South Park: Imaginationland Page #3

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Hey, let go of him!

We aren't going to hurt your little

friends. We just need information.

No! No, he has to suck my balls!

No!

Kyle!

No! No!

Hold on! Hold on a second!

Now, you really should think

about this. I mean, uh,

I know you think attacking

our imagination will get you somewhere,

but will it really?

If you destroy that wall,

all the most evil parts of

our imagination are gonna break loose,

but... will it really make

you terrorists feel better?

Maybe it's time for us all to just...

get along.

Jesus Christ, no!

That was your plan to stop them?

Yeah, and that's

not a heartfelt speech?

That's f***ing stupid!

They are coming...

Glad I picked you up, kid.

It's dangerous for someone

your age to be hitchhiking.

Yeah well,

when a man has been wronged...

he no longer cares about danger.

You going to Washington

to visit family?

I've got unfinished business.

You go through life

being told there's justice,

then you learn

that the only real justice...

is the justice you take.

Make no mistake, Kyle.

Before this is over,

you will suck my balls.

Oh, it was just a dream.

Come on, Butters. Mom's cooked

waffles and nanas for you.

Hoho! Mom, Dad,

I dreamt I was in Imaginationland

and terrorists attacked it.

You are in Imaginationland.

This is a dream.

- Huh?

- Hey, wake up, stupid!

Come on, wake up, kid!

No, wait! Uh I was back home in bed!

No! You passed out

and peed your pants!

Look! The evil of Imaginationland

is coming out!

Oh hamburgers!

Everyone!

Fall back to the Gumdrop Forest!

Come with me, little boy!

I'm going to get you home!

Wa! It's Alien!

Predator!

Look, we already told

you everything we know.

Some guy just showed up in a big balloon

and took us into Imaginationland.

What we want to know is how!

We need to find a way

into Imaginationland;

you've been there!

How did you do it?

We just... went on a balloon ride.

There must have been some

kind of portal or doorway.

- Dude, we don't remember.

- Do you realize what's going on here?

Terrorists have attacked

our imagination,

and now our imaginations

are running wild!

- You'd better start remembering!

- It was the Chinese, wasn't it?

What?

We've suspected

that the Chinese government

was working on a doorway

to the imagination.

Is that where you were?

- No.

- That's it, isn't it?

Where do the Chinese keep this portal?

How does it work?

It it better than ours?

Your what?

Our portal to the imagination

built as a secret project

back in 1962 to fight the Soviets-

Shhh! Tom!

That's super-secret.

Oh, I'm sorry sir.

Wait. The U.S. Government

has a portal to the imagination?

Aw, see? Good job, Tom!

Why don't you just tell

them everything about Project X?

Yes sir. We built

a portal to the imagination

to use against the Russians

during the Cold War, but we-

That was sarcasm! I was being

sarcastic, you f***ing idiot!

Aw jeez, I'm really sorry sir.

If you already built a doorway to the

imagination, then why do you need us?

All right, we might as well

show it to them. God-damnit, Tom.

Every night, the dream is the same.

I'm on my way to

visit my friend Kyle,

because we had a bet that if

I could prove leprechauns were real,

he would suck my balls.

And it turns out I was right.

Time to pay up, Kyle.

But then...

No!

No!

It's been taken from me.

I have dry balls...

Balls so dry they explode like dust.

You okay, kid?

No. I've got dry balls.

And I'm running out of time.

Ever since the Cold War,

the U.S. Government has

been working on a secret project

to build a doorway

into the imagination.

It is called

"Project Imagination Doorway."

That's not very imaginative.

According to all the tests and the data,

the doorway should work,

but... it never has.

But we're close, sir.

We're real close.

They've been saying

that for over forty years.

You're the ones, right? The kids

who have been in the imagination.

I guess.

What was the sequence

that got you inside?

We know there's some kind of resonance

code, but we can't figure it out.

Look, we're sorry, you guys,

but the balloon just went up in the air

and the dude sang a song

and we were suddenly there.

Song? You didn't say

anything about a song before.

- What song?

- The Imagination song.

The fractal converter

has never worked

because it was waiting

for a multitonal code!

Quick boys:
how does

the Imagination Song go?

Imagination...

Imagination...

Sir, uh I'm getting some

electrofeedback from the gate.

It's weak,

but it's nanoresponding to something.

Was there more to the Imagination Song?

How does the rest of it go?

Imagination... Imagina...

No, no dude, it went up there.

- Imagina...

- Imagina...

Dude, we don't remember.

It was really long and stupid.

I'm just about through playing with

you boys! We're running out of time!

You have to remember

that song in its entirety!

Mayor, Mayor,

what are we supposed to do?

Please, sir.

I have to get home to my world.

Oh, well.

All you have to do is tap

your heels together three times.

Really?

No, you f***ing dipshit,

that was a joke!

Mayor, what are we supposed to do,

snarf snarf?

Get to Castle Sunshine!

It's your only hope!

Castle Sunshine?

Through the Gumdrop Forest.

Others will be hiding there; go, run!

Look out for the evil characters!

They're assembling

on the Yum Yum mountain!

We are free!

Now all of Imaginationland is ours!

Not all, foolish orc!

There are still parts of Imaginationland

we don't control.

Tomorrow, we shall build

our own castle right on this spot!

Who put you in charge, Krueger?

I am the most evil character here!

Nonsense! Your evil is stale.

I am the most evil

imaginary character!

Now come on y'all.

We shouldn't be fighting,

we're supposed to all be

on the same side.

Yeah. You're all right,

Squirrelly Squirrel.

Yay!

What evil imaginary

characters are they?

They were dreamt up

by some fourth grade kid

as part of his Christmas Story.

Now come on y'all.

We can't waste time arguing,

there could still be

survivors out there.

We need to hunt them down,

and kill them.

- And eat their flesh!

- But first we should rape them!

How about we kill them,

and then rape their bodies

so we can use their blood

as lubricant.

Say, that's a great idea,

Beary Bear.

Man, I do not want to meet

the kid that dreamt those things up.

Look, I want some Goddamn answers!

You brought my friend

here to Washington!

Where is he? What is going on?

I'm sorry, sir.

That information is classified.

Something is going on, and I have

a right to know where my friend is!

There's somebody asking a lot

of questions about what's going on.

Let me handle this!

I'm sorry, but there is no such

thing as Project Imagination Doorway!

Imagination Doorway.

It was started in the Sixties

as a secret government project.

Right.

Imagina-a-ation, Imagina-

Wait, maybe that's where he went really

flat, like that half-step key change?

Imagina-ation.

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