The Heartbreak Kid Page #5

enjoy your dinner.

I am!

I really am!

What is it, Lenny?

What did you want to tell me?

Hmm?

Pardon me, sir. I'm afraid we're

a little late with the pecan pie.

Chef tells me we ran out

about ten minutes ago.

- Would you like to order something else?

- Wait a minute.

What, are you joking? No pecan pie?

- Sorry, sir.

- No pecan pie!

Lenny, what are you doing?

The main reason we came here

was for the pecan pie.

That's all right.

No, it's not. They should've said

that to us at the door.

They should've warned us that there was

a danger of running out of pecan pie.

Well, there is one small piece left

in the kitchen.

Would you want that one piece?

We also have some

excellent blueberry pie.

I mean, we drove

all the way from New York.

Listen. Take it. Take the pecan pie.

We can share it.

I don't wanna share it!

I promised my wife the pecan pie.

I want you to--

bring the pecan pie for my wife.

I promised--

just bring me some coffee.

No blueberry pie?

What do I want any blueberry pie for?

- Yes, sir.

- It's not a reject, is it?

- It's a perfectly good piece of pie, right?

- Yes, sir.

That really bugs me.

I've been talking about that pie

as far back as Virginia.

If I'd have given him ten bucks,

you'd have had pecan pie

flying outta your ears by now.

- They got it back there.

- It's all right.

Honey, I'm getting the pie,

and I'm very happy.

Lenny?

Tonight's been the best night

of our whole trip.

Hasn't it?

Aren't you happy tonight?

See, that's part of what

I wanted to talk about.

Um--

geez, it's warm in here.

You pay these kind of prices,

the air-conditioning is faulty in here.

- It's just--

- I think it's probably your sunburn.

Go on, Lenny.

What were you gonna say?

No, I was just gonna say that, uh--

um... that, uh--

when I was sitting out on the hot

courtroom steps this afternoon,

uh, I was thinking

that in three weeks...

You're gonna be 22 years old.

- The 12th.

- Right.

And the really fantastic thing

about being 22 years old...

is that you have

your whole life in front of you.

I know.

We both have.

I-- I mean, the people you could meet,

the places you could go,

the things that you could do.

- It's just--

- Lenny, I never thought that I'd get to Florida.

That's right. I mean, what some women

would not give to be 22 years old.

- It's just a--

- That's right. I know it.

To go when you want,

to do-- to live.

To live!

Do you know what I mean?

To live. Is that what you mean, Lenny?

We only pass through once, right?

I mean, we can't squander it,

no matter what happens.

We're just passing this way but one time.

We can't squander it.

Once is a lot.

Once is a whole lifetime.

That's why we have to use...

And learn from anything that happens.

We have to...

learn from the good, from the bad,

from the happiness, from the tragic.

We have to learn.

We have to use it all. To use it all.

You're so deep, Lenny.

I never knew that you were so deep.

Do you sense at all

what I'm trying to say?

Do you, uh--

oh, Christ, it's so hot in here.

Is it hot in here, or is it hot in here?

What? I--

I don't underst--

What are you trying to tell me?

Let me--

I'm trying to say...

We have to prepare ourselves.

We have to prepare ourselves

for anything, you know?

I mean, everything could be terrific.

The world could be singing.

And then suddenly--

suddenly, for no reason at all,

it's over.

It's over, Lila.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God, Lenny.

I think I know what

you're trying to tell me.

I didn't want it to happen.

I didn't plan it.

You're good. You're good.

You deserve better than me.

You deserve much better than me.

I didn't want it to happen.

- I didn't plan anything like this.

- Oh, Lenny.

Oh, Lenny! Oh, my God, Lenny!

Oh, Lenny, you're dying.

Oh, Lenny, oh, God,

why didn't you never tell me?

Oh, Lenny!

I'm not dying!

Who said anything about dying?

I want out of the marriage!

I want out

of the goddamn marriage.

- I'm gonna throw up.

- Listen to me. We're not right for each other.

We're not right for each other.

It didn't work out.

I tried to tell you as far back as Virginia,

but you couldn't see it.

You were too busy yelling

"pee-pee" every two minutes.

- Lenny, let me get to the bathroom, please.

- No, no.

- I have to throw up now.

- Listen, listen. Listen to me. Please listen to me.

- Oh, God.

- Isn't it better it happens now...

Than in ten years from now when we got

three or four kids running around?

Please pay attention! I don't want

to have to say this a second time.

- Lenny, I'm gonna do it on the table.

- Here. Drink some water.

Please. I think people

are starting to look at us.

- Oh, God, Lenny, please. Help me, Lenny.

- Okay. Okay. Here.

I don't want to do it on the table.

Just drink the water.

Okay, take it easy. Just take it easy.

Take it easy. Okay?

Give me a quarter for the ladies' room, please.

Would you please help me--

I'm gonna give you more than a quarter.

I'm gonna make a tremendous settlement.

Give me a quarter for

the ladies' room, please.

I'm gonna make a terrific settlement,

a generous settlement.

I'm gonna give you everything.

I'm gonna give you the car.

I'm gonna give you all the luggage.

I'm gonna give you

all the wedding presents.

For a marriage that's not a week old,

that's pretty good.

Some people don't get that

after 40 years.

I kept the car in tip-top shape.

That's terrific.

What is that sound?

What are these sounds? Come on.

Honey.

Oh, oh.

Honey. Lila, come on.

It's not the end of the world!

It's just a crummy annulment.

Come on!

- Come on.

- Pecan pie.

- No, no. Okay. Thank you.

- Is it all right?

- Would you like some whipped cream?

- No! It's okay.

- Shall I leave the whip--

- Leave it! Fine, fine.

Listen, honey.

It's good. It's good.

Okay. Okay. Okay.

Take it easy.

Take it easy.

Okay. Okay.

Okay. Listen now.

I would like, if possible--

if possible, if we could

settle this tonight, you know,

because, you know, check-out time

is 11:
00 tomorrow morning.

Unless you want to stay on

for a couple of days and then--

I'll work that into the settlement.

I mean, it's--

you know what? I feel that we're over

the worst of it now.

I-- I-- I actually--

I feel closer to you right now...

Than I think we've ever

felt before, you know?

Sometimes...

when two people experience

a common tragedy,

it creates a bond between people

that can last a life--

You know what I would like? I would like

that we should have dinner sometime.

You know?

And I think that then...

we could look back on all of this...

and we could see all the good

that's come out of this.

That's the way--

That's-- that's the way

I would like this to end.

Wouldn't you? Don't you think

that's a good way, to, uh, to look--

Better?

It's better?

You feel a little bit better?

You feel a little--

you okay?

- You okay?

- Yeah.

Hi.

Gonna eat the pie?

You want a little piece of pie?

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