The Naked Gun 2 and a Half: The Smell of Fear Page #3

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as well as ten sheets of glass.

An electric car,

partially powered by solar panels.

But the truth is, gentlemen,

that I'm not worried about

any of these things.

Because no one is ever

going to know about them.

- What about Meinheimer and his report?

- He's going to tell the President.

Good question.

Why don't we just ask him?

- That's kidnapping!

- Good heavens!

- What about his speech on Tuesday?

- Dr. Meinheimer will deliver his speech.

It is my view that we must rely on

coal, oil and nuclear energy.

Our Dr. Meinheimer.

- Oh, my God!

- That's incredible!

Meet Earl Hacker,

former arts consultant to Jesse Helms.

As I explained to Mr. Hapsburg,

my fee is one million dollars,

and, might I add,

I'm worth every penny of it.

But you gentlemen

don't have any choice.

Do you?

After a good night's sleep,

I headed back to police headquarters.

I figured that if I buried myself

in police work,

I could forget about Jane

and maybe in the process

catch a vicious killer

before he struck again.

So far we had few clues

and no real leads.

I was hoping that the lab boys

had come up with something.

Shut it off!

- Take it easy.

- Say your prayers.

- Nice work.

- What?

Can you show us the results

from the Research Institute?

We weren't able to get

any clean fingerprints,

but we did find footprints

outside the Institute.

We made plaster casts of them.

A size 91/2 D.

We're running a trace on it.

But more interesting...

We also found this dinosaur footprint.

- A major find from the Paleolithic era.

- Anything else?

Yes, 20 feet down we discovered

ancient timbers from Noah's Ark.

About the case...

I'll be leaving for Boston tomorrow

where I'll deliver a major address

to the American Archaeological Society.

And I'm booked on Geraldo next week.

You're going on Geraldo

because of this?

No, my wife is a transsexual

Satan worshipper.

Meanwhile, we'll be continuing

fingerprint analysis,

fiber checks,

DNA breakdown and hair samples.

Then, using the microscopic dirt particles

on this footprint,

we'll get a geological breakdown

of the entire city.

- We may not have that kind of time.

- Then maybe this will help.

We found this wallet

on the curb outside the Institute.

We haven't examined it thoroughly.

It just came down from the lab.

"Hector Savage". From Detroit.

I remember this pug.

Ex-boxer.

His real name was Joey Chicago.

Yeah. He fought

under the name of Kid Minneapolis.

I saw Kid Minneapolis fight once,

in Cincinnati.

No, that's Kid New York.

He fought out of Philly.

He was killed in the ring in Houston

by Tex Colorado.

- The Arizona Assassin.

- Yeah, from Dakota.

- Was it North or South?

- North.

South Dakota was his brother.

From West Virginia.

You sure know your boxing.

All I know is:

never bet on the white guy.

- You've got an address?

- The card says, "Monique De Carlo".

"210 Bleckman Street."

That's the red-light district. I wonder

why Savage is hanging out down there.

Sex, Frank?

No, not right now, Ed.

We've got work to do.

The address we had for De Carlo

was in the city's Little Italy.

We went there, hoping it would

lead us to Hector Savage

and lead us to a clue

that would break the case wide open.

That's the cops.

You've got to get rid of them.

All right, I'll handle it.

Quick, hide in the basement.

You'll be safe down there.

- Ed.

- Frank.

- Red van.

- Yes, I know.

Jane said that she saw a red van

outside the Institute before the explosion.

- Let's take him down.

- No, he's not working alone.

- Bug the van. See where it goes.

- Good thinking.

- Nordberg!

- No problem.

Lieutenant Frank Drebin, Police Squad.

This is my Captain, Ed Hocken.

- Is this some kind of bust?

- It's very impressive, yes...

But we need to ask you

a few questions.

Listen. We're looking for

Hector Savage. Where is he?

Why should I tell you?

Because I'm the last line of defense

between sleaze like this

and the decent people in this town.

Hi, Frank. We got that D-83 Swedish

Sure-Grip Suck Machine you ordered.

It's a gift.

Frank, come here. Quick!

It's Savage. He's on the move.

What? Hey!

Hey! Stop, stop! I'm a police officer!

Let's go. But remember,

we can't let him spot us.

Pull over!

Nordberg's bugging device

is right on the money.

I'm not kidding! Stop!

Sh*t!

He's changing direction. Stop the car.

Oh, no!

- He's getting closer.

- We should see him any minute.

Keep your eyes peeled.

Oh, no!

Look, he's real close now.

Step on it!

Help! Stop, stop!

Frank, stop!

Stop right now! I've had it!

I said stop!

Help!

Drebin, Police Squad.

What do we have?

It's a tense situation.

Savage is holed up in that house.

- Says he's got hostages.

- He could be bluffing. Anything else?

Yeah. That red van is registered

to one Quentin Hapsburg.

Well, it looks like the cows

have come home to roost.

How are you doing, trooper?

Hey, stop firing!

Hold it! Stop firing!

Stop firing! Stop firing!

All right, give me the bullhorn.

This is Frank Drebin, Police Squad.

Throw down your guns

and come out with your hands up,

or come on out, then throw down

your guns, whichever you want.

Remember the two key elements:

One, guns to be thrown down.

Two, come on out.

You just try and take me, Drebin!

I've got more if you want them, copper!

- Looks like he's holding all the cards.

- Not all the cards.

How about it?

You can't drive that tank!

You're not checked-out on it!

Don't worry, Ed!

Just keep him busy.

All right, what do you want?

I want a car out front.

Something fun. A Porsche.

Then I want a plane ticket to Jamaica.

And I want a nice hotel.

No touristy place.

Something indicative of

the people and their culture.

We can't do that.

We're calling your bluff.

Now put your hands on top of your head

and come out.

We've got you surrounded

front and... hey!

Frank, what are you doing?

Where are you going? Frank!

Frank! Help!

- Your coat, sir?

- Yes, it is.

And I have a receipt to prove it.

- Telephone call, Commissioner.

- Thank you.

Excuse me.

Yes?

He did what?

How many animals escaped?

Oh, my God!

Good evening, Commissioner.

You're looking lovely tonight.

Do you realize that because of you

this city is being overrun by baboons?

Well, isn't that the fault of the voters?

Excuse me.

Thank you all for attending this

event in honor of Dr. Meinheimer,

who tomorrow

will make his historic address.

Along with the President, I pledge

to support his recommendations,

whatever they may be.

And now, please enjoy the evening.

I'll see you later.

May I cut in?

- What are you doing here?

- I enjoy a good party.

- Why are you really here?

- I can sum that up in three words:

"Quentin Hapsburg." I never liked him

from the moment I laid eyes on him.

The man is as dirty

as a coalminer's underwear in January.

What's gotten into you?

He's a kind, gentle, concerned man,

who cares about people and is not

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