The Big Kahuna Page #8

there was a Bible verse

that I learned.

And Jesus said,

"Greater love has

no man than this:

that he lays down

his life for his friend."

Are you asking,

would I be willing to die for you?

I guess so.

That's pushing things

kind of far, Phil.

I mean, what situation

could possibly come up...

that I would be called upon

to die for you?

Beats me.

I mean, what?

You're saying, "Hey, hey.

"Larry, take a flying leap

off the balcony"? No, I wouldn't.

I wouldn't ask you.

Well, even if you did,

I'd say, "Phil, my friend,

"we've enjoyed a long

and happy relationship...

"these last I-don't-know-

how-many years,

"but in answer to your request, no, f*** you,"

and then I would dismiss myself,

no hard feelings.

Right. You should.

I don't know who I love.

There's a lot

of people I like.

But love?

That's a whole

different story.

Don't worry about it.

Yeah.

Oh, he's here.

I told you.

So. What?

How'd it go?

-Okay.

-Did you find him?

Yes, I-I found him.

-And?

-And we talked.

-And?

-And nothing. We just talked.

Well, what'd you talk

about, Bob?

Bob, what did you

talk about?

We talked about Christ.

-You talked about...

-Jesus.

Did you mention, perhaps, what line of industrial

lubricants Jesus would have endorsed?

-Larry...

-What did you say to him, Bob?

We just...

discussed things.

Concerning Jesus?

-Concerning a lot of things.

-In relation to...

-Jesus.

-Jesus.

Yes, I see.

So the subject of lubricants

didn't come up, I take it.

The nature of the conversation

steered itself away from that.

The nature did?

All by itself?

Yes.

So, conversation was

Just kind of going along,

you know, on its own,

and then suddenly,

out of the blue,

and before you knew it,

you were just there talking about God...

or Jesus... excuse me.

It was just

two people talking.

I'm about to say

something to you, Bob.

It's not something I say

to a lot of people,

because I have to truly

mean it and believe it.

Because to me, it's like

telling somebody to go to hell.

That's what it means to me.

-What is it?

-It's that I don't believe you, Bob.

-You don't...

-Believe you. Yes.

I'm having a hard time

convincing myself...

that what you

Just said is true.

-It is true.

-Perhaps.

But I'm having a hard time.

Do you understand?

-Come on.

-Leave me alone!

Will you please...

I'm trying to deal with things here,

okay, so just don't interrupt me again.

-It's all right, Phil.

-See? It's all right.

Now, Bob, I'd like

to ask you a question,

and I'd like

a straight answer.

-Can you give that?

-Yes.

Who raised...

the subject of Jesus,

honestly?

-I did.

-You...

Yes.

mentioned Jesus first.

Yes.

Why?

Because it's very

important to me...

that people hear

about Jesus.

You mean, that...

that He died

for their sins?

Yes.

Okay, Bob. Let me

restate the question.

Understanding

that it was...

very important

to our being here...

that we meet with

and speak to Mr. Fuller...

concerning

the lubricant situation,

why did you instead...

choose to talk

to him about Jesus?

Because I think

it's more important.

Even though we're at a convention

where it's more customary...

to talk business.

Yes!

I understand, Larry.

I just don't see

the crime in speaking...

to, uh, another human being

as another human being.

I didn't mention work or lubricants

or anything like that...

because I didn't want him

to think I was using...

the subject of religion

to cozy up to him,

to get him to sign

some contract.

I didn't want him

to think I was insincere.

But you were insincere, Bob,

in a much greater sense.

But you were insincere, Bob,

in a much greater sense.

If we're nothing but functions here,

then why don't they just send robots?

They don't send robots, Bob,

for the simple reason,

they haven't

invented one yet.

The day comes

when they can build a robot...

to do what we do

and make it work,

then that's exactly

what they'll do,

precisely.

But until that day,

they send us.

They say, "Hey, Bob,

Larry, Phil,

"why don't you go on down to Wichita

for a couple of days?

Don't worry about your room and board.

We'll take care of that."

And for a couple

of days, Bob,

we lose

our identities...

here in Wichita,

and we become

the hands of the company,

shaking all the other

hands before us.

What you did, the reason

you were insincere,

is that you

cut off that bond.

It would be like the hand Just sort of

breaking away from the arm and saying,

"Oh, you know what? I have this thing out here

to do that has nothing to do with you."

-The apostle Paul said...

-Please don't do that.

I'm trying to have conversation. Please don't

bring Paul in. I'm trying to do something else.

I don't see how we can have

a conversation like this...

if I'm not allowed to bring up

the subject of God.

I'm talking about something

bigger than God.

-Bigger than God?

-At issue, Bob, is not your belief in God...

or your desire

to spread that belief.

At issue is what

we're here to do.

Which is what, Larry?

We're here to sell

lubricants, Bob...

industrial lubricants...

not to save souls.

We're not here to go chasing women either,

but that doesn't stop you.

How dare you throw that

back in my face?

How dare you,

you little pipsqueak?

There is nothing wrong with admiring

the scenery while you're doing business,

as long as you're

doing business!

And for your information,

son,

fifteen years,

not once have I cheated

on my wife.

If you look at a woman with lust,

it's the same as...

-No, it's not! There's a hell of a difference.

-That's not what Jesus said.

How do you know what Jesus said,

for Christ's sake? Were you there?

-No, somebody wrote it down in a book.

-Larry.

-If somebody handed it down, you believe it, sure.

-Transcriptions are true!

It could mean I'm right or you're right.

We weren't there!

-The Bible specifically says...

-Don't you quote Scripture to me, Bob.

-Do not do it!

-I go back to what the apostle Paul...

The apostle Paul was not sent

to Wichita to hawk...

Larry. Larry.

Larry!

Larry. Larry!

With or without

the account,

we'll live.

Come on.

I'm sorry.

Yes.

We'll live.

We'll live.

I believe

I just said that.

I'm suddenly very conscious

of the lateness of things.

What time do you want to get together

in the morning?

Doesn't matter.

What time?

7:
30.

Make it 8:
00.

Fine. 8:
00.

Forgive me, Bob, for...

behaving as though

I were your father,

for trying to give you

a little something of...

what I am.

It's all right.

Larry.

Good night.

There's somethin'

I wanna say to you.

And I want you to listen

very closely...

because

it's very important.

The man we just chased

from here...

We didn't chase anybody.

The man who just left

the room...

a moment ago...

is a very good friend

of mine.

Is it because I've known him

for a long time?

Well, there are a lot of people...

who I've known for quite a while.

And some of them

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote