The Final Test Page #3

Whats it like out there, Cyril?

Theres nothing in it at all.

I played a bad shot.

- Good luck, Frank.

- Thanks.

The time is 12 oclock. We are now

taking light programme listeners ...

... back to the Oval for a further

report on the days play.

And here at the Oval, England

are 40 for 1 wicket.

Blast, we lost a wicket.

- What did I tell you.

- Washbrook caught bowled Lindwall - 22.

Here comes young Frank Weller.

Out to play his first test innings.

- Brilliant young Lancashire left-hander.

- Cora!

- Coming dear.

- You better hurry ducky, your beaus in.

Who knows, he mightnt last so long.

- Frank?

- Might be Frank to you ...

... but its Doctor Weller, to me.

Now heres his first ball from Lindwall.

Left outside his off-stump, and he

thrashes at it, and ...

... he was lucky not to get a touch on that one.

Ruddy young fool.

He plays forward and pops it up ...

... just short of short leg, and

Cornes almost made a catch out of that.

Its no good. I cant stand it.

You can listen, if you like and

let me know whats happening ...

... after its happened.

I prefer it that way.

You know, Fred, I dont this is such a joke.

I really believe our Cora has gone off

the deep end good and proper ...

- ... about that young chap.

- ... he bowls. Its a good length ...

- ... ball outside the off-stump.

- Poor old lass.

... and there he is. Weller off the mark.

A characteristic rolling ...

... cover drive off his back foot.

Another homer! Hot dog!

Could you tell me the right time, please.

Why certainly, maam.

My gosh, its only 5 minutes after 12.

- Thanks.

- This goes on until half past six?

Say, dont those guys out there

ever get tired standing around ...

... for seven hours solid?

Theres a lunch interval at half past one.

Oh, am I glad to hear it.

The time is just two minutes short

of half past one.

Before the next programme, heres ...

- ... a record of a Chopin prelude.

- Half past one! Gosh!

Yes yes, of course.

Got it now. Ive got it now ...

... or have I?

- Say, somethings happening.

- Lunch.

Tell me, is there a quick lunch

counter at this stadium.

Well there is a place where you can

get sandwiches, I think, ...

... but its not exactly quick.

- There is a restaurant.

- Fine.

Would you care to join me, maam?

- Well done, skip.

- Good show, Frank.

- The bowling looked good from here.

- Yes.

- Frank had a sticky time, didnt he.

- Well, hes still out there anyway.

Hell be right this afternoon.

Youll see.

Nice work, young fellow.

Youve got over your nerves now.

Yes, youll be hitting them all over

the field, this afternoon.

Yes, Frank, I will.

I forgot to ask you, Sam.

Are you taking that coaching job at Eton?

No. Ive turned it down, skipper.

I thought you liked the idea.

Well, I did in a way. Yes.

Good job, mind you. Not saying it isnt.

I like coaching youngsters, and

Id still be with cricket, but ...

... we cant always do what we

want to do, can we?

I dont see why not in this case.

Well, look at it this way, skipper.

If Reggies going to get on and perhaps ...

... go to Oxford. He might be meeting

some of these young lads from Eton ...

... and making friends with them perhaps. And

then, if hes got to say who his Dad is well ...

- You see my point, dont you

- Not entirely, Sam.

I think you forget the worlds moved

on a bit since you were Reggies age.

I dont know. Young chaps are

much the same today, Id say, skipper.

Still rather sensitive about their Dads

having the right sort of job and all that.

No. Ive bought myself a sports goods business.

Youre going to be a big business man are you?

Oh no, I cant have much to do with it.

Ive no head for business.

Never have.

No, it looks as though Im going to do

a lot of gardening for the rest of my life.

Sam, I ... Id like to meet your Reggie.

Would you really, skipper?

Well, Ill bring him up to the ...

... dressing room at lunch time tomorrow if you like.

- That would be grand.

- Hed be really thrilled to meet you.

The nights young,

and I let her slip

My crushed heart bleeding

Gosh. Just about perfect.

Just about perfect.

Lovely talk and no error.

- Oh hello, Auntie

- Hello Auntie indeed.

I thought youd got yourself run over or something.

Im awfully sorry.

I got stuck again.

In fact, I got stuck several times.

I quite forgot the time. What is it?

Seven oclock.

Oh Lord. It isnt.

You mean its over.

As if you didnt know.

Oh, I didnt honest I didnt.

What happened?

Whats the close of play, Auntie.

Quick. Dadll be back in a second.

If you think, Im going to help you

lie to your father, my boy ...

... youre very much mistaken.

Youll take your medicine from him.

Of all the disgraceful things to do.

And your Dads last match, too.

Did he ... did he bat?

Well, luckily for you, he didnt.

Whats the score, Auntie?

Whats the score?

Ive got to make sense, when he comes in.

Oh please Auntie. I really didnt

know what I was doing. I promise you.

I dont want to upset him.

You dont either, do you, Auntie?

Youre a wicked naughty boy.

England made 320 something ...

- ... for 2 wickets.

- Alright.

- Did you bring the paper in?

- No I didnt.

Oh Lord. Youll have to tell it to me then.

- Who made the runs?

- O Lord, my feet.

- Who made the runs, Auntie?

- This new chap, Weller.

- He made 120.

- Uh huh. Not out?

- No, he was out.

- How?

- Here take this.

- How was he out, Auntie?

- He was caught.

- Where?

Silly boy. How do I know where?

By that chap who stands right of ...

- ... the bowler, I think.

- Mid off.

- Was it a good catch?

- Well, he caught it.

- Anything sort of thrilling happened?

- Thrilling? In a test match?

Dont think it will rain tonight, do you Syd?

Shouldnt think so.

Winds from the north.

Drinks. Drinks.

Shall I tell him, Im ill or something?

Youll do no such thing, Reggie Palmer.

Youll have supper with your Dad and

Mr Thompson and make the best of it.

See.

- You didnt have any lunch, I suppose.

- No Auntie.

- Oh yes you did.

- But ...

You had it with me and an American gentleman.

In that restaurant across the road.

Remember?

It was tomies and salad and a very nasty trifle.

And it cost the American gentleman

- It was just about 8 and 4 pence too much.

- Yes Auntie.

Reggie.

Are you there, Reg?

O Lord, I hope I can make sense.

Hello Dad. Im sorry you didnt

get a chance to bat.

I wasnt.

How did you get back so quick?

Oh, we caught a bus alright.

You must have been lucky. When

I left there were still queues a mile long.

- Oh.

- Come and meet Syd Thompson.

- Syd, this is my Reg.

- Glad to meet you.

- Yes he looks like you, Sam.

- Oh I cant see it myself.

More like his mother, Id say.

- Enjoy the game today?

- Yes yes, very much.

- Whats this, Reg?

- Oh just something I wrote ...

... this morning before I went to the cricket.

- Whats ebrown?

- Ebon

Its nothing, just taken for ebony in poetry.

Can you now?

Well this is quite something.

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