The Meaning of Life Page #7

Merci, Gaston.

I haven't finished.

Oh, pardon!

Gaston?

A thousand pardons,

monsieur.

Now, this afternoon, we have

monsieur's favorite, the jugged hare.

The hare is very high

and the sauce is very rich,

with truffles, anchovies,

Grand Marnier, bacon and cream.

Thank you, Gaston.

There's still more.

Allow me.

A new bucket

for monsieur.

And the cleaning woman.

Et maintenant, would

monsieur care for an aperitif,

or would he prefer

to order straightaway?

Today, we have for

appetizers, excuse me,

moules marinires, pt

de foie gras, beluga caviar,

eggs Benedictine, tarte de

poireaux, that's leek tart,

frogs' legs amandine or oeufs

de caille Richard Shepherd.

C'est a dire, little quails' eggs

on a bed of pured mushrooms.

It's very delicate,

very succulent.

I'll have the lot.

A wise choice, monsieur. And

now, how would you like it served?

All mixed up together

in a bucket?

Yeah. With the eggs on top.

But of course.

Avec des oeufs frites.

Don't skimp on the pt.

Oh, monsieur,

I assure you,

just because it is mixed up

with all the other things,

we would not dream of giving

you less than the full amount.

In fact, I will personally make

sure you have a double helping.

Something to drink,

monsieur?

Yeah, I'll have six bottles

of Chateau Latour '45,

and a double Jeroboam of champagne. '45.

Bon, and the usual

brown ales?

Yeah. No, wait a minute. I think I

could only manage six crates today.

Tsk, tsk, tsk.

I hope monsieur was not

overdoing it last night.

Shut up!

D'accord.

The new bucket

and the cleaning woman.

Is there something wrong

with the food?

No, the food

was excellent.

Perhaps you're not happy

with the service?

No, no complaints.

It's just that we have to go.

I'm having rather a heavy period.

And we have

a train to catch.

Oh! Yes, of course.

We have a train to catch

and I don't want to start

bleeding all over the seats.

Madam? Perhaps we should be going?

Very well, monsieur.

Thank you so much.

So nice to see you,

and I hope very much we

will see you again very soon.

Oh, dear. I have trodden

in monsieur's bucket.

Another bucket

for monsieur,

and perhaps a hose.

Oh, Max. Really!

Finally, monsieur,

a wafer-thin mint.

Oh, sir, it's only a tiny,

little thin one.

No, f*** off. I'm full.

Oh, sir.

It's only wafer-thin.

Look, I couldn't eat another

thing. I'm absolutely stuffed.

Bugger off.

Oh, sir, just, just one.

All right, just one.

J ust the one, monsieur.

Voila.

Bon appetit.

Thank you, monsieur,

and now, here's your check.

The Meaning of Life, part 6B.

The meaning of life.

You know, Maria,

I sometimes wonder

if we'll ever discover

the meaning of it all,

working in a place like this.

Well, I've worked in worse

places, philosophically speaking.

Really, Maria?

Yes.

I used to work

in the Academie Franaise,

but it didn't do me

any good at all.

I once worked in the library

in the Prado in Madrid,

but it didn't teach

me nothin', I recall,

and the Library of Congress you'd

have thought would hold some key,

but it didn't, and neither

did the Bodleian Library.

In the British Museum,

I hoped to find some clue.

I worked there from 9: 00 till

6:
00, read every volume through,

but it didn't teach me

nothing about life's mystery.

I just kept getting older, and

it got more difficult to see.

Till eventually, me eyes

went and me arthritis got bad.

So now,

I'm cleaning up in here.

But I can't

be really sad,

'cause you see,

I feel that life's a game.

You sometimes win or lose,

and though I may

be down right now,

at least I don't

work for Jews.

I'm so sorry.

I had no idea we had

a racist working here.

I apologize most sincerely.

I mean...

Where are you going?

No, I can explain...

As for me...

If you want to know what I

think, I'll show you something.

Come with me.

I was saying that...

Hello?

Come on.

Hello?

Hello!

This way.

Come on.

Don't be shy.

Mind the stairs,

all right?

I think this

will help explain.

Come along.

Come along.

Over here.

Come on.

Come on.

This way.

Come on.

This way.

Stay by me.

Nearly there now.

You see that?

That's where I was born.

You know, one day, my mother,

she put me on her knee

and she said to me,

"Gaston, my son,

"the world

is a beautiful place.

"You must go into it

and love everyone. "

"Try to make everyone happy

and bring peace and contentment,

"everywhere you go. "

So I became a waiter.

Well, it's not much

of a philosophy, I know.

Well, f*** you.

I can live my own life

in my own way if I want to.

F*** off.

Don't come following me.

The Meaning of Life,

part seven. Death.

This man is about to die.

In a few moments now,

he will be killed,

for Arthur Jarrett

is a convicted criminal,

who has been allowed to choose

the manner of his own execution.

There he is.

Arthur Charles Herbert

Runcie MacAdam Jarrett,

you have been convicted by

12 good persons, and true,

of the crime of first degree

making of gratuitous sexist jokes,

in a moving picture.

Ashes to ashes,

dust to dust.

It's no good.

I just can't go on.

I'm no good anymore.

I want to end it all!

Goodbye! Goodbye!

Oh, my God!

Oh, no! I...

What'll I do? I can't

live without him! I...

Mummy!

Mum, where are you?

Daddy? Mummy?

Mummy?

Yes?

Is it about the hedge?

Well, I'm awfully sorry,

but... I am the Grim Reaper.

Who?

The Grim Reaper.

Yes, I see.

I am Death.

Yes, well, the thing is,

we've got some people from

America for dinner tonight...

Who is it, darling?

It's a Mr. Death or something.

He's come about the reaping? I don't

think we need any at the moment.

Hello. Don't leave him hanging

around outside, darling. Ask him in.

I don't think

it's quite the moment.

Do come in.

Come along.

Come and have a drink.

Do. Come on.

It's one of the little men

from the village.

Do come in.

Please.

This is Howard Katzenberg

from Philadelphia.

H i.

And his wife, Debbie.

Hello, there.

And these are the Portland

Smythes, Jeremy and Fiona.

Good evening.

This is Mr. Death.

Do get Mr. Death a drink, darling. Yes.

Mr. Death is a reaper.

The Grim Reaper.

Hardly surprising

in this weather.

So you still reap around

here, do you, Mr. Death?

I am the Grim Reaper.

That's about all he says.

There's your drink, Mr. Death.

Do sit down.

We were just talking about some of

the awful problems facing the Third...

Would you prefer white? I'm

afraid we don't have any beer.

The Stilton's

awfully good.

I am not of this world.

Good Lord.

I am Death.

Well, isn't that

extraordinary?

We were just talking about

death only five minutes ago.

Yes, we were. You know, whether

death is really the end...

As my husband Howard here

feels, or whether there is,

and one so hates to use words

like soul or spirit...

What other words can one use? Exactly.

You do not understand.

No. Obviously not.

I'll tell you something,

Mr. Death... You don't...

J ust one moment. I'd like to

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes