The Invention of Lying Page #5

"and mocked by Brad and Shelley,

two huge douche bags.

"Lecture Films would go on to make

the picture, and it'd be a huge success.

"And Mark would become very wealthy

and famous from it. "

What are you gonna call this, Mark?

The Black Plague.

I want you to start immediately

'cause I think this could be

the best screen play ever written.

Oh, it will.

It will be the best screen play

ever written by anyone.

Well...

I guess congratulations

on selling your script today.

-Cheers.

-Cheers.

Tell me something about your family.

I don't know that much about you.

We're sort of what you'd call u n lucky.

My dad was an alcoholic.

Sad.

Drinking got to a point where he lost his job,

and with a family to support,

he had no choice

but to turn to a life of crime.

What kind of crime?

Burglary. Houses, mainly.

What are you doing here?

It's Monday at noon.

You're not supposed to be at home now.

If you must know,

I'm incredibly stressed at work.

I've come home early.

I'm having a bit of me time.

More importantly, what are you doing?

Well, I was gonna rob your house.

I don't like that idea. Not a fan of that at all.

Well, I'm not gonna do it now

because you're in.

And do you know what's gonna happen?

I'm gonna call the police,

you're gonna be arrested.

Well, I'm just gonna leave,

and you don't know my name.

-What is your name?

-Richard Bellison.

Good to meet you.

You've got two options. Option one,

I send the police to your house, right?

Arrest you there,

embarrass you in front of your neighbours.

Or option two, you just come in

and wait for the police here.

-No, I'll wait.

-Yeah?

-Come on in then. Do you want a cup of tea?

-Yeah, that'd be great.

He spent the last years

of his life in jail.

I never really knew him.

But I've been blessed

with some luck as well in my life.

I had a wonderful mother who raised me.

-Oh, that's sweet.

-She's great.

Where is she?

At an old people's home.

But I'm gonna get her out of there tomorrow.

I'm gonna get her a mansion,

so she can spend

the rest of her life in luxury.

That's nice.

-Compliments from the chef.

-Thank you.

I don't know what's wrong with him today,

but these just look awful.

They look fine to me.

Well, you're stupid.

I was thinking.

Now I'm obviously rich and successful and...

Maybe I'm in your league

and that we could be together, romantically.

What would be the point?

We might enjoy it.

Well, I do like you

and I do enjoy your company.

And if we were to get together and procreate,

I would like the offspring

that are carrying half my genetic code

to be well taken care of, financially stable.

I also think you'd make a good father

and a good husband, which I like.

Fantastic.

Unfortunately, none of that changes the fact

that you'd still be contributing

half the genetic code to our children.

I don't want little fat kids with snub noses.

Sure.

Sorry.

Hello? S peaking.

She what?

Mum?

They just called me. What's going on?

They said I'm probably gonna die tonight.

What?

Hello, there.

I was just coming in to check on her.

You must be Martha's son.

What do you mean, she's gonna die tonight?

It does not look very good.

She suffered a major heart attack.

Her heart is very weak.

Her pulse is not very strong.

Her blood pressure is dropping rapidly,

and she will probably suffer

a fatal heart attack sometime tonight.

Yes. Still going to die.

Side note,

it's fajita night downstairs in the cafeteria,

so you might wanna grab yourself

a little bite down there after Mom dies.

Okay?

I'm so scared, Mark.

People don't talk about it,

but death is a horrible thing.

One minute, you're alive,

and then just like that, it's all gone.

This is it, Mark.

Few more hours like this and then

an eternity of nothingness.

Nurse!

Her vitals are dropping.

I'm so... I'm so frightened.

Oh, Mum.

Mum, listen to me.

Listen carefully.

You're wrong about

what happens after you die.

It's not an eternity of nothingness.

Huh?

You go to your favourite place

in the whole world.

Yeah. And everyone you've ever loved

and who's ever loved you will be there.

And you'll be young again.

You'll run and jump

like you used to and dance.

You used to dance.

There's no pain.

Just love.

Happiness.

And everyone gets a mansion.

And it lasts for an eternity. An eternity, Mum.

Say hello to Dad for me.

Tell him I love him.

-Go on.

-What else happens?

Mum.

I'm gonna see my mother again when I die.

Will you tell us more, please?

Hi.

Hi.

Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me.

Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me.

There he is! That's him!

Is there only one place you go when you die?

Will everyone who has ever died be there?

What's this place called?

Will I get to have sex with people there?

Are there shopping malls?

What about smoking?

Can we smoke up there?

Hi.

They're saying you know something different

about what happens after you die.

Twenty four hours ago, Mark Bellison

was just your typical nobody writer.

Today, people are saying

he has new information

about what happens after you die.

Oh, this is bad.

I just need to get... I know, I'm sorry.

Pardon me. Pardon me, please.

Oopsie! Excuse me. Um, oh, excuse me.

Quick.

Come in.

Yeah.

Just tell me what you told your mom.

I don't think I should. Anything can happen.

I've got to keep my mouth shut from now on.

Why did I...

Whatever you said

obviously affected a lot of people.

I mean, I don't think you have

the choice to keep it in.

Yes, I do. I could walk out that door now.

I could get on the first plane to Namibia.

No one knows me there.

Just tell me what you said, Mark.

Please, just tell me.

My mum was dying, she was scared,

she was shaking all over,

and she said she didn't want to

just enter a world of nothingness.

So I said, "You're wrong about what happens

after you die. "

And I told her, I said,

"It's not a world of nothingness.

"You go to the best place ever,

where all your friends are

"and you have an eternity of joy. "

I made her happy.

How do you know these things?

Well, I...

Oh, that makes me happy.

You have to tell them everything you know.

You have to. It's too big.

Listen to me, you don't understand.

The things I told my mum...

Didn't you say that it made her happy

to hear them?

-Yes.

-And how did that make you feel?

-Good.

-So imagine how it would feel

to do the same for all of these people.

Uh, okay.

I need some time.

You sure I should do this?

Of course you should.

Mark, what you know

is gonna change man kind forever.

It's the most important thing

the world has ever heard.

I'll let you work.

Come in.

I brought pizza.

How come you never told me

we all get mansions?

-Uh, I didn't...

-Just let him keep working.

It's one thing that you invented

the bicycle, but...

Just keep working, don't worry about...

I've known him for a long time,

and he never told me that.

-I got plain, and I got...

-That's good.

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