Space Chimps 2: Zartog Strikes Back Page #4

would somehow pay off one day.

All right, show me what else it can do.

Well, it's a de-particle-izer.

So it pretty much only

de-particle-izes things.

But that never gets old. Watch this.

Ah!

Think of the savings

on furniture polish and tech support.

What else can we make disappear?

[Gasps]

What about an entire country?

funnykiddy rip for Subscene.com

Or an entire planet.

I could use that thing to get rid of Ham.

I love it! I want to run

a live demonstration for Congress.

Or maybe a demonstration on Congress.

[Chortling]

Ah, schnitzelfruit. They're the most

scrumptious fruit in all the land.

Here. You want to try one?

- This is delicious.

- I thought you'd like it.

Oh! They don't make

fruit like that back home.

- Oh?

- Oh! [Groans]

Ah. This place is perfect.

On my planet, we only give schnitzelfruit

to very special friends.

- [Giggling]

- [Chuckles]

What?

Glophoppers. Awesome!

This is so weird. Huh.

- [Laughs]

- Ooh.

They do feel like Jell-O.

Come on, Comet. This way.

You're gonna love this.

Uh, sir, uh, we were wondering...

are we supposed to be

exploring space or blowing it up?

What's the difference? You're supposed

to do what you're told, not ask questions.

Huh!

How many of these have you made?

- Just the prototype.

- Uh-huh.

So just the one

that the freaky blue alien...

is pointing at us right now?

Yecch. What is that?

Wow, look at that.

Come on, come on. Hurry up.

- Wow.

- Let's go, slowpoke.

I am Zartog...

the rightful ruler of planet Malgor...

and soon-to-be ruler of planet Earth.

And I know a good weapon when I see one.

Now tell me where your leader, Ham, is...

or I will blast you all into oblivion!

[Gibberish]

Anybody understand him?

[Gibberish]

- Whoa!

- [Chuckles] Whoa.

Come on, Comet. Jump in!

What are these things called?

Whatever you want.

How about bouncy-shrooms?

Maybe, uh, jump-shrooms.

Or, no. Uh, fungaroos!

I like it!

Boing! Boing!

Boing!

[Giggling]

Tag! You're it.

- Hey!

- You'll never catch me.

Oh, yes, I will.

Hey, no fair. My arms are too short.

- Told you you couldn't.

- Got ya! Now you're it.

[Gibberish]

I think he's speaking an alien language.

[Gasps]

I'll make first contact.

- [Beeping]

- Huh?

- Speed that up.

- [Beeping Melody]

Perhaps he speaks

the universal language...

of super-cool dance.

Are you trying to say,

"Get jiggy with me"?

[Hip-hop Beat]

[Continues]

This is how we do it

at Mission Control

Break it down now.

Take it downtown.

Do the moonwalk. Watch me. Watch me.

Add a solar flare.

Breathe compressed air.

[Breathing Loudly]

End with a glide.

Like a rocket ride.

[Lmitating Rocket Blastoff]

I say "Hubble." You say "Telescope."

Hubble.

Huh?

Don't leave me hanging.

[Poole Gasps]

[Ends]

- Anybody?

- [Groans]

Hey. You can't point that at me.

I oversee the department that funds-

Oh!

How dare you!

I'll have you know that

I'm an institution in this institu-

[Kilowatt Giggling]

- [Kilowatt] Whee!

- Oh, check me out!

This is so going on my blog.

- Uh, what's a blog?

- Whee!

- Oh! Be careful.

- I'm on top of the world!

No!

- Whoa!

- Oh, Comet! Oh, no.

[Whimpering]

Whoo!

[Laughs]

Comet, where are you?

You're okay.

- You- Don't ever do that again!

- Ha, ha!

- Huh? Heh.

- He de-particle-ized the senator.

So much for government oversight.

- Maybe we can bring the senator back.

- [Gibberish]

Start talking.

