The Curse of the Jade Scorpion Page #6

Because we care about each other.

Before it was you loved me.

Now it's that you care for me?

- Just sit down.

- I'm not gonna faint.

- I've been dumped before.

I wish you wouldn't

say things like that.

You rushed me out of

that restaurant to talk...

because you were afraid I was

going to make a scene or pass out.

You are a highly volatile woman.

Am I? Most men complain

I'm cool as ice.

- You know I care about you.

- You said that. Get to the point.

- It's not that I don't want

- to leave Caroline--

- But in the end, you're not.

I've tried to work up

the courage a hundred times.

All those promises? Those stories

about how miserable you were at home?

- You're making this into a nightmare.

- Isn't it? It is for me.

- Try to understand.

- We can still be friends.

- Oh!

- We can even continue to sleep together.

- Are you nuts?

I only got involved in this

because you told me your

marriage was on its last legs.

When you say it like that,

it sounds like I've deceived you.

- Haven't you?

- I didn't mean to.

I respect you too much.

Oh, my God. How did we go from love

to you care for me to you respect me?

Next thing you'll be

buying me a prayer shawl.

- Betty Ann--

- Leave me alone, okay? Please.

- Betty--

- Just go-- I'll be fine. Leave me alone.

- Honey, listen--

- Leave me alone!

I hope you decide

to stay on at North Coast.

You're really helping

to turn our company around.

I guess we won't be having

that honeymoon in Positano, huh?

I feel like such a jerk!

You shouldn't. It's my fault. I got

into this against my better judgment.

- Honey--

- Just go.

[Door Opens, Closes ]

[Exhales ]

Good- bye, Chris.

Good- bye, New York.

Miss Fitzgerald!

God! What are you doing?

- What are you doing here?

- What do you mean, what am I doing here?

- What are you doing here?

- I happened to be passing through.

- You what?

- I'm-- What do you-- I was-- I'm--

- I'm hiding behind your screen.

- Behind what?

You have this nice Japanese screen.

I was hiding behind it.

How did you get in?

How long have you been here?

I-- What time-- I've been here

quite a while, actually.

- You broke into my apartment?

- I didn't break in.

- How did you get in?

- You really want to know?

- How did you get in here?

- I made a duplicate of your key.

- You what?

- Which you can have for no extra charge.

It's good to have two keys, 'cause

an emergency happens once in a while.

- Why did you do this to me?

- What? Why?

Because I'm convinced

somebody up at North Coast...

is responsible for the jewel robbery.

- Who, me?

- Well, you're a prime suspect, yes.

- Based on what?

- Based on the fact that I know

- everybody else better than you.

- You have access to all the data.

- So? So do you.

But you were so nervous the other night

when I caught you up there.

I came up, and you were

acting so strange.

You have a Rocky's matchbook.

I saw you put it in your--

Remember we had a drink at Rocky's Bar?

It didn't go too well.

So you broke into my apartment illegally

and spied on me?

I wasn't spying. What's wrong with you?

I was rummaging.

- I'm a big rummager.

- You what?

I was rummaging in the afternoon.

I saw "dinner with my sister."

All those sisters- all those dinners-

Those were with Magruder, right?

Oh, God! I'm mortified!

Stop it. If it wasn't for me being here,

they'd be scraping you up with a spoon.

That's none of your business,

you slimy little weasel.

And over a jerk like Magruder.

He's not a jerk. He's wonderful.

He's twice the man you are, you roach.

Don't you see? He gives you these

stories so he can get into your pants.

- He's not gonna leave his wife.

- You witnessed my humiliation.

The only humiliating thing

is how this guy takes advantage

of a smart woman like you.

You're not fit to discuss

Chris Magruder.

Look at this. She still loves the guy.

I can't believe it.

Get out before I call the police

and have you arrested

for breaking and entering.

I'm not letting you alone here tonight.

Are you crazy? Look at you.

I'd ask if you had any friends,

but I know the answer.

- [ Groans ]

- Give me this. Jesus. What--

What-- [ Groans ]

Great.

- Are you okay?

- [ Sniffles ]

- Hello?

- Oh.

[ Sighs ]

Jesus.

- [Liquid Pouring]

- What the hell Are you doing here?

I'm making coffee.

Oh, God!

It's all coming back to me now.

You came here last night because

you thought I stole some jewels!

This happens to be

a very confusing case.

I'll say you're confused.

Why didn't you go home to sleep?

- Are you kidding?

- And let you do something crazy?

- Like what?

Like take a swan dive out the window.

How do you know I wouldn't take

a swan dive with you here?

- Because I watched over you.

- You stayed up all night watching me?

That's exactly right. Yes.

And you snore like a grizzly bear

with a sinus condition.

I had a bad moment last night.

I'm fine now.

- You talk in your sleep.

- You probably took notes,

- you suspicious little inchworm.

- Who's Rita?

- Rita's the woman

- my ex-husband ran away with.

- Anything else?

- You certainly know how to pick men.

Check your sex.

There's not a lot to pick from.

And you mentioned my name too.

I thought you were awake.

- You said that I should rot in hell.

- I was probably awake.

I figured you were feeling better.

Now, if you'll go, I gotta

be at work in 30 minutes, and

don't gossip about what you saw.

Nobody's gonna gossip.

I couldn't care less about your

life. It means nothing to me.

I couldn't stand you when I met you,

and I can't stand you now.

I find you obnoxious and pompous--

Do me a favor.

When you see me in the office-- do me

a favor-- walk the other way, okay?

And if Magruder tells you

he's gonna leave his wife,

if I were you,

I would keep my legs crossed.

Don't choke on your breakfast

and die of as phyxiation.

You'll wind up unable to

dislodge a large piece of toast,

no matter how hard you cough.

Mr. Magruder, you sent for--

Oh. If you'll all open

your hymn books to page 90--

Sit down, C.W.

We have a situation.

Your brother looks good.

The embalmer did nice work.

I'll let the Coopersmiths

bring you up to date.

After careful search, using some of

the most up-to-minute techniques,

we found some interesting clues.

Yeah? Leading to who,

Eleanor Roosevelt?

We got a shoe print off the

parapet at the Kensington place.

So?

An eight-and-a-half

"C" Florsheim cordovan.

Only worn by 20 million Americans.

I mean, I wear an eight-and-a-half"C"

cordovan Florsheim shoe.

For the money, you cannot

get a better shoe.

We also found a couple of hairs.

One on the rug at the Kensington

place, the other one actually

inside the Dillworth safe.

They match.

Forgive me if I'm not knocked out.

Oh, we don't mean just to each other.

They match yours.

Just like the eight-and-a-half

"C"cordovans.

Hey, fellas. I know you guys

are angling for my job--

We also got a fingerprint

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