The Heartbreak Kid Page #2

We go down now, we can get

a whole afternoon of sun in.

Wait just two seconds.

Just two seconds.

Just two seconds.

Give me, give me two seconds.

Listen, I'll meet you down there, okay?

- I'll meet you down in about ten minutes, okay?

- Okay.

That's my spot.

What? Excuse me?

I said, you're lying in my spot.

This is your spot?

- Everybody knows that.

- I didn't know--

I just got here.

I didn't, uh-- I'll move.

I just got here.

Never mind.

Just don't do it again.

Lenny?

Lenny!

Len?

Lenny, come on!

- Come on!

- Be right up.

What are you looking at?

No, no.

The sun's hot, honey.

I just wanna get a little tan.

You've already been out an hour.

That's a lot the first day.

I know when I've had enough.

Ooh, it's hot! It's hot.

You feel like a dip?

You know I can't swim.

You can't swim?

I didn't know that.

You did too.

How would I know that?

I've never been to the beach with you.

Well...

I guess that's another thing

you just found out about me.

Hey!

Oh! I'm so sorry.

Did I get you wet?

- No, that's okay.

- I'm really sorry.

- That's okay.

- I didn't mean to.

Who's she?

I don't know.

Is she staying here?

I don't know.

Think she's attractive?

No!

I warned you.

Didn't I warn you, Lila?

- Didn't I say, "Lila, you're getting too much sun"?

- Ow!

Didn't I say that?

I just wanted to get a nice tan.

- I'm sorry.

- Well, it's too late now.

You're gonna puff up

like a basketball.

- Ow, ow, ow.

- I mean, here it is, our honeymoon.

I thought we would go to the dog races;

I thought we would go to jai alai.

I thought we would see some

of the big shows in the big hotels.

Instead, we're gonna sit

in a hotel room.

- Oww!

- You're gonna puff up. I'm gonna watch television.

I won't puff up.

I'll put some stuff on that stops you

from puffing up.

There's no such thing as that!

They haven't invented anything like that!

You're gonna puff up!

You're not gonna be a normal person

till Wednesday or Thursday.

You could be

a little more sympathetic.

I'm going down to the bar

for a bottle of beer.

Where are you going?

I'm going down to the bar

for a bottle of beer.

- When will you be back?

- When I finish my bottle of beer!

It's our first night in Florida.

What difference what night it is?

I'm thirsty!

Turn the television on.

I'll come back after my beer.

How's it goin'?

It's Miami.

I know what you mean.

- Here you are, sir.

- Thank you.

That's my stool.

Hi.

Did he say you could sit in my stool?

I didn't know it was your stool.

Would you like it back?

I'll let you know when I do.

You a guest at this hotel?

Is that what this is?

I just got in today.

I'm Len Cantrow.

No kidding?

Can I get you a drink?

No.

Excuse me. Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Come on, Kelly.

They're waiting for us.

Reservations were 8:30.

Gonna be on the beach tomorrow?

Oh, yeah, sure.

In the morning?

Yeah, I don't even have breakfast.

I just have some juice.

I'll put on my trunks,

and I'm down there.

Just make sure

you stay off my spot.

Thanks for the nut.

Did you meet anyone at the bar?

What?

I said, did you meet anyone

at the bar?

Who would I meet at the bar?

There's just a bunch of jerks here.

- I don't know.

- You were gone so long. I thought, maybe--

like you were talking

to someone at the bar.

No, they don't even get a crowd

until midnight. I was, I was alone.

I put cream on.

It doesn't hurt so much anymore.

Maybe tomorrow I could sit in the shade

with you for a while?

No!

You stay out of the shade.

I mean, there are sun rays in the shade.

You have to stay in the room

all day tomorrow.

What'll you do?

I'll, I'll hang around the beach.

I'll look at the jerks.

There's a lot of paperbacks in the lobby.

Wait!

Where are you rushing to?

Nowhere.

I'm not rushing anywhere.

Just who would want to spend

a beautiful day like this in bed?

Want me to call room service,

order you some breakfast

or coffee or something?

I can do it myself.

Yeah, call room service,

order anything you want.

I'll keep checking with you all day long.

You know something? The best thing

I could do is leave you alone...

Because the only thing

that's gonna help you is time.

- And cream.

- Cream and time.

Lenny?

If I look better by tonight,

could we go out someplace for dinner?

Absolutely. Anything you wanna do,

we're gonna do it, okay?

Anything you want, that's what we'll do.

Just take care of yourself, and I'll, uh--

I'll check with you all day.

The important thing is that I get outta here.

I'll leave you alone.

You'll be better off.

Really.

Okay?

Oh!

Hot! It's so hot out here. You're so lucky

you have an air-conditioned room.

It's so hot out here.

Okay.

Excuse me.

I'm sorry, excuse me.

He's crazy.

He's in such a rush. He's crazy.

I didn't know they allowed Teddy bears

on the beach.

I didn't see any signs.

They're not allowed!

So just stay off the beach.

Ahh!

Whoa. You are this terrific girl!

You are this terrific--

what a terrific girl you are!

I didn't know Teddy bears could talk.

Hey, where'd you get that laugh?

My father bought it for me.

We're very rich.

Oh!

Last one to shore buys the cokes.

Hey, wait a minute.

Wait a second.

I think I should tell you.

That girl I was with yesterday?

Miss? That girl I was with

yesterday is my wife.

I'm on my honeymoon.

I just got married three days ago.

So what else is new?

What else is new?

What else is new?

Minnesota? I mean,

what do you want to live...

in a dumb place like Minnesota for?

- What's wrong with Minnesota?

I mean,

it's so far from New York.

Well, if you and your cute little wife

are ever driving through,

stop in and say hello.

Is there another name

that goes with Kelly?

Corcoran.

Kelly Corcoran.

That figures.

A girl like you is gonna have a name

like Kelly Corcoran.

What's your cute little wife's name?

Lila.

Lila?

Lila.

Does Lila come when you call her?

No. She's okay.

What's that ring for?

It holds my finger on.

I've got leprosy.

That's funny.

I like your hair down.

It gives you a Teddy bear look.

Does it bother you if I do that?

- You can do anything you like.

- Anything?

I think you're ready for my test.

Test?

You have a test?

Terrific!

Give me your arm.

Just relax.

It's my own special scratch test,

only given to certain

selective individuals.

Relax!

Relax your fingers.

Kelly! Come on, honey, it's 3:00.

Let's go, huh?

Sure, dad. I'll be there in just a minute.

Okay? Go ahead.

I promise.

Be right there.

- Well, thanks for the coke.

- Wait a minute.

- Where are you going in the middle of a beautiful day?

- We're checking out.

You're checking out today?

Daddy doesn't like this place.

He doesn't like the element you get here.

We're moving to the Jockey Club

until Saturday.

Wait a second. I've gotta see you

one more time.

- I've gotta prove something to myself.

- We're moving to the Jockey Club.

Can I see you there? Can I meet you

for a drink? I'll come over like 7:00.

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