How do I use my new weapon

to destroy planet Malgor?

And where is your leader, Ham?

[Gibberish]

- [BananaBerry Beeping]

- [Creature Snuffling]

Earth to Comet.

Comet to Earth. Come in, Earth.

- Comet! Thank goodness.

- Little buddy.

Are you okay, kid?

Uh, uh, not "kid." Uh, person.

N- Uh, tween. No. Chimp.

Did I just put my foot in my mouth?

Tastes like hair.

Comet- [Chuckles]

Uh, are you all right?

- I'm great. I'm on Malgor.

- Hi, Luna!

Hi, Houston. Hello, Ham.

Hey, Kilowatt. Comet, my man.

Dude, I didn't think

you were ready for the cannon...

and now you're on an alien planet.

So, what's Malgor like this time of year?

It's better than I ever dreamed about.

How, why and when did you blast off?

Yeah, about that.

I was just sitting in the rocket,

and the autopilot just took over.

Ah, but don't worry. Everything's chill.

Chill? You mean

the atmospheric temperature on Malgor is low?

Oh, it's great here.

We're having so much fun.

- Tell them about when-

- [Laughing]

- When we were on the fluvian-

- And after l-

and you almost fell off!

Uh, do you have enough oxygen?

Oh, wait. And you remember

when we were on the jump-shrooms?

Hey, come in, Comet. Whoa. What's wrong?

I think you have to be there.

- Hang tight, kid- uh, Comet.

- [Laughing Continues]

We'll get you home in one piece.

Oh, don't worry about me.

I'll fly back in a week.

- Or three. Uh, T.T.F.N.

- [Laughing]

T.T.F. - What? What's wrong with him?

Honey- [Sniffles]

Our teenager is growing up. [Crying]

It happened so fast.

Guess who I just ran into.

- Old Zartog.

- Huh?

- [Others] Zartog?

- Nice guy. I gave him a tour of the place.

Gave him Level 5 clearance

to Mission Control.

Oh, you should've been there.

It was hilarious.

He stole a device that de-particle-izes

matter, annihilated the senator...

and then announced plans

for the end of the Earth and Malgor.

Hi-larious!

- You did what?

- [Both] He did what?

I did what?

Luna, pull up the spy cam

in Mission Control.

Hit "Command Option 3."

[Growls]

- Holy cow!

- Titan, have you lost your marbles?

- Now tell me how

to blow up a planet with this thing.

- [Gasps]

Oh, no! What have I done?

Oh, not much- just gave Zartog

a way to destroy the entire planet.

I'm going to destroy Ham...

and all the rest of the hairy,

smelly little Earthlings.

I'm thinking our decision to bring

a Freznar-encased alien back to Earth-

big mistake!

Say good-bye, Earth nerds.

[Gibberish]

I know he's speaking alien,

but did he just call us nerds?

I think, actually,

he said something about flour tortillas.

- Just a hunch.

- Hmm.

I thought he said, "Take me

to your all-you-can-eat ice-cream sundae bar."

[Gibberish]

Uh, you know, it may need to go outside

and go to the bathroom.

Where is Ham?

Ah!

[Both Yelp]

Oh. I'm being de-particle-ized...

and having my D.N.A. Transmogrified.

Malgor is next!

[Shrieking]

[Groaning]

- Kilowatt!

- I'm okay.

Need a minute.

[Grunts, Spluttering]

[Sighs]

Head shorted out. Happens.

- Ham, we need a plan.

- Right.

We've got a tech problem

with that zapper...

and we need

our tech genius to fix it.

I thought you guys didn't need me.

[Houston] We'll be toast

if we don't have you back here pronto.

Comet, you are mission critical.

Comet, get here fast.

[Beeping]

If Zartog's got some

sort of de-particle-izer...

I could lose my friends forever.

Ham, Luna, Titan, Houston- everybody.

They could all disappear.

I could be their only hope.

I have to go back.

I know. They're your friends,

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