Stand Up and Cheer! Page #2

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in Class 10-A, Department "B"...

with a double-X rating

in my card index system.

And my system is the preeminent

beauty catalog of today.

Height, 5'4". Weight, 116.

Bust, 34. Waist, 26.

Hips, 36. Calf, 12 and 1 y2.

Ankles, 7.

Questioning my judgment.

That is good.

I'm really awfully sorry, Mr. Cromwell.

Never mind. Never mind.

Just let it be a lesson to you.

Get my New York office, please.

You're so very busy, Mr. Cromwell.

Don't you think-

- Oh, no. Stay where you are.

I haven't a thing to do.

Yes. Yes, of course

I want London, England.

Our European agent, Morris Feinberg.

Savoy Hotel. Okay.

- Yes. Now, Miss Jefferson, I'll

tell you what I want- - Adams.

Oh, yes.

- How do you like it here?

- Oh, very much.

It's all so interesting.

I think it's going to be much more

interesting now that you're here.

Oh, I mean, uh-

I mean, with the children and all that.

- You love children, don't you?

- Yes. I'm crazy about them.

Mm. So am I.

I used to be one myself.

- You rang, Mr. Secretary?

- Note to all departments:

"Suggestions from employees

for improving the service...

of the Department of Amusement

will be welcomed by the secretary. "

- That's all.

- Yes, sir.

I have a suggestion to make,

Mr. Secretary.

- Fine. Fine, what is it?

- You're working too hard.

- You think so?

- Positively. It isn't good for you.

Now, now.

This isn't the children's division.

No, I mean it. You're going

all the time,just like a machine.

Seeing hundreds

of people daily, losing sleep...

eating sandwiches in your office.

Don't you ever stop

for a real meal?

No. But that's an idea.

Suppose you and I have dinner tonight?

- Well, I-

- Fine. Fine. I'll call for you at 7:00.

For heaven's sake, let's select a caf

where there's no entertainment.

- This is going to do you a lot of good.

- You're telling me.

Cancel that last order

to motion picture producers.

Yes, sir.

The eastern papers.

Look at that. Look at that!

Wonderful cooperation from the press.

They've been with us from the start.

I know the department's going

to be a tremendous success.

Why they're laughing from

the Atlantic to the Pacific.

- Now, Scotty, do you know what your line is?

- Yes.

What is it?

That's it.

And then what do you say to them?

That's right.

Now get in your positions.

Put your hands

on each other's shoulders.

That's it. That's fine.

- Now, you'll all be back tomorrow at 4:00-

- Yes, Miss Adams.

and you'll know your lines

perfectly, won't you?

- Yes, Miss Adams.

- All right now.

You've all been very good

children today...

so I have a surprise for you.

- What is it? What do you have?

- Help yourselves.

Here, Maryanne.

There's one for you.

- Yes.

- Mr. George Bernard Shaw.

Send Mr. Shaw in.

George Bernard Shaw?

Yassuh.

- You're a little sunburned, aren't you?

- Yassuh, but...

see, I'm an outdoor man.

All right. Get outdoors.

No. No!

Now, boss,you're gonna need somebody

to help you-

Hello?

Zone 14. Okay.

Two dozen orchestras.

Two-and-a-half dozen

extra trombone players.

Zone 35, six dozen whirling Arabs,

Have my New York office get the complete score

and manuscript from last night's opening.

Believe I'm gonna like this place, sir.

All I gotta do is get used

to your likes and dislikes.

- No.

- You need somebody who can do...

Shim Sham Shimmy

with words and feet?

- No.

- Everybody's doin' it now.

I carry this board

so I don't spoil the rug.

It'll all fall off...

Folks like me.

Like that.

I need someone to stand at that door

when my secretary's at lunch...

to keep the wrong

kind of people out.

- Can you handle the job?

- If you tell me.

- You wouldn't let anybody get by?

- Nossuh.

Nobody can get by now

nohow, 'cause...

last three years I just

been barely gettin' by myself.

All right.

You're on duty.

All right, sir.

I won't let nobody by because

you say you don't want nobody in here.

I'll see nobody get by.

Now he didn't get by me, boss.

I got by him.

Yassuh, but I's startin' now.

Without any ifs, ands or buts,

we've got to see to it...

that this new

Department of Amusement is a failure.

But why take it so seriously?

Because we've made millions

of dollars worth of contracts...

based on the continuance

of the depression.

If Cromwell succeeds, if the mood and

temperament of the people become optimistic...

prosperity will arrive with a bang

and that will ruin us.

If he succeeds, yes,

but how can he affect the public at large?

After all he's only a showman,

sort of glorified town clown.

You're wrong there.

He's the man of the hour.

Not only is this country

watching him...

but the eyes of the world

are upon him and his efforts.

Moreover, he believes

in himself and in his work.

He's a man with a mission.

I've talked with him. I know.

It shouldn't be so difficult

to stop him.

Simply find the woman in his life.

No good with Cromwell.

He's spent his life...

in the company of the most

beautiful women in the world.

- He's not exactly a chump.

- Have you any ideas?

Yes, and rather ambitious ones...

but they require

organization and propaganda.

We must attack Cromwell

from every source-

the printing press,

political forums, the radio.

I've got you.

A campaign of ridicule.

Yes. The world is full

of pussyfoots, bluenoses and killjoys.

Laughter and gaiety

are their archenemies.

It shouldn't be hard to make them see

the hand of the devil...

in Cromwell's program

of national nonsense.

We'll put up millions

in cash to back our scheme...

and leave no stone unturned

until Cromwell is defeated.

Daddy! What are we waiting for?

We're waiting for

Miss Adams to send for us.

Oh. Will it be very long?

No, not very long-

Maybe a couple of hours.

Oh.

I got a surprise for you.

Close your eyes.

Hold out your hand.

- Oh!

- Now don't swallow it all at once.

Don't I get a kiss?

Yes.

Here. You sit right there.

Daddy's gonna telephone.

- All right. Bye.

- Good-bye.

Look at my apple!

Well, young lady,

what are you doing?

- I'm with my daddy.

- Where is your daddy?

- In Miss Adams' office.

- In Miss Adams' office?

Well, I guess we'd better go find him.

There now. Be careful

to get your feet in the stirrups.

That's right.

Now take hold of the reins...

and away we'll go

for a brisk canter.

Ah.

Come on there now.

- How's that?

- Whoa.

I like you.

And I like you.

I thought you said your father...

was going to come up

and meet you here in my office.

- Well, I wonder where he is.

- Downstairs.

Oh. What did you say

his name was again?

- Mr. James Dugan.

- Mr. James Dugan.

That's a nice name.

Do you suppose if I telephoned downstairs,

he'd come up here?

- Yes. I think so.

- All right. I'll do that.

I'm afraid, Mr. Dugan,

that I can't help you...

as much as I'd like to.

You see, Secretary Cromwell

has made it a strict rule.

Aw, come on. Isn't there some way

I can get in to see him?

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