist attack.

Wait a minute, eh.

The squirrel has friends.

Oh why, why it's a whole

bunch of woodland critters.

Wait, woodland critters...

There's a talking bear

and a beaver, uh...

They seem to be Christmas critters.

Well hello. Yes, hi.

- Get them out of there!

- What?

- Tell them to get away now!

- What's the matter?

Oh the... cute little bear's

eyes are starting to glow red now...

Uh hello there, little animals,

do you happen to know how to huh?

Kurt Russell, what's going on?

They're raping me!

They're raping me!

Get out of there, Kurt Russell!

They're raping all of us!

Whoaho! Oh it hurts!

They're raping us and it hurts!

I was thinking of using a high-speed

shutter with a low depth of field.

- What do you think?

- Goddamnit Cartman,

will you stop wasting time?

I wanna get this over with!

No, you're right, Kyle.

A higher depth of field will

make sure everything stays in focus.

There we go.

Now, Kyle,

when you're sucking my balls,

are you gonna think about how

right I was about the leprechaun, or

are you just gonna try and focus on

how rough and salty

my balls feel in your mouth?

- Let's just do it!

- In time, Kyle.

You certainly are eager

for balls, aren't you?

Are you ball-famished?

Balls-starving?

You see, Kyle, I wonder if

at this moment you are actually-

- Everyone to the main hall now! Go!

- Uh, no, we're not done in here yet.

Everyone to the main hall now!

No! Goddamnit no!

Boy snarf snarf,

my feet are really getting tired snarf.

Aw, Sn-Snarf, could you maybe

like sh-shut up for five minutes?

Wait! There it is. We made it!

Castle Sunshine!

- Yeah!

- Snarf!

Hurry! Get inside!

The evil imaginary

characters are approaching!

Lock down the gates!

Prepare to fire the cannons!

Wait! Wait!

What imaginary character are you?

The Lollipop King?

From the Lollipop Forest?

And I'm Snarf.

Snarf, snarf snarf snarf.

And what imaginary

character are you?

Oh, uh, uh I'm not imaginary.

Ah I'm Butters.

What's a "Butters"?

The Mayor brought him and some

other kids into Imaginationland

before the terrorist attack.

So you came from the real world

at precisely the same

time as the terrorists!

That seems like quite a coincidence!

I, well I was just

playing with my friends,

and wu-we caught a leprechaun,

and then this guy-

You caught the Leprechaun? Take him!

Perseus!

He's not against us snarf snarf!

Talk to me! What's going on?

Something is... coming through

the gate from the other side.

What is it?

It's like a... half man half bear!

And half pig!

Oh! No, no wait!

It's like a half bear half manpig!

Look out!

No! I think it's more like a half man,

and half pigbear!

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes