Surfer, Dude Page #3

A handful.

Well, then why don't you just

stroll on down the hill

and smile and be charming

and be cool

and be Addington, you know?

Maybe something cool will happen.

Man, like I said, I got no problem

shaking a surfer's hand,

brother, but I'm not living there.

Cool?

Okay, dude, but remember:

mind open, heart enlarged,

soul receptive.

- I love you.

- You too, brother.

All:
Please. Please.

You're killing me, man.

- Let's go.

- Boom!

Ho ho ho!

# You see me? #

- Whoa!

- I love America.

I had no idea.

Yes!

Excuse me?

You put the green pepper,

red pepper, garlic, onion,

y mucho amor... you need

the loving in your life, papi, right?

Anybody know where Eddie is?

Oye, mamao, can't you

see I'm cooking?

What's up, La Rosa, bro?

Man, I saw you talking trash

on TV the other day.

What gives?

"What gives"?

I'll tell you what gives.

You and your free-surfing-country-soul

vibe, that's what gives.

It's about 30 years late, papi.

That sh*t can't compete.

I'm not competing, bro.

Well, I'm not buying it, bro.

I ain't selling it.

Oh, whoa whoa.

I need all cameras in the kitchen.

You got nothing I need.

Hey.

I thought about

what you said

and we're just not

gonna work out.

- Ooh.

- What?

I'm with Lupe now.

I'm sorry.

I'm just looking for Eddie, man.

You can go home

and cry now, Steven.

- Hey, dude.

- Aw, man.

- It's good to see you again, Steven.

- Likewise.

It really is.

We're excited to have you...

the coolest surfer in the world.

Yeah.

- Hard work, fella!

- That's right, fella!

Come on.

Grass is perfect

and we cut it, man.

Why?

You used to walk everywhere

yourself, huh?

- You stopped, man. Why'd you stop?

- Oh, no.

Was it that reef bounce

at Mavs, man?

Oh, you heard about that.

Saw that.

It was heavy, man.

Steven, Ben and Barry asked me

to personally take care of you.

Not that they had to,

'cause numbers don't lie.

- Numbers?

- Numbers, Steven.

It's all about the, numbers.

And yours, my friend, add up.

- Margaret?

- Yep?

Just need your signature on these

saying you'll participate fully

in my projects.

Dude, we were just chilling,

surfer to surfer.

There are times in life

when years of preparation

meet the moment

of opportunity.

This is that moment for you.

Checks.

This is actually stoked, bro.

What up, bro?

Those are for me, aren't they?

They're for you, yes,

as soon as you sign,

saying you'll participate

in Free Surfer

and live in my house.

I told you, man,

I'm not signing.

I'm not participating, you know?

It's not personal, Eddie.

I'm trying to tell you, I'm...

I surf.

All right, I'm a surfer...

out there.

Steven, I want you

to remember something here,

and don't forget this, huh?

You're in advertising.

Ben and Barry

never paid you to surf.

Jack's got my number.

You tell him to call

when you start "feeling it."

Heeeeey.

Wait a minute.

What about that?

What about that?

I was acting.

They told me to play

like I wanted him.

But I want you there.

You do?

What do you want?

That's good there.

Truly epic night, brothers.

I just want to go on record...

Report said "surf."

That's a lake.

Oh, bro.

Something's off, dudes.

No bueno, mate. No bueno.

Msica, msica. Come on,

party, people.

Follow me.

Lupe's so cool. Aww!

Back to the sofrito, mi gente,

because I did not forget about you.

Man:
We got 20 cameras outside.

We can cut to anything we want.

We edit as we go.

There's hardly any post.

It's sexy, it's happening,

it's fast. We got...

I mean, we can...

if anything gets old,

like... like this. Hello?

Come on, I don't want shots

of girls talking.

Is this better?

Good.

That sh*t goes across

demographics, huh?

And next week, Addington drops in.

Boom... it's fantastic.

What the f***?

Hey, man, look... Socrates

recommended the dialectic

when faced with

such an impasse, man.

You know?

You ask me a question,

I respond with

something to build on

and a conversation is formed,

out of which answers are revealed.

Mm-hmm.

Where are the waves?

I don't know, man.

Something's bogus, dudes.

B-O-G-U-S.

I gotta compensate.

"No entiendo," dude.

No no no, he speaks

of reciprocity, bros...

balance in the energy

that binds us, man.

There are no separate deeds, man.

You know, read Heisenberg, man.

You know, we affect... by looking

at that tree, you affect that tree, man.

You make it real, man.

Yeah yeah, thanks.

You've been really helpful.

Sacrifices, bro.

Measure for measure.

I gotta take action.

Whoa whoa whoa,

what kind of action?

No more women

till we get waves.

Yeah, good one.

No more weed, either,

not till we get waves.

Hey, you know, let's not

take it too far, man.

First off, f*** that.

And second off, yeah, f*** that.

There's philosophy and then there,

you know, there's life, man...

Why don't you just blow

my f***ing balls off?

- and physics, man.

Butterfly effect, man.

Mate, you're the ass-cutting

chosen one.

Hey, stone crab...

you love stone crab, huh?

You could stop eating

stone crab.

- Right.

- Give it up.

No, bros.

I'm fasting.

- I got nothing.

- I got nothing.

Ah, we gotta vacate.

Indo, Gold Coast...

wherever it's going off...

I'm taking us.

- That means we're gonna surf?

- That means we're gonna surf.

- Did Jack Mayweather call?

- No, sir.

Okay,

tell Perez to prep

the Addington tape.

Yes, sir.

And tell him to cancel

his plans for the evening.

Yes, sir.

And put a hold on

his expense accounts.

Whose?

- Addington's.

- Oh, yes, of course. Sorry.

Um, which ones?

All of them.

Went to Surf Liquor.

Fucknut must have frozen

your tab there too.

Really upset Baker.

That tab was the one

pure thing in my life.

Herb will get you through

times with no money

better than money will get you

through times with no herb.

I tried. I looked. I called. I met.

No one can touch you with Zarno

owning your contracts.

I need waves, Jack.

Waves.

Hey, what about

that sticker thing?

You know?

The logo idea.

Oh, that's kinda...

personal, isn't it?

Exactly. Great.

Man, he loves you.

It's just... it's probably

just a communication problem.

Tell him that you will

push the product. That's money to him.

I mean, it's all we got.

I don't know what else to do.

Hey!

- Mmm.

- Hey.

- "Under the sun."

- Yeah.

Everything is under it, right?

The surf, chicks,

good loving, good times...

anything you're into,

happening "au naturale"

- under...

...the sun.

- The sun!

- The sun!

Yeah.

And it's something that Addington

has been so mad passionate about

for, like, ever.

Stickers.

You can put it on anything.

- You know, your television...

- Surfboard.

- Your wall.

- Your laptop.

Your dog.

If you shave it.

Okay. Okay, all right.

Look... wow.

Well, I've listened,

I've considered,

and the answer's no.

Not feelin' it.

Now are you ready

to come to work or what?

- Dude...

- Excuse me.

...be cool.

What's it gonna be?

Fun under my sun

or F*** City?

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