The Lords of Salem Page #3

Synopsis: Heidi, a blond rock chick, DJs at a local radio station, and together with the two Hermans (Whitey and Munster) forms part of the "Big H Radio Team." A mysterious wooden box containing a vinyl record arrives for Heidi, a gift of the Lords. She assumes it's a rock band on a mission to spread their word. As Heidi and Whitey play the Lords' record, it starts to play backwards, and Heidi experiences a flashback to a past trauma. Later, Whitey plays the Lords' record, dubbing them the Lords of Salem, and to his surprise, the record plays normally and is a massive hit with his listeners. The arrival of another wooden box from the Lords presents the Big H team with free tickets, posters and records to host a gig in Salem. Soon, Heidi and her cohorts are far from the rock spectacle they're expecting. The original Lords of Salem are returning and they're out for blood.
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Director(s): Rob Zombie
Production: Anchor Bay Films
  1 win & 3 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.1
Metacritic:
57
Rotten Tomatoes:
45%
R
Year:
2012
101 min
$1,000,000
Website
935 Views


NO change, eh, Pete? Still jumpy.

That was a sucker move,

burning down your boss.

You had him all wrong.

He never crossed you.

But you're a guy who speaks first

and thinks afterwards.

In your spot,

I'll almost choose the cops,

even if it is a first-degree murder rap.

It's lucky I spotted you.

What is so lucky about being dead?

I'm gonna take care of a guy

just a little too smart. Take off the mask.

Oh, man, what the hell?

Troy. Troy.

Get over here. Get over here.

What are you doing?

You're scratching up the door.

Come on.

You're scratching up the door. Come on.

Come on, Troy. Come on.

Come on, let's go back.

Come on. How'd you get out?

Here we go.

Sister.

Feel the earth.

Taste...

...of the air

Do you hear...

...the sound of the clouds...

...and the scent of the wind...

...all becoming one?

The whores of the deceivers

are gathering round us.

You...

...are the blade

by which will bleed...

...the cunting daughters of Salem.

Dear Heidi.

Bleed us a king.

Bleed us...

...a king.

Bleed us a king.

Bleed us a king.

Bleed us a king!

It's OK.

Hi.

Why are you in here?

I don't know.

I was walking by with my dog

and I thought I would just come in

and sit for a minute.

Is that OK? Are you closed?

No.

We never close.

God is always open and ready to listen.

I just needed to sit and think.

Yes.

It is a nice place to just... come and sit.

Yeah, it's nice.

You're a very sad girl.

Yeah.

I think I should get going.

Ow! What the f***?

You have to understand

that there is a war waging in heaven.

Michael and his angels fought

against the dragon and his serpents,

but God does not spare angels

when they sin

but sends them to hell.

You are a filthy whore of Satan.

Christ can't save you.

Only I can save you.

You must no longer offer

worship and sacrifice

to the goat idols

to whom you prostitute yourself.

You must understand

what the Lord has done for you

and how he has supreme mercy

on your soul!

Miss?

I believe you fell asleep.

It's very peaceful in here.

We've been waiting for you, Heidi

Be it this day of 27 September,

1696, Margaret Morgan...

No!

...you stand guilty

to the crimes of witchcraft

and accepting the devil.

Morgan!

- Alice!

- Mm?

- Yeah, can you do something for me?

- I'm busy.

Yeah, can you play some music for me?

- I'm in the tub.

- Here, look at this. Look at this.

Look.

- Can this wait like five minutes?

- No, no.

Now, this... this book reprints

the last remaining five pages

of Jonathan Hawthorne's diary.

The witches, he refers to them

as the Lords of Salem.

Now, Heidi says

that the music that she received

came to her directly from the Lords.

That the same?

I think so.

Yeah. Exactly the same.

Isn't that odd?

No, not really.

I mean, you know, someone else

might have the same book

and copied the name and the music,

the melody and, you know...

Nothing out of this world, really.

No big deal.

Play it again.

I walk in

on butt-naked toothless granny

tooting Grandpa's clarinet

like Mrs Benny Goodman.

Sounds like your grandmother

has an appetite for the hot sauce.

She must have been

one spicy tamale.

Are you calling my grammy a whore?

She was a product of the Depression, man.

No New Deal for her.

So, look who's decided

to grace us with her presence.

Did I miss anything?

I guess we can make

our big announcement.

Fanfare, please.

The Lords are coming to Salem

for one night only

and we've got the tickets.

In fact, we've got all the tickets.

The show is free.

This is the Lords of Salem.

Satan.

Spirit of the earth.

Reveal yourselves...

to our master of the Lords.

Open wide the gates of hell

and come forth

from your blessed abyss.

Heidi?

Heidi, I'm here.

If you unlock the door, I can help you.

I was a little confused

about the message you left.

What exactly is it

that you needed from me?

Well, I'm not sure, you know.

I have a few questions

about your book here.

Ah. I thought somebody

besides dear old Mum had a copy.

Let's see.

Is this research for a new book?

Well, maybe, but I'm just trying

to track something right now.

So, what can I do you for?

Well, um, couple of days ago

I was at this radio station,

I was hawking my book,

and I heard this music

by a group called the Lords of Salem.

And I thought that this group and this music

seemed a little odd,

so I did a little research, blah, blah,

and found it in your book.

Let me guess. The diary

of the Reverend Jon Hawthorne, right?

Yeah. I was wondering if by any chance

you have the complete diary or...?

No, no, no, but I did read it in depth.

And do you remember anything of interest?

Well, basically Hawthorne was obsessed

with, in his words, "the master witch"

Margaret Morgan and her coven of six,

whom he dubbed the Lords of Salem.

Why do you think he was obsessed

with this particular coven?

Oh, he thought they were hiding out

in the woods around Salem

making the devil's music

for the purpose of possessing the souls

of the Salem women.

Yeah, well, I gathered that

from the few pages that I read,

that he and his group

eventually killed Morgan and the coven.

- Right.

- That's where the pages end.

So I was wondering if there's

any other light you could shed on this?

Well, yeah, actually, yeah.

Let's not forget

the curse of Margaret Morgan.

- What curse?

- Oh, God.

The curse section. That's the best part.

This is where the diary gets so bizarro.

The final sections of the diary just...

Well, I mean,

it's complete rambling nonsense, right?

- Let's hear it.

- OK.

Well, apparently during the execution,

while the coven and Margaret Morgan

were being roasted alive,

Margaret Morgan put a curse

on the females of Salem.

Something about the forever deaths

of the daughters' daughters

and other crazy stuff like that.

Also she called Hawthorne's bloodline

"the vessel by which the devil's child

would inherit the earth".

Whatever the f*** that meant.

Had to get out of that apartment, man.

One more second in there,

I was really gonna lose it.

Mi casa es su casa.

Watch. It's hot.

I got nothing going today.

Well, Mr Mercy...

What?

What?

You always make that sound

when something's on your mind.

No, I don't.

Come on, man. You know I'm clean

if that's what you're worrying about.

I know.

I mean, but, come on,

your behaviour at the station last night,

just, you know, kind of...

What?

- Freaky?

- Freaky. You don't know the half of it.

I know this sounds stupid,

but I really think that Lords record

is f***ing with me.

What do you mean, f***ing with you?

Every time I hear it, it's like...

Every...

Oh, man. Let me get...

Just stay calm, all right?

Hello? Yeah, yeah.

I... I need an ambulance.

My friend, she's coughing up blood

and she's got stomach pains.

Yeah, we're on the comer of Hodges,

Hodges and Derby.

Don't worry.

And I have.

Let's be sensible about this.

Who knows?

We might be useful to each other.

Forever more, our eyes will burn

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Rob Zombie

Rob Zombie is an American musician, film director, screenwriter and film producer. Zombie rose to fame as a founding member of the heavy metal band White Zombie, releasing four studio albums with the band. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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