Taekwondo Page #4

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because since you like

girls and guys,

if you meet a guy,

it doesn't matter,

you can be with him and then go

satisfy your needs with a chick.

It's no big deal.

It's easy to repress.

So you just leave him there

and that's it.

He's going to be the first

to get married,

-whether he's gay or not.

- Yeah, maybe.

And we're going to be there

celebrating it with presents,

dancing at his wedding.

It's true.

You know I love Romi...

but I can't say no to girls

who call me for sex.

The other day, Romi had to

get some paperwork done.

She went to sleep at her house

because it was closer

to where she had to go the next day.

It's like she's a witch.

I don't know if this girl

is psychic or what...

Natalia texted me.

Remember Natalia, the skinny girl?

Remember? The skinny girl?

You wouldn't believe

what she looks like now.

She's got a lot more meat

on her bones and a great rack.

Man! I took a cab

and went to her house

and we f***ed for nine hours.

Of course.

What was I supposed to do?

It's natural.

Then I got home

and took a shower...

and I felt like sh*t.

I felt really guilty.

It sucks.

The important thing

is that Romi doesn't catch you,

because then

you'll want to kill yourself.

Hey, I think Germn is kind of gay.

You'd know if he was for sure.

It takes one to know one.

Stop it, man. Hey...

You keep calling me "cocksucker"

all day long.

"Cocksucker, cocksucker,

cocksucker."

You don't realize it,

but it gets annoying.

I'm sick of it.

Plus, I have a girlfriend.

You don't realize

I'm just kidding around.

Hey, stop! I was here first!

Diego, I'm gonna use your shampoo;

it's great!

Okay.

Fer, I'm going to take a shower here,

because Lucho's using the shower

downstairs and he takes an hour.

Alright!

What are you reading?

"Hunger..."

It's Norwegian.

I'm going in now.

Are you gonna take much longer?

No, come in if you want.

Son of a b*tch!

I'm gonna kick your ass!

Come on, man!

We were In tenth or eleventh grade

and we were really stoned.

It was one of the first times

we all smoked together.

We were in...

Fatso's grandma's house...

in the yard. At one point

I went to his grandma's room.

She had died recently...

And I saw Leo there...

and Fer, making out

in the room.

We were just kids

and we were stoned.

Besides, we had to experiment

a little, right?

No, but I don't think

we were making out, man.

No, I totally remember.

We were making out.

It was my bisexual phase.

Now I'm totally gay.

No, wait a minute.

I really don't remember that.

I think we must've been

so stoned that we imagined it,

but that's all, man.

Well, everyone should be able

to do whatever they want.

It's like Juan says,

the more gay guys there are,

the more girls there are for us.

The other day,

Fatso and I were at Serrano

and he was totally freaking out.

"This place is full of gay people!

Cocksuckers!"

and Juan said "Take it easy, Fatso.

The more gay guys there are,

the more chicks there are for us

to choose from."

That's how it is.

Last time we were...

I don't get people who think

that if you go to a gay bar

all the guys are going

to hit on you.

It's not true.

Gays play hard-to-get

more than girls.

I swear it's true.

The other day Flor and I

went to a party

full of gay Peronists...

You know she's an activist there?

And I looked like the gayest guy in

there, with the shirt I was wearing.

I'm serious.

No one gave me the time of day.

They don't even look at you.

That's how it is.

Wait...

Okay, but where are you guys now?

Yeah, obviously, man.

Yeah. But stay there

at the gas station.

I'll be there in half an hour.

Okay?

Yeah... Alright, man.

Alright!

Maxi...

Maxi, come with me

to pick Fatso up.

He's with Juan.

The girls left him there.

They went to another party.

Maxi...

What? Did they have sex?

Fatso said he did.

He screwed her in a bathroom.

But Juan didn't. He just

made out with her in the yard.

Come on, man. Let's go.

- I'm exhausted, man.

- Come on! Don't be inconsiderate!

Stop bothering me, man.

- Come on, man! Come on!

- Alright!

Let's go.

Listen, now you guys

go out and play soccer

and let Andrea clean up, please.

Okay, but Fede's lying down

because he doesn't feel well.

But he won't get in the way.

In any case, she can just

not clean that room.

Of course, that's no problem.

Who? The boy with the blue eyes?

Germn, a friend of mine

from Taekwondo.

He came to our house several

times. You've seen him, right?

Yeah, but I didn't know

he was everyone else's friend too.

No, he's my friend.

But I told him to come along.

Because he was going to go to

the South with a couple of friends

and they started dating.

They told him

they wanted to go alone,

so he had nowhere to go

on vacation.

Text me when you finish, okay?

I left you your pay

for last week and today.

Okay.

- Are you alright, Andrea?

- Yeah, everything's fine.

- You got my number, right?

- Yeah.

Okay.

You can send me a missed call

if you want, so...

I'll call you later.

I have two kids, you know?

I'm separated,

but I've got two kids.

I can be a good dad

if you give me a chance.

What are their names?

Lucas and Manuel.

- Six and four.

- Nice names.

Out!

Out!

Damn it!

F***!

- Juan...

- What?

Roll another one.

But there's only enough

for one more.

Ger...

Didn't you have a friend

who's staying near here

who had weed?

Yeah.

He's near here...

Twenty minutes away.

Tell him to bring some

and we'll buy some from him.

No, he'll bring me some.

It's no problem.

He has a bunch of plants.

He's really cool.

And he's totally out of his mind.

Hey, guys...

Let's go buy meat early tomorrow,

because the other day we got there

late and there was none left.

Hey, Fer! Do you want to go?

- Yeah, alright.

- Okay.

Hey, Lucho fell asleep.

Let's take some pictures of him

and post them for the group.

What kind of group?

A whatsapp group?

Yeah. We always take pictures

of Lucho.

Hey... Fer...

I'm serious.

I'm going to wake you up early

tomorrow.

Don't stay up too late.

Well, do whatever you want.

But I'm waking you up early

tomorrow.

Okay, you can come jump on me

if I don't wake up.

Okay, bye-

Bye.

They're always playing pranks

on Lucho, huh?

Yeah.

But he's the worst of them all.

One summer,

Juan got pictures of him

taking a dump in Fatso's bag.

He didn't care.

Fede got his cell phone

and started taking pictures.

And one year later,

Fede found the pics

and he wanted to kill him.

They always pull pranks

like that, though.

Sometimes they cross the line.

Did you put some clothes

in the wash today too?

Yeah.

I don't have any

clean underwear left.

It doesn't matter.

I'll just go to bed like this.

I saw you reading "Demian."

You read a lot.

I do quite a lot

of reading myself,

but I think you beat me.

No, only when I'm on vacation.

During the year...

I don't have time

to read anything.

It's really hard.

You know what I started doing?

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