The Court Jester Page #5

man found in my chambers.

Ah, be he king or peasant,

my ready blade will find its mark!

I'll... I'll..

I..I live for a sigh, I die for a

laugh, I lust for a laugh, ha ha!

Please! - What?

Or our lives aren't

worth that!

What? Eh, eh? Eh?

Are you alone, my dear?

I thought I heard voices.

Yes, I'm quite alone, father.

The king!

Listen, my child. I've just

met Griswold's emissary,

and the marriage is approved.

You know very well, father,

that when I marry,

I marry only for love.

Heh, heh, I knew you'd say that.

Now, Gwendolyn, do be reasonable.

Don't you realize that without

this alliance, our prestige,

our power, our position

could go like that!

Well, then let it go like that!

I wish you to marry Griswold.

And suppose I do not

wish to marry Griswold?

I don't give a fig

for your wishes!

And I don't give

a fig for yours!

No one snaps at the king!

Don't you dare snap at me!

I'll snap if I choose!

Don't snap at me!

- I will snap!

You won't! Now

understand this, my child.

This castle has walls

high and strong,

with massive gates

under lock and key.

Whilst you remain within

those walls and I am king,

you will obey my command.

Very well, father. Perhaps I have

been selfish and thoughtless.

Oh, my child. I knew I

could depend upon you.

Because you are a princess.

A true princess.

Loyal to the crown.

Sympathetic.

Sensitive. Faithful.

The key to the

secret passage!

Father, let me have it...

So, run away, would you!

Well, you trick me not.

This key will never

leave my person.

You will marry Griswold

upon the morrow,

and I promise you, daughter

or not, princess or not,

one move, one false move,

and your neck will snap like a twig!

Where is he? Giacomo

hides not behind drapes!

No no no, you must go!

I'll cut him to ribbons.

No, we'll escape tonight

after the banquet.

Very well, my sweet.

Until tonight. Very good.

Do be cautious,

sweet Giacomo!

Ha! Caution is for

popinjays and cockatoos

Begging your pardon.

Until tonight, my sweet.

But you heard what

my father said.

If caught, our necks

will snap like twigs!

Uh... like what?

- Twigs!

Twigs? Speak not of twigs

when you look at an oak!

Until tonight,

my little sapling.

If Giacomo says he will

be here within the hour,

he will be here...

eh, within the hour!

At your service, m'lord!

Your arrival, good Giacomo,

shows imagination and brilliance.

Did you expect less?

Are you now prepared to fulfill

the bargain arranged by my agent,

Sir Burton of Allenburg?

- Quite.

Very well, then.

There are two plans.

Two plans.

- Plan one.

The untimely demise of my lords

Brockhurst, Finsdale, and Pertwee.

These three

will die tonight.

Three for tonight. Proceed.

The method I leave to you.

But die they must.

Heh! They shall

drop like flies.

Precisely. Like flies.

Do you have some

sort of twitch?

Twitch? I twitch

only for action.

I live for a sigh,

I die for a kiss.

I like that very much.

- Thank you.

I lust for a laugh. Ha ha!

I never leap when I can walk,

I never flee when I can fight!

Yes, but, but...

- I... pardon?

Listen carefully! If plan one fails,

you must execute plan two.

Plan two?

Take the princess from the

castle before midnight.

By whatever means

you may devise.

For murder or abduction,

I'm your man.

You've paid the price;

name your plan.

First, plan one.

Are you sure you can dispose of my

lords Brockhurst, Finsdale, and Pertwee?

Are they married?

Yes...

Order flowers for

the widows. Get it?

Got it. - Good.

Tally ho! Ho ho!

Master, I am Back

- Well?

I have climbed the thorny vine,

and the regal maiden is mine.

Good.

Now, when I release

you from the spell,

you will fall into a deep sleep

and remember nothing.

Nothing...

Look into my eye.

Deeper, deeper.

Ah, my lords.

I understand the marriage

of the princess Gwendolyn to Sir

Griswold will be announced tonight.

My congratulations.

There is something afoot.

He is far too confident.

If this alliance

fails, we are lost.

It must not fail. Let us solemnly

pledge that we will permit nothing,

to interfere with the marriage of

Griswold to the princess Gwendolyn.

I so pledge.

- And I.

Though it cost

our very lives!

Our very lives.

Please, stop your picking and

fussing! I must breathe some air!

But madam!

All afternoon without

a moment's peace!

I just learned of your

whereabouts. What happened...

Never mind that. You must

take the child to the jester.

To the jester!

Immediately. He has the key.

But he's under

the spell of the...

Silence! Give him the child

at once! It is my command.

The jester! Where is the jester?

Summon him immediately!

Very good, sire!

Jester!

- Coming!

Come quickly, man!

The king is waiting!

Yes, uh, ha ha, have you

seen Ravenhurst about?

He's somewhere about, yes.

Well, I was supposed to see Ravenhurst

on some rather urgent business,

but I fell asleep... I don't

quite remember what I...

Ahh, Giacomo. A striking costume,

indeed. From the Italian court, I presume.

Yes, sire, Italian court. Ah, uh,

what better place to, uh...

...court Italians.

Ah, this will be

a festive evening.

Noble knights to joust at

my tournament. Come along.

And by my side a

lovely little wench,

who I'm sure will fulfill every

promise of your discerning eye.

Ah, look at her!

Charming. Charming,

Giacomo, charming.

A tribute to you,

my dear Giacomo.

Come here, my child.

Come.

Your majesty.

Was there ever more beauty?

More radiant? Rise, child.

The sweetness of your smile

outshines the elegance of your gown.

Thank you, sire.

Would you attend me?

You are most gracious, sire.

Quickly. Use the key.

Key?

Remember, plan one

Brockhurst, Finsdale, Pertwee.

Brockhurst, Finsdale, Pertwee.

Midnight. Horses

at the north gate.

Horses at the north gate...

Summon the jester!

Where are you going?

Didn't you hear the king?

Ah, beh, beh...

Cover your head!

Now get in there!

Come, come, Giacomo, let us

be gay! I would have a song.

Eh. Song.

- Has the cat your tongue?

Uh, no, I...

What do you carry

there? Why the basket?

Beh, basket?

What basket, sire?

What basket, indeed!

Come, boy, come, show me

what you have in the basket.

Wuh, I can... eh...

Yes, come on, show me what

you have in the basket.

Eh, beh basket? It-it's...

Yes, and what about that song?

S-s-song, sire? Eh beh s-song.

If your majesty doth ask it,

I will tell about the basket with a

willo willo wailey and a nonny nonny

What's that?

With a what?

Uh with a willo willo wailey and

a nonny nonny loo loo loo

I'll loo loo loo loo...

What are you

loo-loo-looing about?

Oh, I'm not loo-loo-looing,

sire, I'm willo willo wailing.

All right, all right,

willo away, willo away.

We will willo it away...

we'll willo willo willo

we will willo it away!

with a willo willo wailey,

we will sing about it gaily,

with a willo willo wailey

and a hey! nonny... no!

Come back here!

What have you there?

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