Tales from the Golden Age Page #6

---

I've got to be home by 10.

You smoke?

Afraid your dad will smell it?

How did you guess?

I've got to go.

You can come with me if you want.

Can I?

You got the nerve?

Depends. What do I have to do?

You'll see.

OK.

You free tomorrow?

I've got school in the morning.

School...

- After school, then!

- OK.

- Bye.

- Bye.

What are you doing with that book?

Book?

The biology book

under your desk.

I wanted some more paper.

You haven't even started yet.

He has no inspiration, Miss.

Quiet!

Give me that book

so you're not distracted.

Yes?

Good afternoon.

Sorry to interrupt. Crina's father

from the factory sent me...

And?

The boiler in their block blew

and flooded the apartment.

She has to go home

and unlock the door.

We're in the middle of a test.

I've finished.

Alright.

You can go, then.

Is that your car?

It's the first one

I found unlocked.

Any particular block?

Don't say a word.

Just watch.

- Right?

- Yes.

Wait there, on the stairs.

Be quiet, Tarzan!

Good afternoon.

I'm from

the Ministry of Chemistry.

Yes?

I need to know

if your tap water's fine, Madam?

I mean, does it taste alright?

Citizens have complained about

the water, so we're doing a study.

Yes, it's cloudy.

Can we take a sample

from your apartment,

to test it?

Come after two o'clock

when my husband's home.

I have to give the samples

to the Ministry by two o'clock.

I don't know...

My husband did lodge a complaint,

but I know nothing about it.

It's very simple, you just have to

give me a bottle of tap water.

A bottle of tap water?

Yes.

From the kitchen or the bathroom?

Either will do.

It's dirtier in the kitchen.

From the kitchen, then.

OK. One moment please.

- Is a liter enough?

- A liter is perfect.

All this nonsense

just for a lousy bottle?

Listen...

What's your father do?

What's his job?

He's a technician.

What does he earn?

A bit more than a couple of grand.

Let's say he earns 2400 lei, OK?

Divided by 26 days...

That works out at...

If I want, I can earn 20 an hour.

And I don't have a boss,

I don't stand around all day.

I work as much as I want...

But you can't afford to buy a car.

A car? Take it slowly.

You can buy a video player.

- No, you can't.

- Sure you can.

Is that how you bought yours?

A guy bought a scooter

just selling bottles.

I don't believe it.

I'm telling you!

Shall we go in?

How long will it take

to make 300 lei?

Depends how hard you work.

- If you collect 100 bottles a day...

- Impossible.

- Why not?

- Not enough hours in the day.

I'd like to give it a go.

You'd like to give it a go.

Good afternoon!

Ministry of Chemistry.

We're testing the tap water.

Go to the 9th floor,

talk to the administrator.

The 9th floor.

We spoke to him, he said

your tap water has sand in.

It looks like coffee!

The Ministry doesn't believe it.

Could you give us a sample?

Let them come and see

for themselves.

We'll sort it out quicker

if you give us some.

- A jar's OK?

- A bottle's better.

Come and take one yourself

so I don't make a mistake.

- Is this one OK?

- Excellent.

Would you like some jam?

No, thank you.

It's rose jam.

Thanks,

but I'm allergic to flowers.

Look at that!

You should see the laundry!

The sheets come out of the wash

with rust on.

- It's the same in the bathroom?

- It is!

Give us a bathroom sample too.

- In the same bottle?

- No, another one.

Let me look for one...

Why shouldn't we go in?

There could be someone else

in the house.

The husband, the son,

anybody...

You're afraid?

No, but a bottle

isn't worth the risk.

It's not for the bottle.

You know what I'm talking about.

Listen, I have an idea.

Ministry of Chemistry,

about pollution from the factory.

Have you any ID?

Yes, sure.

I left it in the car.

I'll go and get it.

No, here it is!

What's it about?

The quality of the air.

It stinks awfully.

Indeed, we've received

a complaint and...

A complaint?

I've lodged three myself!

We've received several...

May we take some samples

from your apartment?

Why? You don't believe me?

We do, but...

a chemical analysis of the air

is required...

And what should I do?

We'll take some air samples.

It'll take 2 minutes.

Come in, then.

Where does it smell worst?

The whole house stinks

but the living room's the worst.

Please!

Yes, you can smell it.

You have a cat?

A tomcat, but it's not his smell.

I know his smell,

this is from the plant.

I can smell ammonia.

Listen, I hang my socks out

to dry on the balcony

and in the morning

they're yellow.

You know what we need to do?

I'll take a sample

from the living room.

Please do!

Do you have a jar?

You mean a sterile jar?

Any jar will do

Coming right up.

Will this do'?

No, it smells of mustard.

We need a glass one.

A glass one?

Can you choose one?

Look up there!

- It's 75 cl.

- It's perfect.

But it still smells.

It had pickles in it.

It's fine, that won't alter it.

- And a lid!

- A lid.

It does smell in here.

The entire house stinks!

Please, take it!

Sorry...

I'll take a sample.

Please!

And from the living room too.

Please do!

Do you have

another bottle or jar'?

- What about these?

- They're perfect.

They're clean.

My wife washed them to sell.

In the bathroom?

No point,

there's no window in there.

In the bedroom, then.

The smell goes up.

Of course,

air is light and rises!

OK.

That's it?

We're finished.

Thank you.

It's great you're doing this.

I hope you don't mind me asking...

How come you don't get

the samples mixed up?

- How come?

- Yes.

Well...

Why do you think we asked you

for a jar for the kitchen,

a beer bottle for the bedroom,

and a ketchup jar

for the hall?

And what do you do

in three-room apartments?

We ask for champagne bottles.

They can afford to drink champagne.

Well done, kids.

You've thought of everything.

We're in a hurry.

Goodbye, then.

My ID, please.

Listen, do you think

we can make 300 lei by tonight?

I'll give you 300.

I don't want you to.

You can't earn that by tonight.

You bet?

- How much?

- 50 lei.

Deal!

- Anymore?

- These here.

I'm not taking this one.

- Why not?

- It's not clean.

They were all washed!

Don't argue! I don't have to take

You have to take them all.

I'll take as many as I can pay for,

alright?

Together or separate?

- Together.

- Separate.

I'll give it to you together

and you sort it out.

Don't come again

with so many bottles!

Thank you!

What if he remembers me?

It's not good.

The lower your profile, the better.

How often do you think

somebody comes with 100 bottles?

- Here

- Forget it.

No, I lost.

How long would this take

to buy a car?

Years.

How many bottles?

For a Dacia?

Not a Dacia, say a Lastun.

You'd need 5 or 6000 bottles

for a Lastun, maybe more...

If you collect 500 bottles a month,

you can buy it in a year.

You can't.

For example, today, two people,

three blocks, 200 lei.

- We need to be more efficient.

- Yeah, we rob a bank.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes