The Heart of the Deal Page #7

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for about 7 years now.

- Oh. Making sure you really

know each other, right?

- Heh heh!

- Do you come from money?

- Um...

We were comfortable, yeah.

- Old money?

- Charlie, enough.

- You're being fired.

Taken to the cleaners.

He's a lawyer.

- He's an odd duck, hmm?

- Yeah.

- ? I realize it's just

a picture in a frame ?

- Cute.

Vodka straight.

I will miss you.

You're a very strange man.

- How did you meet Levy?

- At Yaboom in Amsterdam.

You know it?

A whorehouse, yes?

For now he's director

of this piece of sh*t.

But someday...

Ciao, baby. Must go party,

party, party.

- Hey, boss.

- George. How's it going?

[ All cheering ]

- Charlie.

Hey.

They fired me?

- Yup.

- Who told you?

- Grier.

- Because of this?

- Nope.

- I have to call Howard.

- Draper's staying.

- He sold me out?

Wait a minute. Where you going?

- Where do you want me to go?

- Uh, well, Glenn and I

are getting a flight out

tomorrow morning around 9:00.

- Yeah.

- So, I don't know.

I guess we should say goodbye.

- You want a goodbye moment?

- Well, yeah.

Yeah, I mean...

? Opera ?

[ Knocking ]

[ Knocking ]

Hi. I had an idea.

Can I come in?

This might be interesting.

Very interesting, Charlie.

I was changing money

at the airport and...

Do you mind if I turn

this sh*t off here?

The studio said to

salvage what we could

and we still have

the Prague incentive money.

You know what? It can't

leave the country.

It's got to be spent

there or it goes away.

That's $3.5, $3.7 US.

OK...

Are you ready?

We makeBill and Ben.

Lionel's script.

It's beautifully-written.

What do you think?

I mean, would it be so

awful to make a movie

we could actually be proud of?

- Where's Glenn?

- You and I could

pull this off, Charlie.

The studio's in chaos,

so we make it look like we're

wrapping outFreedom Fighter,

but we don't send home the sets.

We rebuild them and we

use them forBill and Ben.

We'll keep Hans, Levy.

Not Andrei, he'll rat us out.

We can re-work one

of the Prague sets

to use it as the

House of Commons.

Ian Chadwick would

be great as Disraeli

and Fiona could play the

wife, Lady Whositz,

and Nigel could do Gladstone.

We cast the whole thing

out of London and Prague,

L.A. will never know about it.

- You think this is lamb?

- We could make a real film.

- Why do you want to do this?

Because if it's for revenge,

that's not a very good reason.

Trust me.

- I'm not mad at Howard.

He did me a favour.

The stupidest job on

the planet:
development.

I like production, Charlie.

I like being on the frontline!

- All right, I'll read it.

- Read what?

- Lionel's script.

- You never read it?

- Ah...

Levy, could you come to my

room in about 20 minutes?

We're going to have

a little meeting.

Let's keep it on the QT.

- Yeah. Where is the QT?

- No, I mean

don't tell anybody.

Except for Linda.

Ask her to come too.

- OK.

- In 15 minutes.

- Sure.

- Keep this quiet. Fiona?

Could you come too?

- Certainly.

- Morning!

- Good morning!

- Going to the

meeting, are you?

- Meeting?

- Right, I thought you

were a friend of Bill's.

- Who?

- So you're not going

to the AA meeting?

- Oh, no!

- Neither am I.

Much too early.

Maybe see you in the bar later.

[ Knocking ]

Morning, everyone.

- Nigel, come on.

Close the drapes.

- See if we have

any extras...

- Charlie, we made a mistake.

We shouldn't do this.

They'll arrest us.

You're completely right!

I'd arrest us. Wouldn't

you if you were them?

Let's just get to Prague

and wrap the office out

and I can bury the

costs of all this.

Did you hear me?

- Mmm-hmm.

- What do you think?

- They'll only arrest

us if it loses money.

[ Speaking Czech ]

- Hello, my friend.

How are you?

- Vladimir.

- Charlie Berns.

This is Deidre Hearn.

Levy, our director.

Our DP, Hans.

- You've been to Prague before?

- No, never.

- How are ya?

- You have the blueprints?

- We're going to make the

prison, House of Commons.

- He'll have to build

it from this sketch.

- I want to be shooting

on this set within a week.

- I can shoot Fiona and Nigel.

- It's impossible.

- Skip, call

your mom and dad.

Because you're the

new line producer.

We'll be back with Ben and Queen

Victoria in a couple days.

- See you Wednesday.

- Where are you going?

- Going to London!

[ Speaking Czech ]

- Just keep at it 24-7

till it looks

like Parliament.

- Uncle Charlie?

- OK...

- Thank you.

- Group hug.

All right, we gotta go.

He got snot

all over my shirt.

He did!

- Just be quiet.

He's having a big moment.

What do we tell Ian?

- That we have Vanessa.

- But we don't have Vanessa.

- She loved the script.

- She's putting in a bathroom.

- That's code.

She wants more money.

- How much more do

you think she wants?

- One bathroom.

Wonderful country, as

long as you're a mushroom.

- When were you

thinking of shooting?

- If I had my way, right after

you finish your carrot cake.

No, I'm just kidding.

Next Wednesday in Prague.

- Wednesday?

Oh. I wasn't aware.

- Vanessa wanted to call you,

but I wasn't comfortable

giving out your number.

She's really passionate

about this project.

- She's doing it?

- She loves the script.

- I really can't.

You see, we're

renovating our kitchen.

- I completely understand.

[ Phone ringing ]

- Ah...

Hello?

Hey Glenn, how are you?

[ Gasp ]

Um, hi.

I'm actually in London.

We're making-- Glenn, can you

hold on for one second?

Because I'm getting

another call.

OK.

Hi, it's Deidre.

Hey, Melanie.

You're kidding.

We got Ian.

- Imagine my shock.

- Ha!

Well, that's just great!

Thanks, Melanie.

I can't believe it!

I can't believe it!

We're going to jail!

How do you do it,

Charlie Berns?

- How's Glenn?

- Oh my God!

- What did you do with it?

- Shh! What if I

hit the button?

- There it is.

- Hello?

Oh, hi.

I thought I lost you.

So, things have

changed a little bit here.

We're making a movie.

No, not that movie,

a different movie.

- But he's suspicious

of you, Ben.

- I was not blind to the worldly

advantages of such an alliance.

But I have already proved my

heart not to be purchased.

- You have nothing

to prove to me.

- I found you as I thought.

Amiable, tender...

[ Airplane overhead ]

...gifted with no ordinary mind.

[ Airplane overhead ]

- CUT!

[ Levy yelling ]

[ All talking ]

- Morning, Lionel.

Excuse me a moment.

This scene this afternoon,

this chap here,

Mossad, would it be?

[ Laughing ]

CIA, perhap

- I'm sorry. I'm not sure

what you're asking.

- This is a different

script, Nigel.

- Oh. Completely different?

- Completely different.

- Oh!

Makes sense, doesn't it?

An improvement, I think.

- It's part of his process.

- Chief, I've got a

developing situation here.

We've lost the Countess.

- How?

- She's taking a series.

- I need coffee for this.

- But these are two

lovely actresses

not from L.A.

London, New York.

- New York's too close to L.A.

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