The Big Year Page #4

And I'm gonna let it shine...

Ever get the feeling you're being followed?

- Hello, master.

- How you doing, Stu?

Still filling those weekends, I see.

Unless you and your son here

are doing a Big Year.

Oh! Kenny Bostick,

this is my friend Brad Harris.

Who's also not doing a Big Year.

That's funny how

nobody's doing a Big Year.

Yeah. With all this fallout and El Nio.

Yeah, I know, you'd think

the conditions are just set up perfect

for someone to have a real shot at

breaking my record.

- Not that record.

- Pink-footed goose!

Pink-footed goose,

other end of the boardwalk.

- What the hell's that doing here?

- Be careful!

Hey, put her down!

Hey, hey, please, let the explorers through!

- Of course.

- Let's go, ladies. Jeesh.

After you, kids.

Get those badges.

Chop, chop, chop, chop!

Step it up! Stepping lively!

Move it along!

Thank you.

She took off. Headed north.

Probably be in Iceland by Friday.

Boy, she was a beaut, too!

Hey, is that a Calliope?

Nah.

Sorry to disappoint you boys again.

Good evening. Tonight's special is quail.

I highly recommend it.

- I couldn't.

- Yeah, not tonight.

I'll have the halibut.

And a bottle of this Montrachet.

Of course.

And I will have the soup. Thank you.

Really? After being outside all day

in the wind and rain?

Kind of a light eater.

And the truth is

the prices here are

a little steeper than I'm used to.

- Brad, I invited you to dinner.

- I know, but...

No, it's my pleasure.

Look, when I'm birding,

I don't fly first class or hire guides.

It's too much like corked bats

and steroids to me.

But tonight we're celebrating.

We saw 136 species!

Brad, 136!

Here's to them.

And to the one who got away.

Pink-footed goose.

The Montrachet.

Good. And my friend would like to

see the menu again, please.

Of course.

Cool.

That shrimp scampi was calling my name,

if you must know.

- That's a little too much.

- Okay.

By the end of the meal,

I felt like I'd known Stu for years.

It was rare to meet a birder

as obsessed as I was.

And even rarer to meet one

who could pay for dinner.

I mean, I'm 36.

I'm divorced.

I have a job I hate.

I just want to do something big, you know?

Make my mark.

So what are you gonna do?

My dad doesn't get it.

He's had the same boring job for 40 years.

"That's what people do," he says.

He's right.

Most people just stay on the beaten path,

then one day,

they wake up and realize they didn't do

everything they wanted to do.

Look at me. I was so afraid to retire,

I had to do it twice

before I finally got out here.

Why'd you wait so long?

'Cause I'm an idiot.

Okay, I gotta tell you.

I'm doing a Big Year.

Wow.

I know.

I don't know

what made me blurt it out like that.

Confidence? Innocence? Alcohol?

It just never occurred to me

that Stu might be doing his own Big Year.

Don't tell anybody, okay?

I guess I just assumed he'd be honest.

I guess I just assumed

honor and decency would prevail.

I guess I just assumed we were friends.

Mum's the word.

- We won't have to eat for a week.

- I'm hurting.

Great dinner.

Good luck.

Thanks again.

Hey, it's me,

Mozart.

The fallout's over and now I'm calling

to deal with the fallout from the fallout.

Look, babe, I'm sorry.

I'm gonna make it up to you, you'll see.

I'm going to...

Where are you, anyway? It's late there.

- I hope you're okay, babe.

- Oh! Where am I?

I'm shooting hormones into my butt

so I can have your baby, Kenny.

Okay, I'm going to hit the sack here,

but I will try you in the morning,

and I'm gonna be launching a new thing

called Operation Sweep Her Off Her Feet.

So, you might want to get ready,

'cause it's gonna be pretty spectacular.

Okay? All right. Talk to you tomorrow.

Pomarine jaeger, nine o'clock!

Brad.

- Brad!

- No.

- Oh! Sorry.

- Sorry.

"Met a dapper white-haired guy

who was really seasick

"on a pelagic near Coos Bay.

"Got a peek at his list.

"Four hundred and ninety-seven species

as of May 8.

"He's definitely doing a Big Year.

"If he doesn't barf himself to death."

I still feel like a heel.

Feel like I led him on.

But I'm afraid

if he knew about my Big Year,

Bostick'd get it out of him eventually.

And why is it so important to

keep this secret from Bostick?

Less competition he thinks he has,

the more he's likely to throttle back,

not try so hard.

Not grind for the extra birds.

Maybe I could sneak past him.

Do whatever it takes

to set that record, honey.

You know how much it means to me.

I miss you, doll.

What are you doing this weekend?

I could get us a room in Saint Paul,

not far from the Sax Zim Bog.

Really! Not far from the bog.

Wow, you do know how to woo a girl.

Ah! There's my friend Jim calling me.

Uh-oh.

I love you.

- Spot something rare for me.

- You know I will.

Hey, Jim.

Yeah, listen, talks broke down.

Deal was dead by 10:00. Over.

Total acrimony. On the way out the door,

we agreed to a do-or-die session, May 14th,

here in New York in our office.

I can't. Impossible.

- I'm flying to Attu on the 14th.

- To where?

Attu, Alaska. And I can't miss the flight.

There's not another one for a week.

Stu, you're not involved, the deal dies.

Look, you gave these people their jobs.

If you don't do something,

they're gonna lose them!

And that means a hell of a lot more

than some birds on Attu.

Attu. The westernmost island

of the Aleutian chain.

So far west, it's closer to Tokyo

than to Anchorage.

There are no hotels, no phones,

no restaurants, no toilets.

Not the kind that flush, anyway.

But for birders, Attu was paradise.

Nobody could hope to win a Big Year

without going to Attu in May.

Mom's Taxi Service! I'm sorry I'm late.

You're gonna be a little chilly in Alaska.

I'm not going.

Stop packing. I'm serious! Mom!

Are you upset because

you think you can't win,

- or because he lied to you?

- Both. And what about Bostick?

Who?

Kenny Bostick, the best birder in the world.

I think he might be doing another Big Year.

What chance do I have?

Oh, Brad, you have 486 birds.

You're on a record pace.

You can't quit now!

- Mom, my credit card is maxed out.

- No. No. No. No.

Even if I go to Alaska,

there's no way I can complete the year!

This has a $6,000 limit.

Bring me back some Alaska pictures.

- No, Mom, I can't.

- No, no, no, no.

Get dressed. Your plane leaves in an hour.

Don't piss off your travel agent.

I had no idea this car could go this fast.

If you miss this plane,

there's not another one for a week.

So, we gotta do it.

Mom, Mom, Mom!

- Welcome back, Mr. Preissler!

- Thank you.

Thanks for being here, Stu.

I can give you four hours, that's it.

Then I've got to catch my flight to Alaska.

- No problem.

- How was your trip?

- Louisiana was spectacular.

- Lot of birds in the bayou.

And saw a loggerhead shrike

from my hotel room in Natchitoches.

Adorable!

It imitates the songs of other birds

to lure them in close.

Uh-huh.

Then it impales them on thorns,

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