The Grand Seduction Page #5

Patience, son.

You'll get the hang of it.

He stinks.

So, I haven't been drinking.

- That's a step in the right direction.

- Mm-hmm.

Right? And I was wondering,

do you know of a postmistress

that would be interested in

sharing some crackers and cheese

and a not-so-good

bottle of red wine?

I'll keep an eye out.

Hmm!

You, sir, are in good health.

What happened there?

It was the substitute.

The substitute?

We're not allowed to say.

- We're not allowed to say.

- Okay.

- Did he ask?

- Yes!

That a boy!

Two weeks rolled by and our

plan was working perfect.

You said you were coming in 10 days.

Do you know when you're coming, then?

Are you coming at all?

Side to side?

Paul's heart was being tugged

at in all the right places.

All hands were pitching in,

doing their part.

Great...

Our days were once again

filled with purpose.

That's a pretty good scar

there on your left shoulder.

Uh-huh.

Let me guess, the substitute?

Uh-huh...

We'd all come together,

working day and night

for a common dream.

- I'm gonna go real loud.

- Okay.

- Are you ready?

- Uh-huh.

There's the solo.

Now!

Ah! So good!

But in spite of our efforts,

the doctor started to feel lonely.

I know we talk every day,

but it's not the same.

It's not the same. You're not

here, you're not beside me,

and I miss that.

- And I miss you.

- Well, tell me,

what you would you

do if you were here?

- Tell me.

- Uh, what would I do?

Yeah, tell me, what would you do?

- Tell me, naughty boy.

- Naughty boy?

Um, well...

I would start by kissing your neck.

- Oh, would you?

- Yeah, I would.

And then I would proceed

to caress your arms

and your back

and those very, very,

very long legs.

It's getting very hot in here.

- Well, maybe you should undress.

- I already am.

Nice.

I need a cigarette.

You quit.

All right, I'm not gonna

smoke it, I'll just... suck on it.

Tell me, what now, Dr. Lewis?

I would, uh...

Tell me. Tell me.

- I would, uh...

- Tell me.

I would, um...

For the love of God, tell her!

I'd play with my machine.

Mm... And then where

are you gonna put it?

- What did he say?

- What will you do with your machine?

I think he said machine.

- Tell me...

- He's going to use his machine.

- What the hell is a machine?

- And then...

I would caress, uh, your feet..

With that gassed-up machine.

Why would he do that?

Do we write all this down?

Yes! Of course we have

to write this down!

And then I'd flip it over and

clean out the undercarriage.

I think I should draw some of this.

Yeah...

And then I'd see if it

wants to run on its own.

With her feet?

That's what I heard.

He said he wanted to rub his big

machine up against her feet.

His machine? What's a machine?

Like a...

Ha! No!

Yeah, I'd do it once.

- With your feet?

- Yep!

Pfft! I'd be worried about fungus.

What? It can spread

at an alarmin' rate.

Here, look, I'll show ya.

- It's creepin' up my leg.

- Come on!

No, you can't borrow 'em.

- I'm sorry. What?

- Vera.

- Murray.

- Did you get it?

Oh, sh*t!

There wasn't room in the fridge.

You froze it?

- It's not entirely frozen.

- Get a move on!

I'm a dead man.

What age are you, Paul?

29 now.

Why?

It's just my son would be

close to your age about now.

- We lost him 10 years ago.

- Oh...

I'm sorry, I didn't know.

What was his name?

Gerald.

Gerald...

I lost my father.

- Oh, really?

- Mm-hmm.

I don't usually talk about it.

I don't know.

I don't usually talk about my son.

I guess this is the way it would feel

if he was around still, you know?

He passed away when I was two.

Hmm! Bubbles.

Eh?

Yeah.

- Bubbles. What's that mean?

- Oh, that's a big fish there!

Oh, yeah!

- No, stay calm! Stay calm!

- Oh, it's biting, Murray!

- Calm down.

- We can't lose this.

Take it easy, now.

Calm down. We got it.

- Okay, yeah, yeah. Calm down.

- Yeah!

- He's biting. What do I do? Reel?

- Reel him in.

- Yes, and pull.

- Oh my God!

Calm! Reel 'er in there!

Yeah!

Yeah, he's a fighter!

- It's huge, Murray!

- Just reel 'er in there.

Oh, yeah! Look at that!

- Here he comes!

- Get it!

There we go!

Yeah! Get it! Get him!

- Yeah!

- There ya go!

Yes!

- He's...

- Eh?

- Cold.

- Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Like almost frozen, really.

Oh, yeah, he must have

come from the very bottom.

Right down there!

Oh, that's a beauty you got.

Oh, my hands are cold!

Thank you! Really! First fish!

- You're a natural.

- There you go.

- Right behind him.

- He banged it!

Pow!

There we go!

- To the great fisherman!

- Ah!

It's been refused.

Why?

First of all, $100,000

is a lot of money.

Secondly, our forms don't have little

boxes you can check for bribes.

- It's not a bribe.

- It's a bribe.

Are you really the

manager of this bank?

Because if you really are,

you know, the position holds

many responsibilities.

You know. I mean, obviously,

there's a lot of documents to stamp.

Don't! Don't! No! Don't!

You probably have some complex

accounting you have to see to.

Stop! Don't! Murray!

Don't! Stop it, Murray! Don't!

- Stop it!

- Then I imagine you set aside

- 15 minutes preciously on the Internet...

- Stop it!

...where you take time to

polish your cricket stick.

Don't! They watch those videos!

Oh, yeah?

Don't! They watch those...

- Murray!

- There's more.

There's also a part of your job where

you have to believe in the project!

You have to be a

part of the project!

A bank manager gets

involved with the project,

he sticks his neck out,

he risks his reputation,

goes for broke, he rolls the bones!

He looks the superior straight

in the eye and he says,

"Forget the application form!

I know this project's gonna work!"

A bank manager does

all those things!

If you can't do all these things,

Henry, I'm afraid you're...

Don't say it, okay?

Just don't say it.

- Don't say it.

- If you can't do all these things, Henry,

you are nothing but an ATM.

Is there something I should sign?

Oh!

Enjoying your stay?

Yeah.

I mean, it's, uh, a bit different.

You know, I guess I'm used

to restaurants and theatres

and cellphone coverage,

to different cultures and

opportunities, you know?

- But here, it's...

- In our little village...

No, I didn't say that.

Small harbour.

It's the people.

You don't even have to ask how

they're doing, you just know.

And there's something

about that, that...

You know? Especially if

those people let you in.

- Hey, Paul.

- Hey.

So, uh... so I had these

patients this morning,

- and they had these awful-looking scars.

- Yeah.

You know who the

substitute is, Murray?

Can't say.

Please.

The butcher! They received

care from the butcher.

Since he's the butcher,

he has the most knowledge

of the human anatomy.

Apparently he read a

couple books in the '80s.

I mean, can you imagine?

I guarantee you

he doesn't even scrub down.

On the sanitary purpose,

it's... it's ridiculous!

You should see the size of

these scars he leaves behind.

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