The Man Who Would Be King Page #5

and go up in smoke.

- They do what?

- God's heart, a burning torch.

His veins run fire, not blood.

If god makes love to girl she goes:

In one flash.

Not even ashes left.

I bet a jealous goddess made that up.

They come from Sikandergul...

...with a message for son of Sikander.

They're looking at him,

if they opened their eyes.

- The message's from Kafu Selim.

- Who?

Kafu Selim, high priest of Kafiristan.

What's the message?

Kafu Selim says come.

Come?

- Is that all?

- That's all, just come.

Doesn't waste words, does he?

Tell him we appreciate the invitation.

We'll avail ourselves of it...

...one of these days.

- No. Come means "now."

What does he want to see us about?

He just says come.

I see.

All right, tell him to stand by and

the army will be ready by first light.

He says,

"No! You come alone, him and you."

Without the army?

Tell him Peachy and me don't go

anywhere without the army goes with us.

Shut up, Danny.

We have to go.

Have you gone starky?

Keep your voice down and put a smile

on your face, we've got an audience.

We'd be stone bonkers to walk into

a strange city by our lonesomes.

Either we do what they say

or pull stumps and run.

Make a beeline for the mountains

and never look back.

Run? Not bloody likely.

Run from them?

No...

...from our blokes.

We're over a barrel, Danny.

If we back away from a meeting with

old Kafu Selim, we'll lose face...

...and that is the one thing

a god cannot afford.

What to do?

Bluff it out.

Polish our buttons, stuff ramrods

up our jacksies and look bold.

Like we did when we were on charges

for drunk and resisting the guard.

- Sikandergul.

- God's holy trousers!

No weapons allowed in Holy City.

All right...

...you got us here.

Now what?

Where's your high panjandrum?

Afternoon, Your Reverence.

You wanted to see me?

Tell him he can keep it.

I'm making him a present of it.

- What did he say?

- He say, "Now we shall see."

You mortals wait down there.

Tell them to take their

paws off me double quick...

...or I'll have their guts for garters!

I'll pluck your livers...

...and feed them to the kites!

How dare you lay your hands on me,

Daniel Dravot, Esquire!

Sikander!

Now what the bleeding hell?

One minute he's about to

cut my heart out...

...next minute he's

flat on his face!

He saw that...

...and dropped like he was poleax ed!

- What do you make of it?

He says that is mark of Sikander.

They're Masons!

By the square, level, plumb rule,

compasses, the all-seeing eye!

The craft, Danny!

- That's what saved us.

- Blimey.

Only highest priest knows

about this sign...

...put in stone long ago by Sikander.

Now, Kafu Selim rejoicing

at the coming of his son.

It ain't brass, Danny.

- Sikander?

- Belonged to him, now son of Sikander's.

These here...

...make jewels in the Tower of London

look like cheap family heirlooms.

God's holy trousers!

Look at the size of that ruby!

There's a bigger one.

Why, Danny...

...we only have to fill our pockets and

walk out of here to be millionaires.

And all of it, all...

...would make us the

two richest men in England!

- The empire.

- The world.

But will they let us take it?

Take it away, I mean.

Ask him, Billy.

He says, belong to son of Sikander.

Can do with it what he likes.

Leave it here,

take away, no matter.

His will be done.

We've mules enough, and riflemen

to guard them when the time comes.

What month is it?

January, I make it...

...or maybe February.

March, April, May, June...

...four months of

winter monsoon, then...

Four long months!

What'll we do with the time?

Add up our blessings here...

...divide them by two...

...not forgetting you, Billy.

And multiply that by the

years we got left.

Tell His Reverence...

...he has my thanks for discharging

his trust so correctly...

...and delivering to me what is mine.

And tell him I'm also grateful

to all them other holy men...

...who waited for me,

from one generation to another...

...down the centuries to this

present day and fortuitous occasion.

My lord, these people

are from village of Kamdesh.

This man owns 60 cows.

All cows in the village.

- Very enterprising of him.

- Enterprise is not his, it is hers.

She's his wife. Every time

he catches her with other man...

...other man has to pay

six cows. Kafiri custom.

Use other man's wife,

pay him six cows.

He's piled up

a fortune of 60 cows...

...out of her infidelities?

- And 32 goats.

She ain't a wife.

She's a going concern!

And these are the unfaithful

husbands and these the wives?

Those four, wives of one man.

These three, wives of another.

This ain't no laughing matter!

No cattle, there ain't meat nor

hides. No milk, there ain't...

...butter or cheese and the

children's bowls go empty.

Outrageous, it is!

Now...

For encouraging his wife to comport

herself like Jezebel...

...one cow shall be paid

each of the other wives.

For using a good law for

a bad purpose, another.

For causing the young

to go without, a third.

For thinking he can

get away with it, a fourth.

He shall pay 22 cases of compensation

of four cows to each wife.

Which means, she's got...

- Fourteen and two-thirds.

...more infidelities to commit...

...to come out even.

Let's see how he likes it when she

earns cows for others. Next case.

- What's the charge?

- No charge.

This chief from Agatsi which

village have fire...

...and supply of grains go up in smoke.

He want permission...

...to raid another village for

to steal grain.

They don't have to raid and they won't

starve. Make a proclamation.

- What number is it?

- Thirty-one, my lord.

Each village will bring

one-tenth of its crop here...

...to my royal city of Sikandergul

where same will be stored.

Henceforth, any village

suffering from privation...

...shall have grain issued

in accordance with its needs.

I now pronounce this law enacted.

Selah.

I pronounce a recess in this durbar.

- Yes, my lord.

- Peachy.

If we're gonna make

it stick that I'm a god...

...you ought to bow when you pass

in front of me like everybody else.

- All right, Danny.

- Understand?

- For appearances' sake.

- Yeah.

- No offense?

- No, no, of course not, Danny.

You have to take your

hat off to Daniel Dravot.

He dealt out justice

as though he wrote the book.

Peachy was general of his armies, but

there was no more battles to fight.

Danny had him build a bridge that would

span the chasm below the Holy City.

It'd help keep Peachy occupied

until the spring came.

Look, Danny, the geese.

Skeins of them flying north.

A fortnight and the pass will open.

What we ought to do is make camp...

...high up on the mountain

and wait on the weather.

- I ain't going, Peachy.

- What?

- You heard me.

- Not going?

Correct.

Have you gone barmy?

No, I ain't been drinking neither.

I see things clear.

It's like bandages have been

removed from my eyes.

Have you ever walked

into a strange room...

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes