The Break-Up Page #9

And those logs are imperative|to insuring that our books|are straight!

I'll tell you what those|logs are. Those logs are|bullshit is what they are!

You got the receipts.|Tally the goddamn|things yourself!

I do, I do!

And I don't appreciate it,|because it cuts into|my time with my family.

I could be spending that time|with my family instead of|doing your books.

I already do the taxes.|I do the billing.

I do the hiring, the firing.|I do the maintenance.

Come on, what do you do?|What is it that you do?

You do the tours!|I am the talent, Dennis!

They sign up a month|in advance to see me.

They'll wait in line|for the next bus|to see me! All right?

So don't drain me|with all this bullshit|about the goddamn tour logs!

GARY:
How big's your TV?|BOY: Oh, shut up!

How big's your TV,|'cause I wanna know if you|can see what's happening.

Oh, wow.|You beat a 12-year-old.

I don't care if you're|12 years old. You have|more time in the day to play.

I live in the real world,|my man,

(DOORBELL RINGING)|with bills|and responsibilities.

GARY:
That's right.

You can't have a handle|called Mad Dog Killer|if you complain every time...

Brooke?|Hi, Mike.

Hi.|Come on in.

Hold on, Mom. I'm coming.

Is your mom|in the room with you?

'Cause I hope she can't see|what's happening.

I hope she can't see|what's happening.

I'm gonna be just|a few more seconds.|So, just sit down and relax.

Oh, yeah, no problem.

GARY:
I'm sorry?|Yeah, why'd you do that?

You take the fun|out of beating you, because|you have an excuse to lose.

Get a life, dude.

Do you think it's possible|that your mom won't|love you anymore

if she sees how bad|you're losing in the game.

Shut up!

Okay.

All right.

GARY:
|That's great. You're gonna|stay man-to-man with me.

What happens|when I make a play?

(MIKE GROANING)|Making plays, making plays!|Making plays!

Well, you know,|that's how my people|like to handle their business.

While your guys|are out partying,|mine are running routes.

Try to make a difference.

Mike? I'm ready to go.

Oh, hey,

do you mind if we finish|the game? We got|a real nail-biter going here.

Yeah, sure. Of course. Great.

Awesome, all right?

Touchdown.|Oh, God, is that pretty.

God, is that pretty.|Yeah, I'm a gentleman.

I like to be humble.|I'm old school.|I don't like to talk a lot.

But at the same time,|am I talented?

Tell me how you felt about|what just happened there.

That's him going deep.|That's him going...

Work ethic. Work ethic.

I could play this game|forever.

Oh, I could, too.|I love it, yeah.|I love it, don't you?

I mean, it's the kind of thing|where literally

I play the game and it's like,|four hours go by.

Fate has me highly skilled|and loaded with talent.

Oh...

'Cause I think I'm|good enough to figure out|how to beat myself.

GARY:
You push yourself.

You push yourself|trying to achieve|the impossible,

because you know|that when that moment comes

that everything you've done|up to that moment|has prepared you for victory!

I can't take credit|for it, Mike.

I got to thank|these little digital guys|with the big hearts.

Does it feel good to be|a champion? Yeah.

Yeah, it feels good|to be a champion.|Good game.

Hey, Brooke,|are you ready to go now?

Oh, yeah, yeah. Sure.|MIKE: Great.

Hey, Gary, thanks a lot, man.|It was great to meet you.

Absolutely, man.

Come on, Mike. I know|a great little martini bar.

(DOOR OPENING)

(DOOR CLOSES)

LUPUS:
Yo.

Hey, man, saddle up.|It's time to rope in|some talent.

What's up? What do you got?

My place. Tonight. Poker.|Call some girls up.

Your roommate is awesome.

Mmm.

Yeah, he's something.

So, where did you go|to law school?|Oh, Northwestern.

God, Gary's hilarious.

Yeah, he's okay.

Okay? I mean,|the guy's all time.

But he's gonna take|Chicago tourism|by air, land and sea.

And he asked me to join|his new bowling team.

I mean, how cool is that?

Mmm-hmm.

You know what?|I can't do this.|I'm so sorry.

Excuse me,|would you please pull over?|Can you pull over, please?

Hey, wait.

Tell Gary to call me.

GARY:
Welcome, everyone,

to the first annual|Texas Hold'em No-Limit|Strip Poker Tournament.

(GIRLS WHOOPING)

Now, per the e-mail|that Lupus sent, we each have|eight articles of clothing.

Now, if you want to bet,|you take off an article|of clothing,

you put it in the center.

If you win,|you take back the clothes,|you put back on what you bet.

The extras that|other people bet|will stay in front of you,

much the same as chips would.

You can go all in|at any point,

but as I outlined,|you must take off|all your clothes to do so.

The game shall last an hour,|maybe two,

at which point we will begin|the dance portion|of the evening.

(ALL CHEERING)

GARY:
Let's get going here.

I need to see the blinds.|Small blind. Big blind.

The blinds are one and one.

LUPUS:
Come on, ladies.|GARY: All right.

Oh, yeah.|Let's get going here.

Shuffle up and deal.|All right.

I mean, just because|they were playing|video games,

that doesn't mean|it didn't bother him, right?

Honestly, Brooke,|I wish I could tell you,|but I wasn't there.

All right, Sally,|get the soap|out of your mouth.

We're gonna save that|for when you're 12.

Mike was really,|really good-Iooking.

I mean,|he's a little bit of a goof,|but Gary doesn't know that.

I mean, for all he knows,|a sophisticated,

really good-Iooking guy|took me out on a date tonight.

I could be in bed|with this guy right now|for all he knows.

You know?

I'm telling you,|if you saw the look|on his face,

Mike got to him.

(CRAZY LITTLE THING|CALLED LOVE PLAYING ON STEREO)

(PHONE RINGING)

Hello.

Hey, it's Riggleman.|Great news.

(GARY SNIFFING)

So, how does this work?

I'll bring the car|around front|and you wrap them up to go?

Oh, no, no.|We take care of everything.

We deliver it. We hang it.|We check the light|and the sun exposure.

Oh. Perfect.|Yeah.

Listen, I don't want to be|too forward,

but would you like to have|some dinner with me sometime?

I'm sorry. I have a boyfriend.

Of course.|So...

Well, he's a lucky man.|BROOKE: Oh, thank you.

I guess I will just have|to keep it to home deliveries|and gallery purchases.

Thank you, though. See you.

Have a good day, Brooke.|You, too.

(DOOR OPENING)

(DOOR CLOSING)

Okay, are you|out of your mind?

Gary's throwing Greek orgies|in your living room

and you're telling|hot rich guys|you have a boyfriend?

Are you nuts?|Hey, look.|I'm not exactly innocent here.

Brooke, as an outsider|with some perspective,|I really think you...

Christopher, stop. Stop it.|I don't want to hear it.

This has already gotten|way out of hand.

I know what I have|to do now, all right?|I know what I have to do.

(COMMENTATOR CHATTERING)

(DOOR OPENING)

(DOOR SHUTTING)

Hi.

Hi.

Did you get my note?|Yeah.

Two weeks.

Yep.

I brought some boxes|from work,

so, you know,|if you need any|just help yourself.

Great. Thanks.

Oh.

Listen, a while ago|I got these tickets

for the Old 97's tonight,|and I completely forgot|about it, so I...

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