Space Jam Page #3

ifyou don't show up.

Think he's all right? l hate to leave him.

He's fine. l think he just had to

get away from that Stan character.

He's pathetic, isn't he?

l'll give us both twos. We weren't in

any kind of emotional state to putt.

l think that's fair.

lf Mike is gone, the NBA is

going to need some new people.

There's room at the top.

An exciting guy

who could even perform at half-time.

You know David Stern?

A phone call from you....

l want to help...

...but l haven't played in a long time.

My timing's off.

We'll fix it.

Look at our facility.

We got hoops.

We got weights.

We've got balls.

You sure do. This place is a mess.

You're worried about a mess?

There's nothing here a little

spit shine wouldn't fix.

Spit shine!

Lemony-fresh.

You guys are nuts.

Correction:
We're Looney Tunes.

And as such are the exclusive property

and trademark of Warner Bros. lnc.

l'm here!

Me too!

That hurt.

Who are they?

Remember the tiny aliens l told you about?

You've heard of the Dream Team?

We're the Mean Team, wussieman!

Wussieman.

We're the Monstars.

M-o-n-....

Let's see what you got...

...chump!

l don't play basketball anymore.

''l don't play basketball anymore.''

Maybe you're chicken.

l say, l resemble that remark.

You calling me chicken?

Come here.

Here you go. Take him!

Watch the footwork.

Can you believe it?

Get out of the way!

Everybody.

Look at your hero now.

You guys are making a mistake.

You're all washed up, baldy!

Baldy?

He is not washed up!

-Michael's the greatest!

-Shut up!

My poor little cranium.

You okay?

Yeah, are you okay?

Whoops!

You're not scared of them...

...are you?

Let's play some basketball.

You're...!

You're Charles Barkley.

Girls! Come on over! Hurry up! Hurry!

Look! lt's Charles Barkley!

Can l play?

You're not Charles Barkley.

Just a wanna-be who looks like him.

Sorry.

Break out.

You shouldn't even be here! Be gone!

Wanna-be! Be gone!

Just a few more tests.

Electrolyte levels,

glucose, CBCs, RBCs, etc.

And we've scheduled a stress test...

...and neurological battery

to include EEG and....

And this girl...

...five feet nothing, blocked my shot.

When did you first have this dream?

lt wasn't a dream! lt really happened!

lt climbed up my back...

...and into my brain.

Are there other areas...

...besides basketball...

...where you find yourself...

...unable to perform?

No!

Just asking.

l've been MRl'd, EKG'd,

x-rayed, laser beamed....

l'll never swear again.

l'll never get another technical.

l'll never trash-talk.

l've got other skills.

l could go work on the farm.

Really?

Or maybe l could go back to

the jungle and be a missionary.

What are you saying?

That l'm trying to disobey my mama?

You said that, not me.

l love her.

Still can't find anything wrong!

Maybe nothing's wrong!

Maybe it's just in our head.

We're fine. lt's psychosomatic.

Or has to do with the moon.

l'll never date Madonna again.

What are you doing?

l'm fixing a divot.

He's fixing a divot!

Has anyone here ever played basketball?

l have.

l'd like to try out.

Hi. My name is Lola Bunny.

Lola?

Hello!

My name's Bugs.

You want to play one-on-one, doll?

''Doll''?

On the court, Bugs.

She's hot!

Ready?

l got it! l got it!

That girl's got some skills.

Don't ever call me...

...''doll.''

Check!

Nice playing with you.

Very smooth.

She's obviously nuts about me.

Obviously.

Mais oui.

Where's the ball?

Let's do some drills.

Can anyone lend me some sneakers?

Sneakers?

Sorry.

Someone must get my gear

from my house.

Your house?

ln 3-D land?

Whatever you do...

...remember my North Carolina shorts.

Your shorts? From college?

l wore them under my Chicago Bulls

uniform every game.

l washed them after every game!

l did!

The view back here stinks.

We're in front of his house.

l knew that!

Let's go in this way.

l say, let's go in that way!

He just never learns!

Let me see.

l must be very, very...

...close.

Mother!

Nice digs.

Well, well. l wonder who that could be.

Twinkle, twinkle, little star.

Everyone's sleeping!

l knew that.

Come on, we must find

Michael's basketball stuff.

Nope. Nothing in here.

Nope.

But a very nice dinette set.

Not here.

Let's look upstairs.

Yes, Oh, Fearless Leader.

So, he needs his special underwear.

Sorry.

You think she's got enough toys?

Speaking of toys,

you know all those mugs and...

...lunch boxes with our pictures on them?

You ever see any money from it?

-Not a cent.

-Me neither.

lt's a shame.

We need a new agent.

We're getting screwed.

We've found the trophy room.

Spread out and search the place.

Yes, sahib.

Oh, brother.

Here l am, in the peak of my form...

...playing second banana to

some sort of harebrain....

This could be useful.

lf this were a union job....

That's very nice.

-l could use this.

-One of his shoes.

Where is the other shoe?

Where are you?

Eureka!

Come to Papa.

What a fuzz-foot. You are so clumsy.

Catch.

Thanks.

Time to go.

Did we get everything?

The shorts!

ln there?

Okay, l'll check.

l found the shorts.

The pain!

l'm right behind you.

That's not reassuring.

Nice puppy.

Want a bone?

No dice.

How about a nice ham?

Can't we talk this over?

Down, Beethoven.

The kids are here.

Give it.

Here.

Thanks, kid.

Bad dog!

That is the last time l'm ever

working with dogs or children.

Where you going?

You see, the Looney Tunes have a

big basketball game coming up and...

-...your dad's playing.

-All right!

Yeah! But don't tell anybody!

l see aliens.

Little aliens from outer space.

They forced their way inside your bodies.

They need your talent to win a...

...basketball game against...

...Bugs Bunny.

l also see Michael Jordan...

...being sucked down a golf hole...

...by furry creatures.

That's it. We're going.

We're leaving.

Let's try acupuncture.

Good idea.

This is it! This is it!

l don't know where you are...

...but you obviously enjoy being

there more than being with me!

You better hope this Jordan

character still can play.

You and me both, brother.

Listen, how is this for a new team name:

The Ducks.

Please!

What kind of Mickey Mouse

organization would name a team that?

So sue me. lt's just a suggestion.

You're doing it!

You're becoming mighty!

Go!

No pain, no gain.

Guys?

Look who's finally ready to play!

Let's see if l remember how.

ls it really you?

Thank God you're all right!

l was so worried!

Come on, Stan. Don't hug me, please.

Sorry.

-Why are you here?

-l must take you back for practice.

l can't. l'm helping my friends

in their basketball game.

Your friends are cartoon characters.

Yeah. So?

lt doesn't bother me.

Let me help? Let me help! l can help!

What can you do?

l may not be tall, but...

...l'm slow.

And large.

And a dork!

l'll do anything! Anything!

Anything?

Anything.

Come here. Come here for a second.

Sit right here.

No problem.

All right! All right, let's go, team!

lf someone gets injured,

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