The Adventures of Pluto Nash Page #6

Is this the refund window?

Pluto Nash! My goodness, it's marvelous

to see you! How have you been?

I'll tell you about it. This is Dina.

- I loved your show.

- Tony loves you for loving his show.

I want you to meet my wives,

Gina and Filomena.

A pleasure to meet you, Pluto and Dina.

My man, Anthony Frankowski!

- It's Francis, not Frankowski.

- Your wives don't know you're Polish?

- Nobody knows. You'll blow my cover.

- All right, it's our little secret.

You want to stay for dinner?

We made osso buco and pork and gnocchi,

all Tony's mother's recipes.

No, thanks, we ate already.

- You're a freak.

- You have no idea.

Can I talk to you in private?

Absolutely.

Would you excuse us for a minute?

Sure!

You married twins?

They're not twins. I met a perfect woman

and I had her cloned.

- Which one is which?

- Who cares?

Me and your boss, Rex Crater,

we had a little misunderstanding.

What kind of misunderstanding?

He tried to have me killed

and blew up my club.

- How do you know it was Crater?

- I know.

He offered to buy my club

and I wouldn't sell it, so they blew it up.

Sh*t.

You got to help me get to Crater.

I'm fond of breathing, you dig?

Just tell me how to get to him.

I've never met him! He watches

my show from up in his penthouse.

He sends down messages:

"Your jokes suck.

Sing 'Feelings' for me."

You wouldn't be singing

if it wasn't for me, right?

Come on, man.

I might know a way for you

to get up into his penthouse.

- After that you're on your own, Pluto.

- Thanks.

Pick up Bruno and pay the damages

on that slot machine.

Rent a car and wait outside

the front of the hotel.

I might have to make a fast getaway.

- What if you don't get away?

- I always get away.

Come on, we'll go this way.

Rex Crater's private penthouse elevator

is right next to mine.

There's a way for you

to get from my elevator into his.

How you doing?

Trust me, you'll love this.

All right, here we go.

I'll stop this so nobody bothers us.

- I gotta get that later.

- Sh*t!

That's Rex's elevator down there. See?

It only stops at the subbasement

and his penthouse.

My elevator only goes as low as this floor.

How do I get from one elevator

to the other one?

That's what Tony is here to help you with.

I'll tell you the whole thing.

Back up as far as you can go,

get a good running start, jump out across.

- Jump across to what?

- The ledge! See that ledge down there?

Grab onto these wires

and swing down onto the ledge.

- You want me to grab hot wires?

- How do you know they're hot?

It's hot!

Grab the ones that aren't hot.

Swing down, get down to the ledge.

Then you wait until

they bring Rex's late supper up to him.

When the elevator goes by,

before it passes you, you jump on top.

Use this casino chip to unscrew

the trapdoor on top of the elevator.

Jump down inside.

Take out the two robot guards.

You're alone in the elevator,

you've got a meeting with Rex.

What's plan B?

This is Plan B.

I'm here to accept Mr. Crater's offer.

- Is that right?

- It's all settled. $10 million.

- We'll get back to you on that.

- I've got to get ready for my next show.

Get them out of here.

Sorry, your robot remains property

of this casino...

...until the damages are taken care of.

I'm here to pay you.

Repairs hasn't sent down a bill yet.

You would be a real peach

if you could get me that bill.

Harry, I got a Bruno '63 Deluxe.

Wrecked a slot machine.

Owner wants to pick him up.

How much do they owe?

I haven't even looked

at the damn thing yet.

Have him check with us

tomorrow morning.

What are they saying?

You'll be spending the night.

It's been fun.

Excuse me.

- I've got to take a leak.

- Robots don't take leaks.

You're absolutely right.

Come on.

We need to get a car.

Why are you in such a hurry?

You wanted to talk to Mr. Crater?

Here you are.

I finally get to meet the great Rex Crater?

Or is it Mike Marucci?

Yeah, Mike Marucci.

Thought you were so smart,

I figured you out.

I should come over there

and put my foot in your fat grease-ball ass.

So you got it all figured out, huh?

It is a pleasure to meet me.

I'm pretty feisty, huh?

What's this, a rented tuxedo?

You know, you're old enough

to own your own tuxedo.

Sit down! You know,

you should be honored.

Only person besides yourself

to ever come up here is Belcher.

What's going on here?

Remember when they cut your appendix

out eight years ago in prison?

Gambling had just been outlawed

on Earth, so my old boss...

...Mike Marucci, commissioned

Dr. Runa Pedanken to create a clone...

...of someone who knew

their way around the Moon.

For what?

He was starting a gambling operation

and needed someone to front for him.

Someone intelligent, that he could control.

A puppet.

That didn't jive with my career plan,

so I sent Marucci and Pedanken into orbit.

Then, for sentimental reasons,

or because I'm a nice guy, I let you live.

Until you got in my way.

Let's face it,

why should I keep you around?

For what? I got your good looks,

your charm and your wit.

I even got your memories.

- You got my memories?

- Yeah.

Never wondered how my people knew

to look for you in your hideout?

Or the Paradise Motel,

which is a disgusting establishment.

I'm surprised you didn't get

a rash after staying there.

Next time I'll find better accommodations.

Mr. Mogan and Mr. Kelp have arrived, sir.

Yes. By all means, send them in.

Mr. Mogan and Mr. Kelp.

I've been waiting for those two gentlemen.

- Boss?

- Quiet.

Hey, everybody!

Nash.

- What's Nash doing here?

- No, I'm Rex Crater.

No, you're Pluto Nash.

No, I beg to differ. I'm Rex Crater.

This is Pluto Nash.

Oh, my God.

Isn't it something? But enough about him.

Mr. Mogan, I want to personally thank you

for the outstanding job you've done.

Thank you, sir.

It was a pleasure and an honor.

You see, when you have the experience

me and my men have, it's quite easy...

Oh, sh*t.

Incompetent jackasses.

Get them out of here.

I'd love to let you hang around

so you can entertain me...

...but we might have a conflict of interest.

But there's something I want you to see

before I say bye-bye to you.

Look at that.

An excellent piece of real estate, but

you never took advantage of its potential.

This...

This is wrong.

That should say Rex's,

because this is Rex's.

Little America's most exclusive

new casino!

Tell me, what do you think?

Little America is not a gambling town

and Pluto's isn't a casino.

I think you're a clown and you should

take all this stupid casino sh*t out.

If you get your dumb-ass name

off the front...

...maybe you'll be in business

for more than a week.

- Sorry, it's not wood, is it?

- Yes, and it's hand-carved!

Sorry! I'm sorry!

Pick that sh*t up!

Sh*t.

Hold it, right there, robot.

Which one's Pluto?

Which one's Rex?

Belcher!

- Shoot him, Belcher!

- Shoot him, Belcher!

Damn it!

What are you waiting for? Shoot him!

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes