Swept Away Page #2

Synopsis: Amber is 40, beautiful, rich, spoiled, and arrogant beyond measure. Nothing makes this woman happy, including her wealthy but passive husband (Tony), a pharmaceutical kingpin. When Tony takes her on a private cruise from Greece to Italy, Amber is unimpressed at this impromptu no-frills vacation, and takes out her anger on the ship's first mate, Giuseppe. When a storm leaves the two shipwrecked on a deserted island, however, the tables suddenly turn...
Genre: Comedy, Romance
Director(s): Guy Ritchie
Production: Screen Gems
  8 wins & 8 nominations.
 
IMDB:
3.6
Metacritic:
18
Rotten Tomatoes:
5%
R
Year:
2002
89 min
$553,102
Website
612 Views


can you empty the ashtrays?

- Thank you.

- So go on. Chemicals. Advantages.

Where would we be without

fertilizers and pesticides?

Ask Peppe. He was a fisherman

until pollution put an end to that.

- Pollution is so terrible.

- God. This isn't a sad story, is it?

- Ask him what he thinks.

- Nothing wrong with chemicals.

- What do you think about pesticides?

- Whatever.

- Let him get on with his job.

- Come on. You gotta have an opinion.

If it's man-made, I don't trust it.

You can't cut corners with nature.

Chemicals has made life easier,

but easier doesn't mean better.

Money corrupts principles. You can't

see clearly when money is involved.

Not money and principles.

Now, this is interesting. Go on.

Chemicals has made

a few people very rich.

But as they say, no such thing

as a free lunch. Pay now or pay later.

When you pay later, you don't know

the interest charged...

...and who's gonna pay it.

- Very good.

- Yes, very good.

Thank you, nature boy. Now,

could you please empty the ashtray?

- Lf it weren't so hot, I'd go swimming.

- You wouldn't. The water would be too cold.

- I can't eat this.

- What's wrong with it?

Nature boy!

You! Pee Pee!

- Yes, madam?

- This fish is bad. It's off.

Bad?

In that case, if you don't want to

eat it, you probably want to wear it!

Now it doesn't look so bad, madam.

- You blinded me!

- Now you can bake the cakes.

- Anthony! Help me!

- Sit down, rich boy...

...or you'll need all the drugs you got

to ease the pain I have for you.

- Shut up! Tell it to the fishes.

- Help me!

Now Peppe is in charge.

You listening to me, nature boy?

- Yes.

- Why are you serving bad fish?

She needs a doctor!

A checkup from the neck up!

- Shut up and take this.

- Don't tell me to shut up.

You made it bad.

You take it up!

- What did you say?

- You take it up!

No. The other bit. The bad bit.

- What did she say? In English.

- She said the fishes is bad.

Bad?

- Tastes okay.

- Of course.

Never mind. Cook another one.

- Why?

- Because they're rich...

...and all rich people are the same. They

play little games. I see it all the time.

Don't react. They get bored,

and they change the game.

Our job is to smile... Like idiots.

The chef is sorry the fishes wasn't

so good. He's cooking new fishes.

Are we being punished

because we're rich?

No, madam. I love money.

If you weren't rich,

you wouldn't be here.

No punishment here.

We love you.

And we love your money more.

That's it, Greek idiot.

Smile.

Happy birthday, Mrs. Marina.

You look gorgeous.

- It's always good to see you.

- The pleasure is all mine.

- Professor, welcome back.

- I'm not a professor.

Of course you are.

Did you have a good time?

- Let me help you.

- Thank you.

- Are those ruins old?

- Yes.

All right. I've got it.

- Did you have a nice day?

- Yes, I did. Thank you.

I bought some fresh fish.

- Peppe always catches the fishes for us.

- I don't care about Giuseppe's fish!

What she said? What's the f***ing b*tch

complaining about now?

Did one of your crew members

just swear in front of me?

No, no. You mean "fuking"?

This is the Italian name of the fishes.

He doesn't think it's very good.

- "Fuking" is a fish?

- Yes.

I don't care if it's fuking, puking

or a f***ing kung fu king!

I want that fish,

and I want it tonight.

- Okay, madam.

- Thank you.

F***ing, puking, f***ing good cooking

I want her on my table tonight...

Shut up, idiot.

I can't cook that.

These fishes are beneath me.

This is fishes?

Where did you get?...

Cook Peppe's fishes instead...

...and pretend it's their fishes.

Got that?

- Now, that's what I call fish.

- Yes.

- Here's to the fishes.

- Hear, hear.

It's really good.

Isn't it, Michael?

Yes, it is. It's delicious.

- It's just right. Great job.

- Thank you.

It tastes just like chicken.

We can do without nature boy's fish from

now on. I'll be in charge of fish buying.

That's okay, madam.

- That's disgusting.

- Really?

I think it's beautiful.

Why are you haunting our corridors

with Ms. Beautiful?

The crew still wants my fishes.

I'm taking it to the kitchen.

- I hope I haven't hurt your feelings.

- Feelings?

- Let us leave my feelings out of this.

- Don't be so touchy.

- Can't we just get along?

- No, madam. We cannot.

I see you have your dancing shoes on.

One, two. One, two, three.

Please, madam.

What's the matter?

Don't you wanna dance with me?

I don't wanna dance with people

I don't like.

Wine.

- Grapefruit juice, madam.

- Thank you.

Do you have children, Pee Pee...

...or just the mind of a child?

- What?

- That cartoon you're wearing.

You requested us to change

our T-shirts.

You T-shirt offends me. It's revolting.

Change it.

- Subtle.

- Shut up, you old drunk.

Going to bed?

- I'll be there in a minute.

- Good night.

- Aren't you playing?

- Imelda cleaned me out.

I'm coming with you.

We can tuck up together.

- Good night.

- Good night.

- Good night.

- Like he said.

- What are they up to now?

- The husbands went to bed...

...while the wives stay up

playing cards and drinking.

What kind of husbands are they?

They got everything

the wrong way around.

Look what the brunette left

in the bathroom. I think it's cocaine.

Let me show you how to take it.

Hold on, captain.

I bet it's something the professor

made in his lab.

- Flies you to the moon in minutes!

- I've never been to the moon.

What's wrong with you?

You're the captain.

How will we make it to Italy

if you go to the moon?

Go to bed! I'll forget

you lost control. Go!

F*** you. We could have gone

to the moon and had an orgy.

I don't want to have an orgy with you.

Go to bed, idiot.

You've lost your mind

at the thought of taking it.

Rack 'em up, ladies.

I'm out.

I'm going up for air.

Where is everybody?

They went to the caves with the dinghy.

- Why didn't they tell me?

- I know why.

Guido. Lower the other one.

I wanna go to the caves.

- It's too late.

- I'll be the judge of that.

There is a current,

and the weather could changes.

So what?

The caves are not so close.

My advice is to don't go.

Really? My advice to you

is to get the f***ing dinghy down.

It's all the same to me,

but it's getting late...

...and it's a long journey.

- We'll manage.

I have warned you.

- What's the matter? Are you scared?

- Scared?

I was conceived on the crest of a wave

and born in a boat.

What is the meaning of "scared"?

Is this another one of your jokes?

Let's start the engine, shall we?

- This engine is a little touchy.

- I can show you touchy.

Now, start the engine.

Number one:
My name is Peppe.

Not Guido or Pee Pee!

Number two:
I can't start an engine

that doesn't want to be started.

Can we stick to one language?

I'll take the engine that runs your mouth.

Then we wouldn't have any problems.

- Do we have enough gas?

- Yes.

We have...

...gas.

- We'll just wait, then.

I'm sure they won't be long.

- Aren't we going too far out?

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Swept Away" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 8 Jul 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/swept_away_19235>.

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