The Ex Page #2

you, me, Ollie,

chillin' in our yard

- with our cows.

- I could bake pies every day.

You know how to bake a pie?

How come you never made me a pie?

( rock music playing )

# He was tied to the bed #

# With a miracle drug

in one hand #

# In the other,

a great lost novel #

# That I understand

was returned #

# With a stamp #

# That said, "Thank you

for your interest"...#

Whoo-hoo, Ohio!

Look, Oliver!

- # While preparing his soul #

- Yes!

# For a perilous slide

into crime #

# He had decided

that he would err #

# On this side of divine #

# Being told

this is wise... #

Lot of white people

in this neighborhood.

# That there'd be payback

with interest in due time #

# So why #

# All the history now? #

Kids, welcome!

Great!

It's your parents.

They're in

our house already.

- Look at that baby!

- I'm gonna eat you!

- I'm gonna eat you up!

- Baby!

Your stuff got here

safe and sound,

not that you

had very much.

Dad, our apartment in New York

was about the size of this porch.

I love it.

Go ahead.

Whose furniture is this?

- Surprise!

- Got you a little housewarming gift.

- Oh, thank you.

- Yeah, you shouldn't have.

They threw in the bassinet

for half price.

( speaks Spanish )

Mom, what's with all

the Spanish?

This is your mother's

new crusade.

Oh, it's not a crusade,

Mr. Cynical.

Nancy Hodgekiss told me

about this family

that just moved here

from Argentina.

So I thought there must be

something I could do to help.

So I'm teaching

them English.

You know, having a job

completely changes a man, Tom.

It's not just

about the money.

It's about having

a purpose.

It's about feeling

proud of yourself.

- Dad.

- I've been employed before, Bob.

No, I'm not talking

about a cook.

I'm talking about

a real job.

- Dad, Tom was a chef.

- A chef's a cook, right?

Personally, I think being

a cook is a real job.

You want a tip on how to succeed,

you take a look at this girl here.

Did you know that your wife

was Phi Beta Kappa?

That she got 170

on the LSAT?

I know that, Bob.

If you remember,

we've been dating since college.

Me llamo el pollo...

( chirps )

Don't eat me!

I'm for grownups!

You know who I'm putting

in charge of training Tom?

- Chip Sanders.

- Oh, great.

Who's Chip Sanders?

Amelia:

Sofia never told you about Chip?

He's just this guy

I went to high school with.

Eat up, Tom. You got 20 more

chickens in there.

So what's this

Chip guy like?

I haven't seen him

for years.

We were

in cheerleading together.

Which reminds me,

When are you gonna dig out

one of your cheerleading outfits

and do a little

routine for me?

I don't know. Are you gonna

score a touchdown for me?

Oh, I will score

a touchdown.

I will.

Tom, don't.

It's just...

Oliver eats from there.

It just seems kind of weird.

I'm sorry. Maybe it's just

a little too early.

- Is that okay?

- Of course it's okay. Of course.

- It's totally fine.

- Okay.

Wish me luck, family members.

( kisses )

- Give 'em hell.

- I'll miss you guys.

( silent )

- # You've got the right #

- # We're tellin' you to remain satisfied. #

Tom, hi.

- Welcome to Sunburst.

- Thank you.

I should've told you,

suit and tie is not required.

Casual Friday

every day?

No, it's not business casual.

We tried that.

It's business appropriate.

It's about being yourself,

but in an appropriate way.

It's kind of special.

You know, I've been here

longer than anybody, 30 years.

Last year

a visionary took over.

His name-- Don Wollebin.

Bob:
Guys! Guys,

I want you to meet Tom Reilly,

Our new assistant

associate-creative.

- Both:
Hey, Tom.

- Hey, guys.

- This is Manny.

- This is Doug.

- Uh-oh. Uh-oh.

- Uh-oh. Uh-oh.

- What's that?

- What are you trying to do?

- You got something in your hand there?

- Hey, Tom, catch!

- Whoops!

- Yes!

Nice, Manny!

- Can't let my man down.

- You got to catch it, Tom.

The "yes" ball gets thrown around

the office all day long.

It's a way of showing

that we're all in sync.

- Oh.

- Don Wollebin taught us

that every company

is a multi-mind organism.

Do you know what

an organism is, Tom?

Sure.

An organism is a living thing.

Is it, Tom?

What about a person?

A person's a living thing.

Forgive me, Tom, but that's a pretty

old-fashioned way of looking at things.

See, here at Sunburst,

we treat people like people,

- not like things.

- Oh.

Don't worry about it. It took me

a while to get my mind around it as well.

Once you start thinking

about stuff in a new way,

it'll turn your whole

world upside down.

Come on.

Bob:
People just aren't eating

as much fried fish anymore.

So Don says,

"Let's shift the paradigm.

Forget fried fish.

Let's re-invent

the tartar sauce

As a hamburger spread.

Call it 'Pickle Whip'

and sell it to teenagers!"

- That's classic Wollebin.

- Bob:
No question.

Now last but not least,

I want to introduce

all of you

To our new assistant

associate-creative--

Tom Reilly.

Thank you all. I'm sure

that this experience will--

- Sit down, Tom. It's all right.

- Okay.

- Hey, Tom.

- Uh-oh.

Nice catch!

- Throw it!

- Nice!

Here we go!

Yes, throw it around!

Throw it around!

Oh, I don't want to do it, either.

Or do I?

Go long!

Come on, buddy.

You got to jump for those.

Unfortunately,

I can't.

And I haven't been

able to, Tom,

Since I was five.

It's great to meet you, though.

My name's Chip Sanders.

This is the guy you're

gonna be working under.

Hey, Chip, I'm really sorry

about what just happened.

I feel like an idiot.

Hold it right there, Tom.

We don't apologize at Sunburst.

The Japanese have a term

called moushiwake.

It's a way of saying

you're sorry

and taking responsibility.

At Sunburst, if you feel

you've fallen short,

you write a moushiwake

on one of these

little yellow pads.

Here. Here you go.

Just go ahead,

write it down.

"Chip, I'm sorry I threw

the imaginary ball"--

It's supposed

to be silent.

Tom, don't you

worry about it.

If I got depressed every time

somebody made a joke at my expense,

- I'd never get out of bed.

- I wasn't making a joke. I didn't--

Tom, you'll be working

under the best here.

- Oh, sticky.

- I'm sorry.

Chip just won Ohio

Advertiser of the Year.

- Congratulations.

- I don't do it for the awards.

He created

Senor Tomato

for the Ketchup Kaliente campaign.

Ay, caliente!

Arriba.

- I love this guy.

- Yeah, I'm pretty proud of him.

There's not a lot of Latino characters

in advertising.

He seems like

a really nice role model.

Well, it's nice to do well,

but also to do good.

But also to do good.

Ay, caliente!

- ( cooing )

- Look who's awake!

It's Mr. Stinky-winky!

It's Mr. Stinky-winky's pinkies.

You made mommy

a nice little poo, a stinky poo.

Yes, you did.

A binky drinky.

A pinky dinky.

"He backed away. His hand

holding the purple crayon shook."

You don't understand

a word I'm saying, do you?

"Johnson told the senate

subcommittee

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes