Suburban Gothic Page #4

Listen, I've got drum practice

tonight so...

Maybe another time.

Cool.

And I give the b*tch

a skosh of chloroform

and all of the sudden,

I'm the bad guy.

What's up, f*ggot?

Yo. What's up, dudes?

Cool shirts.

Hey, look, I-I'm really

dehydrated right now

and I don't want any trouble.

Seriously?

Well, There's three of us

and only one of you,

and we don't give a f***

what you want so...

The good news is, I'm gonna be

in town for awhile.

So if you want to take the day

off from threatening me, that...

Carl!

Let him go. Let him go.

Let him go.

He's pretty f***ed up.

Raymond, pop the trunk.

Pop the trunk!

I thought you shipped off

to the peace corps.

I'm shipping out tonight.

I had to get my sh*t.

I'm glad I'm seeing you

'cause...

Ever since I saw you last time,

I've had this really bad feeling

in the pit of my stomach.

- What do you mean?

- I don't know, you just...

you seem really distraught

and confused.

You know, and I just want you

to know...

I've been there.

Cool. Thanks. I... thank you.

You got to take a good, long,

honest look at yourself

in the mirror, you know,

and just...

and just say to yourself,

"I'm okay with this," you know?

Say, "I love myself.

I'm o-I'm okay like this."

- It's about acceptance.

- Okay.

Can I ask you a question?

It gets better.

Um, I really don't know what

You're talking about right now,

but I'm agreeing with you

kind of just to be polite.

I get... 'cause...

'cause You're gay.

N No, I... oh.

No, I'm not. I'm not.

- Really?

- Yeah.

Not gay. Straight.

'Cause you seem so gay.

I take it as a compliment.

Anyway, what is with you?

Why are you so sad?

If I tell you, do you promise

you won't make fun of me?

- I never know.

- You never know.

Well, ever since

I've been back home,

I've been having

these flashbacks

to, like, spirits that

I used to see when I was a kid,

coupled with, like, strange,

supernatural sensations.

- Oh, my g...

- You okay?

You okay?

Just wait a second. Just...

I see things, too.

Don't tell anybody.

Are you serious?

I think You're seeing spirits

that haven't crossed over

to the other side.

No, but I'm not seeing ghosts.

I'm not seeing anything.

I'm just have strange...

that doesn't matter.

From the sound of it

You're going to see them.

They're reaching out to you,

and when they do,

You're gonna have to figure out

what they want.

This sounds like

a major inconvenience.

Oh, you have no idea.

You have no idea.

Ghosts only communicate

when they want something.

And they can visit you

in any form they want.

Aah! I mean, they can be

a man, a woman.

It could be human,

it could be a horrible monster.

Get off the car.

Get off the car.

Get in the car.

Get in the car.

Okay.

Now, this...

This is an evil-eye pendant.

Okay? It's gotten me out

of a lot of hairy situations.

I want you to use it

to protect yourself.

- Okay.

- Here.

Always use protection.

Okay?

Yeah.

Don't just...

put it in your pocket.

Oh, yeah.

Don't lose it.

And lunge.

Lunge. Lunge.

And, yes, yes.

Okay.

And up. And up.

And bring it down.

And down. And down.

And down.

And, ooh, yeah.

And two. And three.

And lunge.

Lunge.

And yes, yes.

Pull it back.

Hey, dad.

You're a total f***ing creep.

And that's a fact.

Huh!

Raymond!

- Come in.

- Hi.

Come here, honey.

Look, it's Mrs. Richards.

Look at you!

Oh, my God, all fancy,

coming down from the big city

to grace us with your presence.

Oh, yeah, and your mom tells me

You're looking for work.

Yep.

Looking for work.

Can't find a job.

- Mm.

- Thanks for bringing that up.

Honey, it's networking.

Um, you know,

I Can't put my finger on it

but just the other day,

someone was telling me

that Dave's doing really good.

You must be proud.

Oh, I am so proud.

Hey, wait. Look at this.

Check this out.

Here's my handsome man.

So f***ing handsome.

And you know what I've always

found most handsome about him?

His thick fingers.

Excu excuse me?

Very thick fingers.

I've always been envious.

You know, he's a teacher now.

Oh, really? A teacher? Wow.

It has given him such...

Direction, focus, purpose.

Direction, focus, and purpose.

What more could you want?

- And, oh...

- Hold on.

Do you hear that? I got to go.

- Okay, look.

- I kn... I know...

- I know, I have to talk to you.

- I know, I know.

There is something wrong

with him.

He's just really

sensitive, honey.

So, break's over, ladies.

Okay.

- Hop to it!

- Let's go.

And, go!

And up. And do it.

Mom! Y...

- Raymond!

- What?

What are you screaming about?

- There's something in the drain!

- What?

Hey, did you eat

my ice-cream cake?

- Donald.

- Huh?

Raymond?

Did you?

Yeah, I did.

He did. He ate it.

Yeah. Sorry.

Yeah, he did.

I knew it. I knew it.

- God damn it.

- Donald...

Raymond, you know how much

I love that ice-cream cake.

Oh oh, Donald.

Honey, You're not even...

What are you screaming

all over the goddamn place for

all the time?!

Did you find anything?

Did I not warn you not to get

your mother worked up?

Dad, there was somebody

or something in my room.

You have to believe me.

Something?

Somebody?

No, There's nothing!

There's nothing in this room!

- Dad, I saw it with my own eyes.

- Nothing!

- There never was.

- There was.

Your mother and I are starting

to worry about you, son.

There's a history

of schizophrenia in our family.

Who has schizophrenia?

Well, you caught me

in a lie there.

No, There's no schizophrenia

in our family.

Why Would you make that up?

I'm just trying to make a point.

You're acting like

a paranoid schizophrenic.

And I want it to stop!

You get your sh*t together.

I said,

"pass out into the breeze "

I'm too hot yeah,

I cannot sleep

But if You're passing by,

I have no shame

We know We're alive,

Can't feel no pain

The water rose up

inside my fear

My hidden things

took a leave

And then I saw

into the light

I Can't remember

what it looked like

Hey.

What's wrong with the bed

in your room?

Um...

I was kind of uncomfortable

up there,

so I thought I'd sleep down here

where it's comfortable.

Mm.

I think I'm just...

I'm just stressing myself out

with this job search, you know?

Well, you have to learn

how to handle that.

Stress management

is Avery important component

in success in business.

- It really is.

- Yeah.

Ow.

What the hell?

What happened to your arm?

I don't know.

Your mother must have scratched

me in her sleep.

Although I think I got one

on my scrotum, too.

She wasn't anywhere near it.

I don't know who

or what you are,

but I'm really, really sorry

that you were disturbed.

So what I'm gonna do is I'm

gonna give you a proper burial.

And in return,

I Would really appreciate it

if you Would just cross over

to the other side

and leave me

and my family alone.

This is a really bad time

for a haunting.

Longstreet ranch...

Well, I tried.

Aah!

Aah! What the...

F***?!

Thanks for coming.

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