The Finales II: Hypowar Page #3

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Devin (looking up out from the magazine): Where's my name?!

Devin rips it in pieces.

Devin (screaming): WHERE'S MY NAME?!

Devin drops the ripped pieces of paper onto the ground, and begins growling.

Devin (making a fist, walking off): I'll get my name in the f***ing magazine, even if I have to kill the f***ers.

We cut to Dave and Blake sitting on the couch watching TV. Logan walks in.

Logan:
Mind if I sit?

Dave:
Naw fam, We're just watching the new MCU movie.

Logan:
How oddly specific.

Emma Knocks on the door, Logan goes and opens it.

Emma:
Hello.

Logan:
Hello pretty.

They begin making out.

Blake:
They went pretty fast in this didn't they?

Dave:
I guess they did.

They stop making out, and they sit on the other couch.

Logan:
So, Work?

Emma:
I quit.

Logan:
Oh, Well that's fine, We're doing some interviews tommorow, so money will be coming in hot.

Dave:
Oh yeah, Logan, Me and Blake can't come tomorrow.

Logan (drinking his coffee and spitting it out): WHAT?! This coffee is cold.

Dave:
Did you hear me?

Logan:
Yeah yeah you're leaving me with the black dude, the midget, the midget with glasses, the dude who can't read, and this chick, Aight.

Dave:
So that's fine?

Logan:
Yeah yeah, I guess.

Blake:
Dave, You didn't tell me we--

Dave:
Well, Girlfriend--

Blake:
You can call me sometime else.

Dave:
Well, Chick, I've planned something.

Emma:
Ooooh, Romance!

Dave:
I've got a romantic getaway for us, since Logan and her went on earlier, that I thought we could too.

Blake:
Oh wow.

Dave:
Yeah wow.

Blake:
Well, I've got several meetings tomorrow--

Dave:
Cancel em!

Dave gets up.

Dave (whispering in her ear): They were non-refundable deposits too.

Dave walks off.

Blake:
Y'all notice how weird Dave's been acting?

Emma:
Right?! He seems a little--

Logan:
He's a f***ing weeb, Don't worry about it.

We cut to Dave walking in a lab (it is underground), He turns on the lights, and opens up a lunch box at his desk, It has several stones in it.

Dave (grabbing a hammer out of a section in the desk): Please God let this work.

As Dave is about to grab a stone, Bill walks in.

Bill:
The hell is going on in here?!

Dave:
I'm creating a protective robot.

Bill (grabbing a screw out of the wall): With stone?

Dave:
This is step one. I'm creating the arms currently.

Dave bangs a stone with a hammer.

Dave:
I'm giving it thin arms.

Bill runs up to him on a wind-made surfboard.

Dave:
You know every time you do that you take all the cold air that's left in a certain location right?

Bill:
Eh, F*** it. Anyway, How are you going to get the wire through the rock? That's gotta be hard.

Chris (in a dark corner sitting in a chair): That's what she said.

Dave:
Why are you here?

Chris:
Ignore me, I'm napping.

Bill:
Are you?

Chris:
Yes.

Bill:
Nice.

Chris:
You bet your ass it is.

Bill:
Why would I bet my ass.

Chris's snoring is now able to be heard.

Bill:
F*** he's loud! Anyway, It's gotta be difficult to do this.

Dave:
Actually it's gonna be super easy, barely an inconvenience.

Bill:
Oh really?

Dave:
We put a screw through the middle of the rock. We then put the wire through it.

Bill:
This is a really bad f***ing idea.

Dave (shrugging arms): Do you see all the technology we have now?! People f***ing love us for destroying that chick!

Bill:
I don’t get why, She was purely trying to kill us--

Dave:
UGH. We’ve been through this, We stopped her from destroying the f***ing state! And if she went through with her plan, she would’ve destroyed the country.

Bill:
Are we really sure of that?

Dave:
Yes.

Bill:
You’re making guesses based off f***ing superhero movies. This isn’t a f***ing superhero movie (Dave looks at the Camera).

Bill notices Dave is looking at the camera, but is unaware.

Bill:
What are you looking at?

Dave:
Them.

Dave waves at the camera.

Bill:
Did you take those sleeping pills last night with whiskey and Viagra?

Dave:
Let’s just say, Yes to the V, and I got to the puss--

Bill (laughing):
Jesus Christ. You have to tell me every time?

Dave:
Viagra!

Dave pulls out a purple pill.

Dave:
You want one?

Bill (sighing):
F***, Fine.

As Dave hands him the purple pill, We cut to Chase reading a math book, Eli and his friend Amy in their bare-underwear walk in.

Eli:
Oh, Chase--

Chase (seeing them): The f***?

Amy:
We were ummmm….

Amy then notices he can see her breasts, so she covers up.

Eli:
We’ll just go--

Chase (getting up): Oh no, Don’t let me ruin your time, Don’t let me get in the way of you f***ing a random hoe--

Amy:
That’s not nice!

Chase:
I’m not meaning it directly--

Eli:
We’ll just--

Chase walks out of the room.

Eli (as Amy kneels down): This is my room anyway, The hell was he doing in here?

Amy:
You said you guys share a room.

Eli:
F***.

We cut to him on the porch, Logan and Emma then walk out the door, and notice Chase.

Logan:
Chase?

Chase:
What?

Emma:
You okay?

Chase (getting up): Just another day in hell I suppose. What about you?

Logan:
We’re going to see a movie and get a pizza.

Emma:
Wanna come?

Chase:
Naaa, I’ll just make a sandwich and--

Logan:
No, I insist.

Chase:
Well, Money--

Logan:
My treat, plus you’re rolling in just as much dough as we are.

Chase (shrugging shoulders and walking with them): Well, Now that you mention it, Maybe I will.

We cut to them in the movie theater, They’re watching some weird rom-com.

Dialogue/scene in movie:

Jason (running up to Bethany): But I love you!

Beth (yelling in anger at him): YOU’RE F***ING GAY!

Jason:
Come on, Lacey!

Beth:
My name’s Bethany!

Beth slams the door in his face, he drops his beer bottle in his hand.

Jason:
F***ing whore.

He turns on some random musical with people all wearing pink attire.

Jason (drinking beer): That chick’s hot.

Lacey (pointing at the TV, popping up behind him): That’s a guy..

Jason spits his beer at the TV, and looks behind him.

Jason (getting up): You……

Lacey:
What? I told her the truth, You’re a gay womanizer.

Jason:
I’m--

Back to theater.

Chase (whispering to Logan and Emma): This movie f***ing sucks.

Emma:
Well, It’s a locally made movie, so We gotta support local film.

Logan (getting up to leave): Not if it’s this shitty.

Emma forces Logan back down. He makes his arms wet so her hands slip, and Logan goes to the bathroom.

Logan (washing his hands): F***ing local film.

Jace (looking at him): What?

Logan:
Oh, We’re watching this stupid f***ing rom-com called Express Yourself, and it’s f***ing bad.

Jace:
Oh yeah?

Logan:
Yeah, Jason is a f***ing moron, and Lacey and Bethany are just pointless sex objects with hints of dialogue in there.

Jace:
I directed and written the film.

Logan (Laughing in his face): Well, You’re doing a great f***ing job!

Jace:
I know you got powers, but I can still kick your little f***ing ass if you don’t shut the f*** up.

Logan (putting his hands up): Oh no! I don’t want to be kicked! Oh no--!

Logan then sprays him in the head with water, and runs back in the theater, He tells Emma and Chase to leave, and they reluctantly follow him out.

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