Starsky & Hutch Page #8

- I don't really...

I don't have a character.

I don't do voices.

We're going upstairs. People will

recognize us if we don't have a character.

- Think of something.

- Okay.

Buck up, let's do it.

How are you? How's it going?

All right. How you doing? All right.

Look at these two hot chickens.

Finkel wants some dinkle. Give it to me.

Come on. Do it.

Lay it on, right here. Do it. Do it.

He means a kiss. We're doing

little voices. Undercover.

Come on, sweetie. Do it.

- That's a sweet little pucker. I love it.

- Can I get you two a drink?

You sure can, sweetheart.

Johnnie Red, neat.

- Okay.

- Do it. Do it.

All right. And you?

- Do it. Bacardi and cola. Do it, do it.

- Okay. I'll be right back.

- What are you doing?

- What?

- What was that? You just stole my voice.

- No, I didn't.

You gotta come up with your own voice.

That's my thing.

- I don't have a cool voice like you.

- Come up with a character.

You're a Texas oil tycoon guy.

You have, like, a moustache...

Don't shame me.

Let's sit down. Come on.

So we can get down to business and then

get back to the business of getting down.

Now, that's what I'm talking about.

Let's get down!

Captain Doby, you're not right.

But today is right.

Can I see a show of hands?

I'm talking to everyone in this room.

How many of us have made a mistake?

- Guilty.

- Yeah.

You know, I believe it was our buddy

Bill Shakespeare who said...

..."To err is human, but to forgive,

well, that's right on. "

That's exactly why

we're here today.

Because everyone out there

deserves a second chance. Everyone.

Thank you. I didn't say it.

Bill Shakespeare did.

Some of these guys were

in our surveillance.

- I know.

- Check out the guy behind us.

Already did.

You think he's got the stuff here?

- Where?

- I'd like to thank Bay City Volkswagen...

...for donating seven brand-new cars

to our annual fundraising raffle.

Thank you, Bay City Volkswagen.

Okay, everybody. Go ahead,

pull out your ticket stubs.

Hope you held onto it. Hate to have your

number called and have it left behind.

Because this train's

leaving the station.

Tonight's first winner. 63.

- Hot damn, that baby's mine!

- Congratulations.

That's one of his guys.

- Thank you very much.

- Just wait here.

We've got a winner, a new car owner.

Let him hear it.

He's gonna ride home in class.

The car. Cocaine is in the car.

He's doing it in front of everybody.

- He's not that stupid.

- No, but he's that arrogant. Trust me.

Number 117.

- Go.

- Right on! Yeah.

Yes!

- Thank you very much.

- Sit. Now. Do it. Do it.

Old Shakes McGinty did it!

Yes! Unbelievable!

I'm a-richer, and I'm gonna kiss you.

Get your hands off. I think...

I don't...

My friend won. Give him the car. Do it.

- Do what?

- The kid's from Texas.

I don't know if he has a license.

He rides a horse.

Do you have a ticket?

I need it to give you the car.

- You gotta trust the kid.

- I can't, cowboy.

I need to see the ticket.

Pop the trunk.

Let's get that new car smell.

- Who wants a whiff of that new car smell?

- Let's smell it!

That's what I'm talking about. Come on.

Pop the trunk. Seriously, do it. Do it.

- Do it.

- Listen, jackass.

Either give me a ticket or get the

hell off the stage. You dig that?

- Guys.

- Pop the trunk, candy man.

You heard him.

Pop it.

What the hell are you two doing?

Pop it!

You screwed it up once already, Starsky.

Like you said, Feldman,

everyone deserves a second chance.

What have we here?

Does this look familiar? Some cocaine.

Captain Doby, I suggest you take

this to the lab, get it analyzed...

- Hutch!

- All right, freeze! Everybody, freeze!

- Put your hands where I can see them!

- Relax, pal. Relax!

- Let's do it!

- Put that gun down or I'll kill your friend.

- Reese, what are we doing?

- Do it now! Put it down!

I got a clean shot.

I need permission.

No! No, Starsky.

I can do it. Just move

your head to the left.

No can do. You don't have my permission,

partner. I can't give it to you.

- Your nuts are mine, Feldman.

- No, they're not! Your nuts are yours.

Starsky, listen to me. I don't wanna die.

And I'm not giving you my permission.

Please, put it down.

Put it down. Down.

Okay. All right. You're right.

It's too close.

Oh, thank God.

Stay down!

Doby?

- Come on, let's move it! Let's go!

- What?

Walk away. Walk away. Let's go.

- Cap, are you okay?

- Yeah, I just got my wing clipped.

- Who the hell shot me?

- I'm sorry. I was trying to get...

Starsky! It was Reese Feldman.

Reese Feldman hit you, the son of a b*tch.

Well, go get him!

- Is somebody coming?

- No, we're on vacation.

- What's going on?

- Gotta go.

Oh, my God!

- Baby, look out!

- Look, I wanna hit him!

- You okay?

- Yeah!

- Watch out for the bunker!

- I don't know what a bunker is!

It's a sand trap.

- Go faster!

- I'm going fast. I got it floored.

- Dogleg right up here on the par three.

- What?

- Watch the bunker!

- What bunker?

Jesus!

Come on. Pay attention.

Hey! Get out of here!

- Move that ice cream truck now!

- No, you move.

- Bay City P.D. Move it!

- Let's go.

Grab those and meet me

in the marina. Let's go. Move!

If you guys are cops,

let's see some badge.

- We don't have any badges.

- Show him your gun.

Come on! Come on, move!

- Come on, hurry up, let's go!

- They're coming!

Come on, these two with the running

and the chasing. Stop! Go home.

Goodbye, heroes!

- To the shipping yard!

- Got a boat?

- No, but I got an idea.

Hey, watch out!

- Okay, now what?

- Okay, we're gonna take this car...

...and land it on that boat.

- You wanna crash the car into his boat?

- No, I wanna land it on that boat.

Now, go.

- Go!

- I can't do it.

This is unbelievable. Here you get

me out here to risk my life...

...and now you tell me you

can't do this? I'm a quitter, but...

- You're crying again.

- I'm not crying. This is different.

It's my mother. She always used to say that

this was too much car for me to handle.

- She said that?

- Couldn't handle the V8.

- I don't know, maybe she was right.

- Hey, look at me. Look at me.

I am not your mother.

I'm your partner.

Now, go!

Go!

- Things could go pretty wrong, so I...

- Keep your eyes on the road.

Listen to me, Ken. If we don't make it,

this... You know, us...

- It's been good.

- It's been great.

Now, will you stop talking

and hit that boat.

It's not a boat, it's a yacht.

Son of a b*tch!

- Come on, are you kidding me?

- Oh, my God. We almost just got killed.

Thanks for pointing out something

I couldn't notice. You're a benefit to have.

We should save them.

- Son of a b*tch!

- Nice plan!

You gave it too much gas

and you overshot it.

- Car has a lot of horsepower. I'll go get it.

- What are you doing? Stop it.

Starsky!

- It hasn't hit the bottom yet.

- Stop, stop, damn it! Listen to me.

It's gone, okay? It's over.

- But it's my car.

- I know it is, partner. I know it is.

Oh, my God, honey.

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