The Badger Game Page #3

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That's it, Liam!

Come on! Get angry!

I feel your pain.

Eight years is a long time.

I was an exterminator

for close to that

until I got laid off.

You know, roach spray is

actually kind of a funny thing.

It, uh...

contains this active ingredient.

Pyrethrin.

It's chemical derived

from chrysanthemums.

Can you believe that?

Flowers, Liam.

Flowers.

Now, Pyrethrin,

enters the cockroach's body

through the cuticle,

it's like your skin,

and it immediately disables

the cockroach's nervous system,

shutting down

its bodily functions...

...killing it entirely.

I've heard it said

it tastes like sh*t, too.

Hold him. Hold...

would you hold him?

Now, you see,

most household brands

also contain an ingredient

that induces vomiting,

when ingested

by pets and humans.

Takes about 1 minute.

Which means you have

about 20 seconds

to decide whether or not

all of this goes down!

Well, then there's nowhere

for the vomit to go

and you end up choking

to death on your own vile.

Are you with us, Liam?

Are you with us?!

Yeah?

Am I gonna take the rag out?

Yes, please?

Yes, please?

Yes, please?

Oh, God!

Oh, come on, Liam.

We have got a long night ahead of us.

Can I have something

to drink, please?

Hey.

Thank you.

Tape him back up.

Whoo! Damn, that was intense.

Whoo!

Are you f***ing crazy?!

What, I think

I scared him pretty good.

Scared him?

You almost killed him.

Well, it got the point

across, did it not?

Wha...

I'm sorry, raise your hand

if you think I got

the point got across.

You saw how he was

acting in there.

What was that

"tell my wife" bullshit?

Kip, you're supposed to communicate

with him, not torture him.

Okay.

And what would you have done

if I weren't there, huh?

At least now he knows

that if he doesn't pay us,

we'll just torture his ass.

This is why you asked

for my help.

Like it or not,

I am here to make the decisions

that you three can't make.

What the f*** does that mean?

Uh, it means that you all have

an emotional attachment

to him that I don't have.

- I will hurt him.

- Who says we have an emotional attachment?

- You're women.

- We're women?

Yeah, it's a fact.

Women make emotional decisions.

Bullshit.

Okay, maybe not rugged

strippers from Australia

or wherever the f*** it is

you're from...

"Rugged"?

I'm from England, thank you.

Whatever, same thing.

Most women do respond that way.

- Fact.

- You don't know what I'm capable of.

Terrifying.

If something would've

happened to him, Kip...

But it didn't.

Was I or was I not

an exterminator?

- You were.

- My point exactly.

F***...

Now, maybe we could do

something a little bit

more productive

with this evening

instead of just

sitting around arguing.

How about a nice round of

applause for our VIP Shelly

who f***ing came through?

If she hadn't of sacked up, this

whole thing would have gone to sh*t.

I left my tab open at the bar.

- What?

- What?

- You started a tab?

- I didn't have any cash.

Why didn't you tell me?

I would have given you cash.

I don't know, there

was a lot happening at once

and I... I got confused

and I forgot.

Oh, f***.

What are we gonna do?

I'm sorry.

Now, you are aware, of course,

that they now have

your name on file, right?

Not if we get there first.

Come on.

- You're gonna go back?

- Yes.

We just... you can't go back

to the scene of a crime.

That's rule number f***ing one.

Relax, it's not a crime scene if

no one knows there was a crime.

If we get there before

closing time and we pay cash,

- they won't run the tab.

- If they haven't run it already.

Yeah, and it's like 12:30,

so hustle up.

Shelly, come on.

Let's go.

Come on, let's go!

Alex?

What?

Are you mad at me?

Accidents happen.

- So you're mad at me.

- I didn't say that.

Well, you didn't not say it.

Are you mad at you?

A little.

Well, then it doesn't

matter if I am or not.

I'm not mad at you, Shelly.

I'm annoyed at Kip to be honest.

I just... I hope it wasn't

a bad idea getting him involved.

- You get high?

- I'm in rehab.

So, yes, to add to me

being a rugged, trashy stripper,

I am also a recovering

meth addict.

Okay, well, this is pot.

I've had pot before, thanks.

I'm abstaining from

all drugs and alcohol.

Suit yourself.

Don't you think

we should stay focused?

I mean, at least

until they get back?

I've never smoked meth before.

What's it like?

It's pretty incredible,

actually.

You feel confident,

invincible, accepted.

Hmm.

Jesus, don't exactly see that

on the posters, do you?

No.

They always make it

sound so bad.

Let me as you a question.

Was this always the,

uh, the American dream?

To come Stateside and strip?

Yes, that's every

English girl's dream.

What kind of stupid

question is that?

Sorry.

I was a choreographer

in England.

And I didn't have a work visa,

so I stripped under the table.

I'd like to see it sometime.

The stripping, not

the choreography sh*t.

Can we talk about

something else, please?

Or better yet, nothing.

Let's talk about nothing.

You want to hurt him, don't you?

What, did he, uh, knock you up,

- or something?

- Something.

You're not really

in it for the money, huh?

Let's just say

it's not my first motive.

You know, Alex, uh,

she thought she was

gonna marry the guy.

I don't see how.

Well, maybe they had a different

relationship than you two did.

I guess so.

Do you, uh...

do you think it's because of...

how you look, what you do?

I'm not... I'm not

trying to offend you.

I'm simply saying,

a woman such as yourself...

isn't exactly going to

attract Mr. Rogers.

Someone like Mr. Rogers

isn't going to exactly

attract me either.

That's fair.

Love this song.

- Wanna dance?

- No, I don't.

Come on. I love this song.

Come on.

- Hi. I left my card here.

- What's your name?

- My name?

- Yeah, I need your name to find the card.

Collins, Michelle.

Wait a second.

You were here earlier.

Hence, why she's here

to close her tab.

Polka dot dress right?

Yeah.

Things must have gone well

with your gentleman friend.

I mean, you changed

clothes and all.

Ha ha. Funny.

- Michelle Collins?

- Yes, that's me.

- On the card?

- Cash!

Why am I the only one dancing?

I don't know,

but you should really stop.

Hey, show me your moves?

Come on, show me your moves.

- I'll tip you.

- No, thank you.

Um, I'm kidding.

Oh, God.

Yeah, I don't wanna do this.

I'm gonna go outside.

- You keep dancing.

- Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Come here.

Don't leave yet.

F*** off.

Yes, oh, please. Oh!

Please, please, please, please!

Stop! Stop! Stop!

Please, stop. Oh...

F***er!

Please!

Please, stop! Stop!

Hey, please, no, no, no, no, no.

No, no, no, no, no.

Thank you, thank you,

thank you, thank you.

Oh, my God. Thank you.

Thank you so much for stopping.

You have no idea

the night I've had tonight.

I was being held by these...

these lunatics wearing masks.

And... and they tied me up to a

chair and then they tortured me.

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