The Browning Version Page #6

Yes, sir. It's

only secondhand.

You shouldn't spend your

pocket money in that way.

That's all right.

It wasn't very much.

The price isn't still inside,

is it?

No.

Only what you wrote.

Nothing else.

What's the matter, sir?

Have I put the

accents wrong?

No.

The perispwmenon is

perfectly correct.

Oh...

Forgive me...

Taplow, I've...

I've been under rather a strain.

Yes, sir.

I understand.

Well...

...good-bye, sir.

And the best of luck.

That's tea!

Ladies and gentleman,

the umpire has called tea,

which will be taken

in the large dining marquee

near the entrance to the chapel.

Mr. Crocker-Harris.

Uh, excuse me, sir.

Do you remember us, sir?

Now, don't tell me,

don't tell me.

Wait a moment.

Trimmer, and you're Newton.

Yes, sir.

We just saw you there, sir,

thought we'd say hello, sir.

And what have you two

been up to?

I'm in

banking, sir.

Actually, I'm the managing

director of National Western.

Are you, indeed?

And I'm in the Army, sir.

Communications.

Communications, eh?

But not in classical Greek,

I fancy.

Well, actually, sir,

Newton's the youngest

brigadier

in the British Army.

Indeed? Congratulations.

Stand easy, Brigadier.

Oh.

Well, it's very nice

to see you both.

Yes, sir.

I see Fletcher got

his hundred, sir.

Oh, well,

it's only to be expected.

He's a superb player.

And-And quite, uh,

quite beautiful

to watch, isn't he?

Yes.

Well, continued

success to you.

- And to you, sir.

- Good luck, sir.

Sorry you're leaving.

God help me, I'm still

terrified of the old bugger.

Me, too.

Wonderful inning.

Special, Dave.

- Thank you, sir.

- Splendid.

Excuse me.

So, there I was in

my hotel corridor,

absolutely naked,

and no key.

I wish I'd been there.

Andrew, have a seat.

Oh, thank you.

- Thank you.

- Hello, Andrew.

You're looking pleased

with yourself.

What have you been up to?

That's a lot to ask, Laura.

Well, I'm looking pleased

with reason.

I think I've just

been given a present.

Oh, by whom?

- Taplow.

- Taplow?

That's fantastic. Hey.

So, what was the present?

Well, it's, uh, a translation

of The Agamemnon,

by, uh, by Robert Browning.

- Great.

- Let me see.

Oh, he's inscribed it.

What does it mean?

Darling...

what does it say?

Uh, it's, uh,

it's all Greek to me.

Mr. Gilbert,

can you enlighten us,

please?

Uh, how marvelous.

It's a hexameter.

Yes, but what does it mean?

Well, I'm not familiar

with th-the Browning version,

but, uh, roughly, uh,

it translates as:

"God from afar

looks graciously

upon a gentle master."

Oh, how sweet!

And very apt.

Can't imagine a boy

giving me a present.

Nor me.

A very wonderful thing to do,

don't you think?

- Yes.

- Yes, very much, so, yeah.

And he, he bought it

with his own pocket money.

What was the

inscription again?

"God from afar

looks graciously

upon a kind master."

Well, perhaps

not "kind master,"

but...

"gentle master."

Yes, I agree, uh,

with Mr. Gilbert.

I think "gentle"

is a better translation.

Uh, all right.

Uh, it's a lovely gift.

I would rather have

this present

than anything else

I could think of.

Cunning little brat.

Why cunning, Laura?

Andrew, you don't

have any wine.

Can I give you

some champagne?

Why cunning, Laura?

Because...

...yesterday, I saw Taplow

doing an impersonation of you

for Frank.

Well, obviously he was afraid

that I would tell you,

and that you would

put him on Cromwell's,

or stop his switch

to Frank's form,

or some other Hitlerian torture.

The book is clearly

an insurance policy...

a sweetener.

A bribe.

I see.

Laura, go and tell

him it was a lie.

Certainly not.

It wasn't a lie.

Then I'll tell him.

I wouldn't do

that if I were you.

He'll only hate you

for your sympathy.

Andrew doesn't need sympathy.

That's his strength.

Andrew?

I want to make something

clear about Taplow.

He has a genuine affection

for you.

Andrew, please believe me.

Well, I think you should

treasure that book.

I'd rather like to be left alone

at the moment, thank you.

You may find

that it'll...

have a special meaning to you.

Oh, yes, it will mean something.

It will remind me

of my own foolishness.

You don't deserve this.

I mean...

You've been

treated badly, sir.

By the school, you mean?

Not just by the school.

Never, never presume to know

the secrets of a marriage.

Take my advice... sir.

Make a new start for yourself.

You could

still find someone

who will care

for you, who'll...

who'll be loyal,

and who won't...

who'll... be faithful.

Ah.

Hmm.

We...

We were incompatible

from the moment we met.

Although... neither of us

realized that at the time.

Of course, Laura was, uh...

was only 22 years of age.

We both required love,

but of different kinds.

Worlds apart.

Worlds apart.

So, it's not really

very tragic...

or abnormal.

Just the problem of

a dissatisfied wife

and an inadequate husband.

Often, I believe,

a subject for Faust.

Is there anything I can do

to help you?

I'd like to help... you.

Yes. Don't take sides.

It's so very unbecoming.

Hey!

Did you see that, Andrew?

112 nut out, Fletcher,

and seven for 23.

Send out the schools.

Skittle them out.

Let me do that.

You left Taplow's present

behind.

I put it

in your study.

Thank you.

It wasn't a very good

impersonation.

I'm...

I'm sorry.

Laura.

We, uh...

we inhabit different

worlds, you and I.

We always have.

We always will.

What are you saying?

I'm saying "No."

I'm saying, "Enough."

Better not keep the headmaster

waiting.

Do you still expect me

to come to your Prize Giving?

I, uh...

I don't think either of us

has the right any longer

to expect anything

of the other.

Right.

Well, I'll leave

first thing tomorrow

morning then.

As you wish.

And does your new school

provide spending accommodation

for staff?

We haven't found anything

that we like yet.

I've read somewhere

the two worst things in life

are moving house and divorce.

So, Laura, if I

were you, I...

Oh, hello, darling.

Well, I finished my rounds.

Do you know, I often think

being a headmaster's

like being a head waiter,

except head waiters

have to learn how to speak

at least five languages.

This isn't the best moment, sir,

but we're not staying

the night, so, um...

if ever you need

any financial advice,

uh, assistance in deed...

anything of that sort,

please telephone.

I'd like to help.

Think of it as, um...

well, as repayment.

Well, thank you very much.

This is extremely civil

of you.

Whoa.

- See you.

- Okay.

- I'll see you.

- Good night.

Shut it.

You'll get me in trouble.

What's going on?

It's all right.

- You all right, man?

- Yeah, yeah.

You little f***ing bastards.

Yes!

Hello?

Anybody there?

Oh, Foster.

Sorry to disturb you, sir.

I've come to pick up

Mrs. Crocker-Harris.

Oh, yes, yes. She's upstairs.

Laura,

Mr. Foster's here.

I'm coming!

Glorious day.

Indeed, sir. Glorious.

Sorry to hear about your...

mother-in-law, sir.

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